JC Fantasy Football

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

Anybody up for some fantasy football? Da King and I are usually in a pay league each year, but I thought I'd open up a free league to the members of the BBS. (Also, admittedly, a few of the guys who are in the pay league are complete spunk-farmers with a laughable grasp of the English language and I'd be embarassed for you guys to have to interact with them.)

I figure if we get at least eight of us on this, we'd have a viable league. If any of you have interest just let me know (and this includes you, Lex, even though the games are played a few thousand miles away from your home, it's all good when it comes to this. In fact, Milkunits grabbed second place two years ago and he had never played fantasy football before in his life, so there's no inherent advantage to watching 6 games a week and obsessing over a particular team like I do).

I'll set this all up on Yahoo or some other free site and provide league info if it looks like this is a go. As Stan Lee said as he sprinted down the field and took that one guy's head off with a crushing open-field tackle, Excelsior!!

[Everyone]

Anybody up for some fantasy football?

No.

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

You'd better hope not, because you would not win a SINGLE GAME in a head-to-head league. Not a SINGLE GAME. Remember how Jay Leno used to make fun of the Lions when they lost their first 13 games? Well, that will be reality for you on this board, except that it will go for 17 weeks, not 13, and everyone else will be throwing a lot more hate and bile at you than in a typical Jay Leno monologue.


Get the losers and flaming cowards out of the way! WHO'S UP FOR THIS, COME ON NOW.

[Lex]

This thread has been up for 3 days.
Let it go.

[gsdgsd]

Hey, I'll do it.

Already this year, I've been killed in fantasy hockey by someone who's never seen a game. And my brother is running away with fantasy baseball despite not having paid attention to the sport since the Royals were last in the World Series.

So I may as well complete the trifecta and lose (using all Buccaneers and Broncos, of course) to someone who hates football.

Greg

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

This thread has been up for 3 days.
Let it go.

I will murder you while you sleep and then travel back in time and murder your parents, just for the hell of it.

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

Hey, I'll do it.

Already this year, I've been killed in fantasy hockey by someone who's never seen a game. And my brother is running away with fantasy baseball despite not having paid attention to the sport since the Royals were last in the World Series.

So I may as well complete the trifecta and lose (using all Buccaneers and Broncos, of course) to someone who hates football.

Greg

Yes! All right! I kind of feel like Jerry Maguire when Bridget Jones there finally steps up to the plate, but nevertheless we got two now. If the Milker ever shows his face around here we'd have three. It's all about building a sense of community, but unfortunately this community seems to be akin to:

ICJ, Greg, Milker: Wartime Germany circa WWII
Ben, Lex: The rest of Europe

But there will be no Einstein going back in time and assassinating anybody for you miserable lot. Instead it will be a Blitzkrieg... of Comedy!

[Eric]

I'll give it a try.

Just realized, in my long career of wasting time on frivolous activites, I have never tried fantasy sports.

A blot on my resume.

Besides, I've so much lost interest in football the past few years, I realized I'm lucky if I can name a player on any given team. And, after baseball ends, you're in the "who cares" part of the basketball season, so there's a real sports gap there. Gotta educate myself.

Come on now. Let's not let this dream die!


Eric

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

OK, I'll set the league up and provide information on it next week. Figure we can go for a "head to head" system where you play someone else week, maybe start a quarterback, running back, wide receiver, tight end, kicker, and a defensive player or two. Maybe two or three spots that are wild cards for either WR or RB as well. That would give us around 9 or 10 players for "starters" and then we'd have just a few more for backups. Yahoo has default rankings for players that everyone can use as a kind of guide as to who is a decent fantasy football player. It usually maps to reality pretty well, but every once in a while there are some anomolies (for instance, Jeff Garcia of the 49ers may not be the first guy you think of when thinking of the league's best quarterbacks, but he's been the #1 or #2 FF quarterback the last couple of years).

[Eric]

I'll check out that Yahoo stuff. Now that Ryan Leaf's retired my whole strategy's down the drain.

Eric

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

OK, I set us up with a league. Here's the info:

join url: http://football.fantasysports.yahoo.com ... gisterteam
league number: 204581
password: krips

I decided to go with team defense rather than players to make it a bit easier on everyone. If there is sufficient demand we can change that.

Here's the scoring info:

Auto
Draft Status: predraft
Draft Ready: No
Maximum Number of Teams: 16
Maximum Players on a Team: 14
Maximum Moves: No maximum
Maximum Trades: No maximum
Scoring Type: Head-to-Head League
Waiver Time: 2 days
Last Trade Date: Friday, November 22
Trade Reject Time: 2 days
Playoffs: No Playoffs
Bye Points: Yes
Negative Points: Yes
Starting Positions: QB, WR, RB, TE, WR/TE, WR/RB, WR/RB, K, DEF

Statistical Categories
(Offense):
Passing Yards (45 yards per point)
Passing Touchdowns (6)
Interceptions (-2)
Rushing Yards (15 yards per point)
Rushing Touchdowns (6)
Receptions (0.01)
Reception Yards (15 yards per point)
Reception Touchdowns (6)
Return Yards (50 yards per point)
Return Touchdowns (6)
2 Point Conversions (2)
Fumbles Lost (-2)

Statistical Categories
(Kickers):
Field Goals 0-19 Yards (3)
Field Goals 20-29 Yards (3)
Field Goals 30-39 Yards (3)
Field Goals 40-49 Yards (4)
Field Goals 50+ Yards (5)
Point After Attempt Made (1)

Statistical Categories
(Defense Teams):
0 Pts Allowed (10)
1-6 Pts Allowed (7)
7-13 Pts Allowed (4)
14-20 Pts Allowed (1)
21-27 Pts Allowed (0)
28-34 Pts Allowed (-1)
35+ Pts Allowed (-4)
Sack (2)
Interception (2)
Fumble Recovery (2)
Touchdown (6)
Safety (2)
Block Kick (2)

If we have an odd number of teams I'll ask my brother to sign up. Let me know if anyone's got questions, comments, suggestions or so forth. Otherwise, feel free to sign up and change the draft rankings so that they reflect the guys you would like to draft in the other that you think they ought to be in.

[gsdgsd]

All signed up. Now, as long as I don't repeat last year's mistakes (top two running backs: Terrell Davis and Mike Alstott), this should usher in an era of dominance not seen since the 1976 Tampa Bay Buccaneers!

In real-life football, it hasn't really been noted yet ... but this is the first year that the Saints and the Bucs will be going head-to-head in their division. Granted, they're competing for supremacy in what's likely going to be one of the weakest divisions, but still.

Greg

[Eric]

OK. I have signed up and played with my rankings a bit. Not like I would know better but I've got to (hopefully)pick a few guys to root for in the real world. Anyone might want Ricky Williams for Faulk and Warner? (Just looking ahead)


Eric

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

I have previously made trades for Ricky in the other leagues I've done, but I think I'm gonna cool on him this year. Good player, but probably not worthy of being the #12 overall selection that I made last year. (By "probably" I mean "definitely.")

Cos this year... THE DEUCE IS LOOSE!!!!!


Also: Mike Sousa signed up as "Brady or Bledsoe?" which has a great Ed Wood thing going for it, ala "Glen or Glenda?" which is, in my opinion, the finest name ever given to a piece of cinema. We've got four teams so far, and I'll go on a membership spree if it seems like sign-ups are petering out before we get to at least 8 teams.

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

In real-life football, it hasn't really been noted yet ... but this is the first year that the Saints and the Bucs will be going head-to-head in their division. Granted, they're competing for supremacy in what's likely going to be one of the weakest divisions, but still.

I didn't get nearly enough shit from you for the whipping that the Bucs put on the Saints at the end of the season last year. And believe me, I definitely should have. I watched that game over at Da King's house and it was just a burial, the likes of which I hadn't seen against the Saints in a long, long time. Course, the next three games would be just as bad, but I didn't know that then. They totally laid down with a playoff spot in question. I can take a lot of unfortunate circumstances as a fan, but when the players give up it really, really makes you wonder why you bother.

Therefore, by all rights the Bucs should double-up the Saints on September 8th, Technically a lot of the quitters on N.O. are gone, but I dunno. Alstott just did whatever the hell he wanted last year and the only guy who was particularly interested in tackling him was Sammy Knight -- eight yards downfield. A part of me hopes that the "two fat guys" style we are going with at defensive tackle fixes things but I don't see it. Big guys like that rarely stay healthy or in shape for the entire season. Here's a laundry list of things that need to go right for the game to be even close:

o Norman Hand & Grady Jackson are in shape, healthy, and take away the pounding inside
o Rookie Charles Grant looks good against the run at DE
o Bryan Cox plays the entire game at LB, everyone shuts the hell up and does what he tells them to
o Fred Thomas plays the game of his life against Keyshawn, what with Dale Carter being gone and all
o Oh, and the offense has to score against the defense that held them in check last year

I'm not trying to reverse-jinx my team or anything, nor am I attempting to provide excuses for the eventual probable loss (it's not an excuse when it's a fact). But unless Gruden attempts to have Brad Johnson win the game solely through the air and thus completely ignore what worked the year before I'd say that the Bucs over the Saints is the best bet for week one.

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

We're still at five. I'll try to scare up some more citizens for this thing.

NFL news:

o Indianapolis Colts backup running back Damien Rhodes is lost for the season with a torn ACL. Rhodes did a fine job backing up Edgerrin James last year after James was injured and lost for the year.

o Dallas Cowboys WR Raghib "Rocket" Ismail is gone for the season with a herniated disc in his neck. Has anybody done less with more than Ismail?

o Kansas City Chiefs TE Tony Gonzalez has yet to sign his franchise offer sheet and is a holdout. At this point it seems unlikely that he will play the first game. You have to crack a smile at that -- GM Carl Peterson has better UTTERLY UNABLE to draft and develop a QB, HB or WR since he has had control of the team. Gonzalez at TE is the closest thing to a homegrown skill player that they have. His comment when Gonzalez mentioned that he wanted to be paid like a top-flight WR was that "he should have come out as a wide receiver, then." Yeah, way to go, Peterson -- if history has shown anything, it's that if he WAS a pure receiver, your drafting hunches would have been nowhere near him when he came out.

The first two guys you definitely want off your list, and it's a crap shoot with whether or not Gonzalez comes back. I have no idea what to expect with his situation.

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

Two other things:

Colts.com reports the Indianapolis Colts have waived RB Ben Gay.

Create your own Ben Gay joke for fun and profit!

Also, the Buffalo Bills have released former first round pick Erik Flowers. Only notable in a personal sense because if you were to examine the football jersey hanging up in the Holy Avenger's bedroom in the game "A Crimson Spring" you would see that it is a Flowers one, with the underlying prediction that the Bills would win the Super Bowl in the future and that Flowers would be an integral part of the team.

Unknown to me at the time was that he'd eventually be cut, and I also kind of glossed over the fact tha the civilian identity of my protagonist there walked around with the word "FLOWERS" on his frigging back. Dark and gritty indeed.

[Eric]

Whoa. Like I'm supposed to know this NFL news stuff? I'm kinda rusty. Still trying to figure out if Jim Brown is gonna be out of jail for the season opener.

Been doing some study though. So far, I've learned....

Marshall Faulk

Right. And, by the way, he's out for the season. Honest. Why would I lie?

--
Eric

"You can't cheat an honest man" -- W.C. Fields

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

I'm bumping this, as I am going on an extreme membership drive. The first game is on Thursday. For some reason I thought the NFL started on Sunday this year, as it has every other year in its existence. DAMN THEM. Anyway, we've got five right now, which isn't enough. Feel free to pass out the league info to anyone tangentially related to this BBS, yourself, your friends, enemies, foes and sidekicks.

[Eric]

I was messing with my rankings list last night since I finally noticed the draft was automatic. As if I know better! I figured there must be some "angle" for ranking for such a thing but couldn't think of any.

But note for others on the Board, apparently you don't have to do much of anything,, if you don't want, but watch the team the computer selects for you.


Eric