If you are a regular reader / poster of this BBS, do me a favor and ignore this thread -- I just need a place to dump all the info there for the non-JC football league I am in.
If you're in the actual league, feel free to post whatever you want, but make sure you put your name in the "name" field, or it'll just come off as "Guest."
Robb's e-mail address: beaver@zombieworld.com
Draft Date & Time: Saturday August 23rd, 8:00 EST
Draft order:
1. Fodge
2. Sailer
3. Mike
4. Milker
5. Henry
6. Chris
7. Oelheim
8. Luddy
9. Zach
10. Colville
11. Robb
12. Bundy
Confirmed Trades:
Sailer sends #2 overall pick to Robb for #11 and #14.
Chris sends #6 overall pick to Mike for #3.
Chris sends 6th round pick to Mike.
Mike sends 12th round pick to Chris.
FF Info (non JC)
Moderators: AArdvark, Ice Cream Jonsey
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Ice Cream Jonsey
- Posts: 30451
- Joined: Sat Apr 27, 2002 2:44 pm
- Location: Colorado
- Contact:
FF Info (non JC)
Last edited by Ice Cream Jonsey on Thu Aug 21, 2003 12:08 pm, edited 1 time in total.
the dark and gritty...Ice Cream Jonsey!
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Vitriola
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Ice Cream Jonsey
- Posts: 30451
- Joined: Sat Apr 27, 2002 2:44 pm
- Location: Colorado
- Contact:
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Ice Cream Jonsey
- Posts: 30451
- Joined: Sat Apr 27, 2002 2:44 pm
- Location: Colorado
- Contact:
Albuquerque Alchies (0-1-0)
Fantasy Gods (1-0-0)
The new kids on the block versus the old warhorse of Extraordinary Fantasy Gaming! A guy whose #1 sport is really hockey versus a guy whose #1 sport is really basketball! A man -- Steven -- found in the Christian bible (it's towards the back) versus another one -- Zachary -- more at home in the Necronomicon!
Monday Night Matchup is fucking on!
All the stars are out this weekend, boys. Drew Bledsoe gets the nod for Steve Oelheim and the Alchies, with Daunte Culpepper manning the helm for the Fantasy Gods. Bledsoe looked efficient, confident and in charge, finally driving the Bills' offense the way it was meant to and not driving it like a bunch of half-Korean, half-Arab old women trying to navigate the skies above NYC against some Patriots with a Honda 747. Bledsoe has weapons aplenty, and if Josh Reed could catch a fucking football like he can catch shit on Buffalo radio for not being able to catch a football Bledsoe may be deadlier still.
Culpepper looked good against a Green Bay squad that decided to take the first half completely off. Luckily for the Fantasy Gods, Culpepper is going up against a Bears squad that took both halves off against the Niners. I don't want to imply that the Bears are going to suck cock this year, but much in the same way that the old Eagles stadium came equipped with a jail, the Bears new stadium is going to have installed a bunch of stomach pumps.
As for running backs... who the hell knows. Faulk can get nine touches or thirty in any given game because his coach is the dumbest pure head coach in the NFL. Travis Henry looked excellent last week, except for when he decided that actually being anywhere near the handoff on a rushing attempt was for maggots and cowards ran to the outside without coming within five yards of the pigskin. Did Greg Williams, noted professional pussy, yell at the Grape Ape for this one? Doubt it.
Eddie George is in for a tough day against the 98 Bucs, I mean, 03 Colts. Charlie Garner ought to not even slow down against the woeful Bengals, provided the Raiders don't get arrogant with this one. Ah, well, if you can't trust Head Coach Bill Callahan... who can you trust? Callahan should have got one of those "Thinker," nee "Squatter" trophies that Mike Sherwin threatens to give out for Fort Collins Summer Softball because he's all about the cerebral part of the matchup. Regardless, advantage Garner.
I had this whole thing on Packers TE ready to go, but then I double-checked and he's got Franks and not Walls. Heap verus Franks this week? Steve and Zach, you fucking assholes. A set of solid wide receivers also cuts down on the comedy. Next week's MNM will be the two worst teams so we can all enjoy this more. Darrell Jackson does get an Arizona defense which is going to put up as much of a fight as Sailer's dog Caffrey does when it comes time for some ultragay neighborhood canine rape. Ruff ruff, indeed!
Hey, remember the last time Michael Strahan faced Kyle Turley? He had three sacks. I remember, because as a Saints fan, this is just another day at the office for us. Strahan seemed to remember as he got another field day against Turley the Ram last week. Strahan must be licking his chops at going up against the buttchudders that Dallas is going to throw at him. Max protect, Cowboys, you wouldn't want your QB hurt or anything. Oelheim throws out half the Kansas City defense hoping they'll be on the field forever and rack up the tackles. He also has Nick Harper. While Nick Harper is probable, Nick Harper's ears are definitely going to be in the game -- acting as a giant fucking satellite dish to receive transmissions for the scoreboard. Harper (and Oelheim) have turned the NFL into a Freak Show, and while I respect that, I can't recommend it.
Fantasy Gods 99.15
Albuquerque Alchies 78.07
Fantasy Gods (1-0-0)
The new kids on the block versus the old warhorse of Extraordinary Fantasy Gaming! A guy whose #1 sport is really hockey versus a guy whose #1 sport is really basketball! A man -- Steven -- found in the Christian bible (it's towards the back) versus another one -- Zachary -- more at home in the Necronomicon!
Monday Night Matchup is fucking on!
All the stars are out this weekend, boys. Drew Bledsoe gets the nod for Steve Oelheim and the Alchies, with Daunte Culpepper manning the helm for the Fantasy Gods. Bledsoe looked efficient, confident and in charge, finally driving the Bills' offense the way it was meant to and not driving it like a bunch of half-Korean, half-Arab old women trying to navigate the skies above NYC against some Patriots with a Honda 747. Bledsoe has weapons aplenty, and if Josh Reed could catch a fucking football like he can catch shit on Buffalo radio for not being able to catch a football Bledsoe may be deadlier still.
Culpepper looked good against a Green Bay squad that decided to take the first half completely off. Luckily for the Fantasy Gods, Culpepper is going up against a Bears squad that took both halves off against the Niners. I don't want to imply that the Bears are going to suck cock this year, but much in the same way that the old Eagles stadium came equipped with a jail, the Bears new stadium is going to have installed a bunch of stomach pumps.
As for running backs... who the hell knows. Faulk can get nine touches or thirty in any given game because his coach is the dumbest pure head coach in the NFL. Travis Henry looked excellent last week, except for when he decided that actually being anywhere near the handoff on a rushing attempt was for maggots and cowards ran to the outside without coming within five yards of the pigskin. Did Greg Williams, noted professional pussy, yell at the Grape Ape for this one? Doubt it.
Eddie George is in for a tough day against the 98 Bucs, I mean, 03 Colts. Charlie Garner ought to not even slow down against the woeful Bengals, provided the Raiders don't get arrogant with this one. Ah, well, if you can't trust Head Coach Bill Callahan... who can you trust? Callahan should have got one of those "Thinker," nee "Squatter" trophies that Mike Sherwin threatens to give out for Fort Collins Summer Softball because he's all about the cerebral part of the matchup. Regardless, advantage Garner.
I had this whole thing on Packers TE ready to go, but then I double-checked and he's got Franks and not Walls. Heap verus Franks this week? Steve and Zach, you fucking assholes. A set of solid wide receivers also cuts down on the comedy. Next week's MNM will be the two worst teams so we can all enjoy this more. Darrell Jackson does get an Arizona defense which is going to put up as much of a fight as Sailer's dog Caffrey does when it comes time for some ultragay neighborhood canine rape. Ruff ruff, indeed!
Hey, remember the last time Michael Strahan faced Kyle Turley? He had three sacks. I remember, because as a Saints fan, this is just another day at the office for us. Strahan seemed to remember as he got another field day against Turley the Ram last week. Strahan must be licking his chops at going up against the buttchudders that Dallas is going to throw at him. Max protect, Cowboys, you wouldn't want your QB hurt or anything. Oelheim throws out half the Kansas City defense hoping they'll be on the field forever and rack up the tackles. He also has Nick Harper. While Nick Harper is probable, Nick Harper's ears are definitely going to be in the game -- acting as a giant fucking satellite dish to receive transmissions for the scoreboard. Harper (and Oelheim) have turned the NFL into a Freak Show, and while I respect that, I can't recommend it.
Fantasy Gods 99.15
Albuquerque Alchies 78.07
the dark and gritty...Ice Cream Jonsey!
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mikesherwin
I’m going to change Monday night match-up up a hair. Frankly I’m sick of talking about each of you and how much your home town sucks. Since the REAL half way point for the NFL season lands on a Wednesday after next week (17 week season) I figured I’d recap some of the blunders, mishaps, hijinx and moronity that has gone on. BTW the only decent game on the schedule is me vs. Milker so the match-up at the end WILL CORRESPOND!
TEAM GRADES
The 12th place San Jose Rousseres.
Where do I begin? The crowning achievement of this ass team was probably beating me. This quite possibly is the worst fantasy team ever assembled. 3 BENGALS? 2 beat-up and broken down Running backs. Peter Warrick as WR 1? Possibly the worst defense of all-time. We’ve all taken our shots at people on draft day, but even Jeanes was getting his kicks in on this one. Unfortunately we’ve come to expect this out of the Roussers the last 3 years. Projected finish- 3-14 dead last.
GRADE- F- How do you not have one decent player? Oh I know your number one pick rots on your roster behind John Kitna.
The 11th place Jenna Bushs Bush
Take the 50 bucks, flush it down a toilet and find a new “hobby”. I don’t really have a problem with Henry sucking at fantasy football. I do have a problem with him clutching on to Priest Holmes like a child breast feeding from Pamela Anderson. TRADE HIM FOR THREE DECENT PLAYERS AND MAYBE WIN 5 OR SIX GAMES! I guarantee you if I ever find myself in the neighborhood of 11th place my blockbuster deal won’t be dealing Tony Gonzalez for Tom Brady. If you have Priest Holmes there is no reason to be in 11th place. The best part is Jeanes holding on to Chad Pennington. HE’S WORTH THE ROSTER SPOT AND WILL SAVE YOUR TEAM FROM IMPENDING DOOM IN WEEK 30! THIS AINT AKEEPER LEAGUE! Projected finish WITH HOLMES 5-12. Without 7-10
Grade: F-(minus) THERE IS ACTUAL EFFORT HERE! UNBELIEVABLE!
The 10th Place Against All Odds
Has there ever been a dumber fucking team name? He makes Fodge’s shitty team name sound like Shakespeare. What odds are you up against? Gravity? Sailer charging you rent? The odds of a flashback to the fluke 2000 season? The odds any restaurant within 500 miles will ever have all you can eat crab again? As far as I see it the only odds you are up against are 2 to 1 that Jeanes finishes ahead of you. And I don’t need to hear “honestly my teams not that bad” ever again. 2-5 is 2-5 chuckles. Projected finish- Honestly his team is not that bad. 9-8
Grade C- Davis sucks at fantasy sports and this is right where he belongs. To quote a Kodak Performance Appraisal- YOU MEET EXPECTATIONS!
The 9th Place Albuquerque Alchies
Oelheim enjoyed a nice little run 2 years ago and is paying for it in spades. He is another one willing to sit on his hands and enjoy the filth of a 9th place finish. When I got the Bledsoe for Alexander offer I pontificated this-The chances of him and me ever making trade with him are worse than my chances of getting all of your sexy mothers in the sack at the same time. Not likely but monumental for me if it happens. Maybe I’m being a little too hard. 3-4 isn’t the end of the world, but being 3-4 and a Kitna to Warrick TD away from Luddy is. Projected finish. Since he is finicky about making deals I will project a status quo finish of 7-10 .
GRADE: C+ he has managed to win games with Brad Johnson being the only consistent player on his roster.
TEAM GRADES
The 12th place San Jose Rousseres.
Where do I begin? The crowning achievement of this ass team was probably beating me. This quite possibly is the worst fantasy team ever assembled. 3 BENGALS? 2 beat-up and broken down Running backs. Peter Warrick as WR 1? Possibly the worst defense of all-time. We’ve all taken our shots at people on draft day, but even Jeanes was getting his kicks in on this one. Unfortunately we’ve come to expect this out of the Roussers the last 3 years. Projected finish- 3-14 dead last.
GRADE- F- How do you not have one decent player? Oh I know your number one pick rots on your roster behind John Kitna.
The 11th place Jenna Bushs Bush
Take the 50 bucks, flush it down a toilet and find a new “hobby”. I don’t really have a problem with Henry sucking at fantasy football. I do have a problem with him clutching on to Priest Holmes like a child breast feeding from Pamela Anderson. TRADE HIM FOR THREE DECENT PLAYERS AND MAYBE WIN 5 OR SIX GAMES! I guarantee you if I ever find myself in the neighborhood of 11th place my blockbuster deal won’t be dealing Tony Gonzalez for Tom Brady. If you have Priest Holmes there is no reason to be in 11th place. The best part is Jeanes holding on to Chad Pennington. HE’S WORTH THE ROSTER SPOT AND WILL SAVE YOUR TEAM FROM IMPENDING DOOM IN WEEK 30! THIS AINT AKEEPER LEAGUE! Projected finish WITH HOLMES 5-12. Without 7-10
Grade: F-(minus) THERE IS ACTUAL EFFORT HERE! UNBELIEVABLE!
The 10th Place Against All Odds
Has there ever been a dumber fucking team name? He makes Fodge’s shitty team name sound like Shakespeare. What odds are you up against? Gravity? Sailer charging you rent? The odds of a flashback to the fluke 2000 season? The odds any restaurant within 500 miles will ever have all you can eat crab again? As far as I see it the only odds you are up against are 2 to 1 that Jeanes finishes ahead of you. And I don’t need to hear “honestly my teams not that bad” ever again. 2-5 is 2-5 chuckles. Projected finish- Honestly his team is not that bad. 9-8
Grade C- Davis sucks at fantasy sports and this is right where he belongs. To quote a Kodak Performance Appraisal- YOU MEET EXPECTATIONS!
The 9th Place Albuquerque Alchies
Oelheim enjoyed a nice little run 2 years ago and is paying for it in spades. He is another one willing to sit on his hands and enjoy the filth of a 9th place finish. When I got the Bledsoe for Alexander offer I pontificated this-The chances of him and me ever making trade with him are worse than my chances of getting all of your sexy mothers in the sack at the same time. Not likely but monumental for me if it happens. Maybe I’m being a little too hard. 3-4 isn’t the end of the world, but being 3-4 and a Kitna to Warrick TD away from Luddy is. Projected finish. Since he is finicky about making deals I will project a status quo finish of 7-10 .
GRADE: C+ he has managed to win games with Brad Johnson being the only consistent player on his roster.
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mikesherwin
The 8th Place Rochester Radiation
Jesus Christ, I WILL BE naming everyone’s team for them next year. Since the Radiation have never had the pleasure of winning anything its time to find a new name. How about ALGAR’s HALF-ORC TRIBE gameboy? The Radiation represent the Mason-Dixon line of THE LEAGUE OF EXTRAORDINARY CHUDS. If they win against Beaver they officially have become a non-slave state. Not to hammer on the present but once this guy started getting his pole smoked again he does stupid shit like not filling his roster (HELLO COLES AND GARDNER ON BYE WEEK!) Anyhow he’ll never amount to anything in his own league due to too much “meddling” and his penchant (also: proclivity or bent) for Saints. Projected finish 7-10. BTW
Record before woman moving in 3-0. Record after 0-4. WHAT A FLAMING PUSSY! You make Milkers whooped ass look like Peter North.
Grade- D
The 7th Place Steamboat Tuggers
Ahhhh. Sailer and Halloween the perfect match. I got some costume ideas for this human Jack O’Lantern. Instead of going as Gruden, how about Charles Bronsons stiff body, he has been in the ground about a week. His already leathery mug is probably at the same level of puke as yours is right now. You could also go as that guy who got hit in the face by acid. Leatherface form Texas Chainsaw Massacre is also a good choice. Speaking of massacres, how does this dimwit do it? He is 3rd in points and rotting in 7th place. One look at the cavalcade of failed running back might explain it.
NOW IS THE PART OF MONDAY NIGHT MATCH-UP WHERE WE SHOWCASE SAILER BIZARRO LOGIC!
He is in 1st place in the league I run and is bitching because we have playoffs and there is a chance he could finish the regular season in first and lose in the playoffs.. He is in 7th place in Robb’s league and is bitching and I quote “RRRROBB WHY DON’T YOU HAVE PLAYOFFS LIKE MIKE’S LEAGUE?” Projected finish 9-8*
Grade A. He usually quits by week 6
*(Will quit in week 10)
The 6th place Bohemian Grove Boys
I have no idea what a Bohemian Grove Boy is but at least it doesn’t smack of Alliteration. Whatever a Bohemian Grove Boy is though, it could sure tickle my plums! Chris is in a position of sheer envy. Let me try to explain. He is in a place where isn’t supposed to be, and quite frankly has no business being there. Much like the White Cab Driver, or Colored Hockey Player or the fat stripper. Chris is out of place and loving it. You see his point total is Luddlodianly bad. Yet HE WINS THE MATCH-UP GAME! What sucks though is, whenever he wins he stays in the same spot. If he loses he goes crashing down to Davis land. He is dealing from a position of power with two good QB’s. He also has a pay subscription to thehuddle.com. What does it all mean? He is even Steven and will finish in sixth. Projected finish 9-8
Grade: B he is turning a sub par team into a winner.
The 5th Place Denver Milky Tnucs
Face the facts Milker, you are not a good fantasy owner, but you mange to stay competitive every year, only to have it all blow up in spectacular fashion in week 16. Is this the year Milker has somthin’ brand new for that ass? No but a 4th or 5th place finish does not seem out of the question. The biggest issue is whether not he blows his own penis off again with a series of lunatic trades. I will take you very seriously this week and you better hope none of these Pat Gillicks in the league decide to deal with me before Sunday.
Projected finish 10-7
Grade-B+ for knowing nothing about football you do very well against these GURU’s.
Jesus Christ, I WILL BE naming everyone’s team for them next year. Since the Radiation have never had the pleasure of winning anything its time to find a new name. How about ALGAR’s HALF-ORC TRIBE gameboy? The Radiation represent the Mason-Dixon line of THE LEAGUE OF EXTRAORDINARY CHUDS. If they win against Beaver they officially have become a non-slave state. Not to hammer on the present but once this guy started getting his pole smoked again he does stupid shit like not filling his roster (HELLO COLES AND GARDNER ON BYE WEEK!) Anyhow he’ll never amount to anything in his own league due to too much “meddling” and his penchant (also: proclivity or bent) for Saints. Projected finish 7-10. BTW
Record before woman moving in 3-0. Record after 0-4. WHAT A FLAMING PUSSY! You make Milkers whooped ass look like Peter North.
Grade- D
The 7th Place Steamboat Tuggers
Ahhhh. Sailer and Halloween the perfect match. I got some costume ideas for this human Jack O’Lantern. Instead of going as Gruden, how about Charles Bronsons stiff body, he has been in the ground about a week. His already leathery mug is probably at the same level of puke as yours is right now. You could also go as that guy who got hit in the face by acid. Leatherface form Texas Chainsaw Massacre is also a good choice. Speaking of massacres, how does this dimwit do it? He is 3rd in points and rotting in 7th place. One look at the cavalcade of failed running back might explain it.
NOW IS THE PART OF MONDAY NIGHT MATCH-UP WHERE WE SHOWCASE SAILER BIZARRO LOGIC!
He is in 1st place in the league I run and is bitching because we have playoffs and there is a chance he could finish the regular season in first and lose in the playoffs.. He is in 7th place in Robb’s league and is bitching and I quote “RRRROBB WHY DON’T YOU HAVE PLAYOFFS LIKE MIKE’S LEAGUE?” Projected finish 9-8*
Grade A. He usually quits by week 6
*(Will quit in week 10)
The 6th place Bohemian Grove Boys
I have no idea what a Bohemian Grove Boy is but at least it doesn’t smack of Alliteration. Whatever a Bohemian Grove Boy is though, it could sure tickle my plums! Chris is in a position of sheer envy. Let me try to explain. He is in a place where isn’t supposed to be, and quite frankly has no business being there. Much like the White Cab Driver, or Colored Hockey Player or the fat stripper. Chris is out of place and loving it. You see his point total is Luddlodianly bad. Yet HE WINS THE MATCH-UP GAME! What sucks though is, whenever he wins he stays in the same spot. If he loses he goes crashing down to Davis land. He is dealing from a position of power with two good QB’s. He also has a pay subscription to thehuddle.com. What does it all mean? He is even Steven and will finish in sixth. Projected finish 9-8
Grade: B he is turning a sub par team into a winner.
The 5th Place Denver Milky Tnucs
Face the facts Milker, you are not a good fantasy owner, but you mange to stay competitive every year, only to have it all blow up in spectacular fashion in week 16. Is this the year Milker has somthin’ brand new for that ass? No but a 4th or 5th place finish does not seem out of the question. The biggest issue is whether not he blows his own penis off again with a series of lunatic trades. I will take you very seriously this week and you better hope none of these Pat Gillicks in the league decide to deal with me before Sunday.
Projected finish 10-7
Grade-B+ for knowing nothing about football you do very well against these GURU’s.
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mikesherwin
The 4th Place Heinous Henchmen
Well, the Henchman. This is where we begin to separate wheat from the chafe. Or something life that. Fodge has made himself quite a nice little comeback despite his rumor mill offerings resembling some sort of Pig Latin off-shoot. This is the time of the year when Fodge is most deadly. Gardening, Canoeing and other things people do to try and makes themselves seem more “cultured (fucking annoying)” are out of season and he can put his full efforts in to fantasy football and planning the Colorado Association of Pea Growers Christmas Party. I will equate Fodge’s chances of winning the league against his chances of having a decent Halloween costume next week. Lets recap:
Cosmic Porcupine
Chef Death
Stolen Office Supplies taped to my body Guy.
The over-under on his costume cost this year- $2.41. If he exceeds this astronomical sum, I see a second place finish for him.
Grade- B it should be an I though with the inconsistent point totals he has generated
The 3rd Place Hammhocks
I admit it, I’ve been quite a nuisance all year. But I remember the old days when this was a bustling league of activity and rumor mill stabbings. Now it’s a bunch of bitter over 30’s who get grumpy with every insult, trade offer and mail it in on Sunday. MY third place start has me chomping at the bit though as I had a rough start last year only to unleash league dominance over the last 14 weeks. BUT I have a tougher climb this year, insulting everyone with reckless abandon has resulted in few trade partners. I believe it is because people are too scared to test their skilz against my vastly superior fantasy knowledge which was gained without a pay subscription to fatfantasywhiteguys.com. From now on I will only trade with people ahead of me in the standings which only leaves Zach and Kurt. Projected finish tie for second.
Grade B, not an A since I’ve lost to Henry and Luddy, but not a C since I’ve lost to all the doormats and still managed third place.
The 2nd Place Fantasy Gods
The fantasy gods are example number 2 that this league needs an enema. It seems anyone between the age of 30-34 has been come blinded with ineptitude. Zach’s youthful charm and diligent work on the waiver wire have resulted in a nice start despite missing a quarter of the season. Zach has constantly has the maximum amount of trades offered at all times and hates you all. Coupled with having the most points and a second place start, Zach is the team to beat.
Grade A+ he came in and started kicking ass and will win money. BTW you are a tremendous prick and I don’t like you.
The 1st Place Beaver Rules!
Good grief, this team name is getting a little old (much like Colville!!) but when you win money every year in every fantasy sport you could name your team I Suck Val Kilmer’s Dick and nobody could say shit. Colville likes as the kids say to “keep it real” and keep dirty thugs off his team. You won’t see Terrell Owens or Bill Romanowski on his team very long and I know it is destroying ever fiber of his being have to watch Randy Moss help him win games every week. While Colville has had the benefit of people putting high school girl basketball scores against him, he seems to always play the right chud on the right week (Chambers, Fiedler connection to throttle me in week 1). Projected finish tied for second, it will come down to points.
Grade A
Well, the Henchman. This is where we begin to separate wheat from the chafe. Or something life that. Fodge has made himself quite a nice little comeback despite his rumor mill offerings resembling some sort of Pig Latin off-shoot. This is the time of the year when Fodge is most deadly. Gardening, Canoeing and other things people do to try and makes themselves seem more “cultured (fucking annoying)” are out of season and he can put his full efforts in to fantasy football and planning the Colorado Association of Pea Growers Christmas Party. I will equate Fodge’s chances of winning the league against his chances of having a decent Halloween costume next week. Lets recap:
Cosmic Porcupine
Chef Death
Stolen Office Supplies taped to my body Guy.
The over-under on his costume cost this year- $2.41. If he exceeds this astronomical sum, I see a second place finish for him.
Grade- B it should be an I though with the inconsistent point totals he has generated
The 3rd Place Hammhocks
I admit it, I’ve been quite a nuisance all year. But I remember the old days when this was a bustling league of activity and rumor mill stabbings. Now it’s a bunch of bitter over 30’s who get grumpy with every insult, trade offer and mail it in on Sunday. MY third place start has me chomping at the bit though as I had a rough start last year only to unleash league dominance over the last 14 weeks. BUT I have a tougher climb this year, insulting everyone with reckless abandon has resulted in few trade partners. I believe it is because people are too scared to test their skilz against my vastly superior fantasy knowledge which was gained without a pay subscription to fatfantasywhiteguys.com. From now on I will only trade with people ahead of me in the standings which only leaves Zach and Kurt. Projected finish tie for second.
Grade B, not an A since I’ve lost to Henry and Luddy, but not a C since I’ve lost to all the doormats and still managed third place.
The 2nd Place Fantasy Gods
The fantasy gods are example number 2 that this league needs an enema. It seems anyone between the age of 30-34 has been come blinded with ineptitude. Zach’s youthful charm and diligent work on the waiver wire have resulted in a nice start despite missing a quarter of the season. Zach has constantly has the maximum amount of trades offered at all times and hates you all. Coupled with having the most points and a second place start, Zach is the team to beat.
Grade A+ he came in and started kicking ass and will win money. BTW you are a tremendous prick and I don’t like you.
The 1st Place Beaver Rules!
Good grief, this team name is getting a little old (much like Colville!!) but when you win money every year in every fantasy sport you could name your team I Suck Val Kilmer’s Dick and nobody could say shit. Colville likes as the kids say to “keep it real” and keep dirty thugs off his team. You won’t see Terrell Owens or Bill Romanowski on his team very long and I know it is destroying ever fiber of his being have to watch Randy Moss help him win games every week. While Colville has had the benefit of people putting high school girl basketball scores against him, he seems to always play the right chud on the right week (Chambers, Fiedler connection to throttle me in week 1). Projected finish tied for second, it will come down to points.
Grade A
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Ice Cream Jonsey
- Posts: 30451
- Joined: Sat Apr 27, 2002 2:44 pm
- Location: Colorado
- Contact:
Here's a helpful key:
San Jose Rousseres: Gabe "Luddy" Roussere
Jenna Bush's Bush: Henry Jeanes
Against All Odds: Matt "Bundy" Davis
Alberquerque Alchies: Da King
Rochester Radiation: ICJ
Steamboat Tuggers: "Coach" Bryan Sailer
Denver Milky Tnucs: the Milker
Bohemien Grove Boys: Chris "Danzaland" Monahan
Heinous Henchmen: Aaron Fodge
Hammhocks: Mike Sherwin
Fantasy Gods: Matt Randall & Zach
Beaver Rules: Kurt Colville
San Jose Rousseres: Gabe "Luddy" Roussere
Jenna Bush's Bush: Henry Jeanes
Against All Odds: Matt "Bundy" Davis
Alberquerque Alchies: Da King
Rochester Radiation: ICJ
Steamboat Tuggers: "Coach" Bryan Sailer
Denver Milky Tnucs: the Milker
Bohemien Grove Boys: Chris "Danzaland" Monahan
Heinous Henchmen: Aaron Fodge
Hammhocks: Mike Sherwin
Fantasy Gods: Matt Randall & Zach
Beaver Rules: Kurt Colville
the dark and gritty...Ice Cream Jonsey!