Kara "Pigeon" Testers

bruce · Post by **bruce** » Thu Dec 02, 2004 3:59 pm

http://www.packedpowder.com/pigeonkara/saga.htm

She lives in PA. She spells badly. She's probably a collection of 17-year-old-guys, but just in case she's an actual slut, we should give Worm a small audio recorder, and then send him out so he can get laid, and record his snarky observations. I'll even chip in to buy him the book, since she only does guys who buy her book.

Worm's report would be comedy gold.

Bruce

Worm · Post by **Worm** » Thu Dec 02, 2004 4:59 pm

Yeah, I've seen that. Though I for some reason doubt it being real.

I SOOO HOPE U ENJOY MAH PICZ. I GIVE MAH FULL NOODZ TO GUYZ WHO ORDER MAH BOOK!!! ;)

Just n00dz anyway.

I think at best someone is actually typing out "mah" in replace of "my" in the name of parody, or at worst it's a dumb party slut who probably appears 20x more stupid when she has to communicate by typed word.

Lysander · Post by **Lysander** » Thu Dec 02, 2004 6:58 pm

Wasp****: shes not writing me

Wasp****: wait whats your name

Pigeon Kara: what a bitch

Wasp****: she wrote

Pigeon Kara: Marissa y?

Pigeon Kara: her name is EPswty33de

Wasp****: EPswty33de: ur girl.. who might that be? EPswty33de: oohh pigeon EPswty33de: yeah she's a real prize let me tell you!

Pigeon Kara: whatta bithc

Pigeon Kara: bitch

Wasp****:

Wasp****: shes marissa

Pigeon Kara: tell her i model

Wasp****: EPswty33de: probably got all kinds os STD's

Wasp****: EPswty33de: no it's Kara EPswty33de: that skank

Wasp****: she says ur name is Kara

Pigeon Kara: what

Pigeon Kara: she said her name is Kara

Wasp****: i dont know. didnt u email say Kara

Wasp****: wasnt that the picture u sent me

Wasp****: she says u are ugly

Pigeon Kara: shes ugly

Pigeon Kara: my name is Kara

Wasp****: u said ur name was vanessa

Wasp****: she not writing

Pigeon Kara: and i did sent u the

Wasp****: oh

Wasp****: she says u are a skank

Pigeon Kara: wait a sec......

Pigeon Kara: nevermind

Wasp****:

Wasp****: she models EPswty33de: no way

Pigeon Kara: ok stop talkin to her

Wasp****: do u know her?

Pigeon Kara: no i dont

Pigeon Kara: she knows me

Wasp****: how does she know u

Pigeon Kara: i dont know

Wasp****: oh well

Pigeon Kara: im gettin pissed

Wasp****: this sounds like a game to me

Pigeon Kara: yeah well i dont know

Pigeon Kara: she needs a life

Wasp****: she sounds hot

Wasp****: but your hotter

Wasp****: cuz i already saw your pic

Wasp****: what size tits do u have?

Pigeon Kara: 34c

Pigeon Kara: whatever talk to her if u want

Pigeon Kara: shes some bitch whos just pissin me

Wasp****: why can't we all be friends?

Pigeon Kara: of

Pigeon Kara: off

Pigeon Kara: what????

Pigeon Kara: r u serious??

Pigeon Kara: is that ur g/f??

Wasp****: i dont know.. it sounds like u all have beef

Wasp****: do u know her seriously

Pigeon Kara: b/c she said her b/f is Kevin

Pigeon Kara: no i dont

Wasp****: or are you just mad at her

Wasp****: im not her bf

Wasp****: i never even met her before

Pigeon Kara: NO I DONT KNOW HER

Wasp****: oh

Wasp****: she says she knows u

Pigeon Kara: im not gonna be friends w/ some bitch who calls me a slut and some girl i dont know

Wasp****: and saw ur pics

Pigeon Kara: well she wont tell me her name

Pigeon Kara: fuckin ho

Wasp****: she went offline or blocked me

Wasp****: what is this about?

Pigeon Kara: oh ok

Pigeon Kara: i dont know what its about

Pigeon Kara: if i knew id tell u

Wasp****: i see

Wasp****: anyway

Pigeon Kara: i dont know her!!!!

Wasp****: what do u do for fun

Pigeon Kara: what school do u go to again?

Wasp****: Boringsville U

Wasp****: i hate that color

Pigeon Kara: good i hate it too

Pigeon Kara: BU right?

Wasp****: yes

Pigeon Kara: and u live in Wilkes Barre

Wasp****: sorta

Wasp****: scranton area

Pigeon Kara: yeah

Pigeon Kara: ur at home right now

Wasp****: yeah why?

Pigeon Kara: yeah as in i remember

Wasp****: are u sure u remember me?

Pigeon Kara: yeah i do

Wasp****: I am not trying to sound personal but from what this girl told me you dont remember guys.. she said u play guys

Wasp****: but i believe your side

Pigeon Kara: i dont play guys

Pigeon Kara: she obviously knows me from an ex

Pigeon Kara: shes lyin

Pigeon Kara: i get played

Wasp****: have you slept with a lot of guys?

Pigeon Kara: i was makin sure that u go to BU

Pigeon Kara: i made mistakes

Wasp****: Aww im sorry

Pigeon Kara: i've been w/ 5 guys and one was rape ok

Wasp****: You were raped?

Wasp****: OMG i am so sorry

Pigeon Kara: it was statgitory but yeah

Wasp****: Did you ever feel suicidal?

Wasp****: How old was the guy

Pigeon Kara: he was 18 and i was 16

Wasp****: Is he in jail?

Pigeon Kara: no hes in the Marines now

Pigeon Kara: we never pressed charges

Wasp****: why?

Wasp****: if he raped u why didnt u

Pigeon Kara: it bothers me when ppl know so much about me and i dont know them

Pigeon Kara: i dont know ask my parents that

Wasp****: did he trick u into having sex with u

Pigeon Kara: yeah he did

Wasp****: did u want to?

Pigeon Kara: no

Pigeon Kara: but i caved in

Wasp****: u didnt enjoy it at all?

Pigeon Kara: i said no a lot and he still convinced me

Pigeon Kara: no i didnt enjoy it at all

Wasp****: i mean i dont want to sound like im joking but I would love it if a girl raped me

Wasp****: i guess its different for girls

Pigeon Kara: its different when u have someone who's bigger and stronger

Pigeon Kara: and that he might hurt u

Pigeon Kara: he was my b/f but i didt want to

Wasp****: i know thats true. if a fat girl raped me i dont know if i'd enjoy it

Pigeon Kara: and he had a big knife in his car

Wasp****: how long ago was this?

Pigeon Kara: last May

Wasp****: u think he would have killed you?

Pigeon Kara: about a year and a 1/2 ago

Wasp****: wow! are u still getting over this?

Pigeon Kara: he hurt me towards the end of the relationship

Wasp****: what did he do

Pigeon Kara: he started verbally abusing me and he slapped me once

Wasp****: are u comfortable talking about this?

Pigeon Kara: yeah i try to get over it

Pigeon Kara: its jsut hard

Pigeon Kara: im ok w/ it

Wasp****: what do u mean verbal abuse?

Pigeon Kara: like he called me a stupid bitch

Pigeon Kara: a slut

Pigeon Kara: a whore

Pigeon Kara: stuff like that

Wasp****: why did he call u a slut if u never slept with him?

Wasp****: how long together?

Pigeon Kara: i did sleep w/ him remember

Pigeon Kara: he raped me

Pigeon Kara: we were together for a month

Wasp****: i know but i meant before that

Wasp****: was he your first?

Pigeon Kara: no he was my second

Pigeon Kara: my first i thought i was in love w/ hin

Pigeon Kara: m

Wasp****: well at least he wasnt the first

...Jesus. I could become an international multimedia superstar just by MiSTing this website. >_<

Worm · Post by **Worm** » Thu Dec 02, 2004 8:05 pm

I like how her lack of character is evident in that she says "Hey I was raped" when some eighteen year old talked her into giving it up when she was younger.

If this is fake, it's pretty funny.

Vitriola · Post by **Vitriola** » Thu Dec 02, 2004 8:20 pm

Pigeon Kara wrote:Yay its december. U kno i was all excited about today. thingz were good i wuz gettin mah sex. i took mah shower and harvey came in there w/ me and then i go on mah bulletin board and pple were just being realli mean and calling me a slut but its ok cuz i told em i was. i mean gawd itz nawt lyke they are there wen i sleep w/ them so how wud they kno.

Writing as bad as that is actually harder than doing it right.

bruce · Post by **bruce** » Thu Dec 02, 2004 8:45 pm

Vitriola wrote:Writing as bad as that is actually harder than doing it right.

It's remarkably consistent. I wonder if the author is actually writing it in English and then feeding it through a Kara filter analogous to the Swedish Chef or Jive filters.

Bruce

Ice Cream Jonsey · Post by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Fri Dec 03, 2004 12:30 am

Choosing either to not read that whole log or quit my job so I would have the time to do just that, I picked one part at more or less random and read only that. Here's what I got out of it:

Wasp****: was he your first?

Pigeon Kara: no he was my second

Pigeon Kara: my first i thought i was in love w/ hin

Pigeon Kara: m

So there are four "mystery" characters to the Wasp there. Maybe they are swear words! WaspFuck? WaspCunt? It could be ANYTHING there! I feel like Reed Richards right after Sue gave him head and let him work the rest of the night in the lab. The possibilities are limitless!

Next up we have Kara stating that some guy was her second. I'm going to go ahead and -- well, I'll be taking wagers that whoever that Unknown Syphilitic Soldier was, it wasn't her last.

... Ah, and now Kara is sort of taking the opportunity to blather on about her first. I'm getting the impression that she'd wax poetic about him over anything. Hey Kara, why is the first part of your handle 'pigeon'? I LOVED W/ HIM I THOUGHT I WAS W/ LOVE W/ HIM!

And then just a random "m." It's like how they used to do sleaze rags in 1800s England! The Illustrious M____ ! Or maybe M_____ was her "first." Who can tell, who can tell.

I'm not scrolling up to the top of this thread to see who linked the nine-page AIM log and really, with the sheer lack of content that we've had here lately I guess I can't complain, but is this going to get Worm laid? If not, well, I guess I don't quite see the point.

Lysander · Post by **Lysander** » Fri Dec 03, 2004 10:17 am

I'm the guilty culprit, and the ****s are actually 1147 or someshit. I know this because I used my ultra-spiffy detective skills to read the link that led me to the log which has his name right there. Why those numbers are sensored in the actual log but not on the website are truly mind-boggling. But that's just the way it is.

Vitriola · Post by **Vitriola** » Fri Dec 03, 2004 11:31 am

bruce wrote:It's remarkably consistent. I wonder if the author is actually writing it in English and then feeding it through a Kara filter analogous to the Swedish Chef or Jive filters.

I didn't find the actual filter, but it appears that all the idiotz on the Xanga blogs are using it too. This could be collectively the stupidest generation ever.