The JC Grand Theft Auto: Vice City Thread

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

Anyone else pick this up for the PC yet?

Still no save anywhere.

It's 2002 all over again.

[bruce]

Anyone else pick this up for the PC yet?

Still no save anywhere.

It's 2002 all over again.

Yeah, it is all that.

But I'm enjoying it.

I do think it's FUCKING STUPID to go to VICE CITY and have NO IDEA how to SWIM.

I mean, I drove my motorcycle into SOME DUDE'S POOL and DROWNED. Which was pretty sad.

I like the motorcycles. And I know that MONKEY MONKEY is going to have something to say about this, but the "Faggio" scooter is REALLY fun to ride. I had a great time yesterday riding it up and down the beach and doing donuts. And then I fell off, and I knew that the bikini chicks around there were laughing at me, so I beat them to death with my golf club.

Like GTA3, the best part of this game isn't doing the missions (and Tex Avery's RC Helicopter Fun is a bitch), but driving around aimlessly being bad.

I wish there were more new or different cars. Almost everythng here, except for the bikes, I've driven before in GTA3. The Sentinel XS (used to be the Mafia Sentinel) is still a great all-around car, the Cheetah is only slightly inferior to the Banshee is only a little inferior to the Infernus.... And the new cars aren't anyuthing special. The Hermes and the Oceanic are basically boats with really soft steering and stability problems at speed; that Porsche-looking thing might as well be a Banshee; and I still can't find a Maibatsu Monstrosity. This is offset by the Sanchez bike, which I insist on thinking of as the Dirty Sanchez. I had a great deal of fun popping a wheelie down the road on one, until I wiped out and the bike flipped over on top of me. Ow.

Bruce

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

See, those are all good points. I should be nodding my head in agreement and that should be that.

But the dumb fuckers who slopped this thing together remove your fucking ride when you go get new clothes (and doing so is mandatory). Does putting a new skin on the PC mean that they have to flush where all the objects are in RAM? Christ, these guys are terrible at their jobs.

[bruce]

But the dumb fuckers who slopped this thing together remove your fucking ride when you go get new clothes (and doing so is mandatory). Does putting a new skin on the PC mean that they have to flush where all the objects are in RAM? Christ, these guys are terrible at their jobs.

On the one hand, I nod my head in agreement.

On the other hand, I say, "well, shit. Just steal another car," because hey, there's always one around.

On the third hand, this sort of ham-handed plot advancement is pretty annoying. In the Cortez mission that lets you get missions from Diaz, for instance, you can park Lance's Infernus wherever you want--or steal another car, and park it wherever you want--but the friggin' game *still* makes you chase down the Cuban with the fucking bike they give you because god forbid you should want to just wait for him to emerge from the alley and then RUN HIS ASS OVER, no you MUST GO SHOOT HIM FROM THE MOTORCYCLE.

Same thing with the Frog in the Mall; I tried riding my motorcycle up the escalator so I could hunt him down more easily. Alas, whoosh, it vanished out from under me.

Bruce

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

On the one hand, I nod my head in agreement.

On the other hand, I say, "well, shit. Just steal another car," because hey, there's always one around.

Get a load of this, though --

I accepted the first payphone mission. I have to kill a guy delivering pizzas before he delivers them all. I have 50 "pizzas" until the mission is up. This is just their mealy-mouthed way of avoiding a timer here. They didn't fool anybody.

Anyway, after the cut-scene my bike has been deleted. IT WAS RIGHT NEXT TO THE GODDAMN PHONE.

From 50 "pizzas" until 36 "pizzas" I was unable to find another fucking car. Yes, in "Grand Theft Auto" everyone apparently decided to turn in for the night. Oh, right, at about 40 I did see a police car. Hahahahah!

I didn't kill the guy, of course. I HAD a bike going into the mission that would keep up with him, but I had to go drive some Oldsmobile-wannabe instead (the car I found at the 36 pizza interval). Then, after the game told me he delivered all his pizzas (no delivering animation, of course, no him-stopping-the-bike animation, of course) the game had the audacity to remove him from my fucking radar and then flush him from the RAM cache.

I already hate this fucking game. If anything, it's worse than GTA3, because they didn't even have the good sense to wait a bit before pulling this annoying shit.

Is there a mall in this game? That's this game's only hope right now.

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

Like GTA3, the best part of this game isn't doing the missions (and Tex Avery's RC Helicopter Fun is a bitch), but driving around aimlessly being bad.

Seven minutes to completely learn a new game. These guys are the dumbest batch of game designers ever assembled for a single team.

Someday I want to make a first person shooter. In the middle of it, I am going to totally turn it into a real-time strategy game. And if you don't completely master the nuances of real-time strategy within SEVEN MINUTES, well, hahaha, you lose the mission and your progress.

I love how they show a C64 load screen in the title screen. They have to go back to 1983 to find a time where other games were made that didn't let you save anywhere.

[bruce]

Someday I want to make a first person shooter. In the middle of it, I am going to totally turn it into a real-time strategy game. And if you don't completely master the nuances of real-time strategy within SEVEN MINUTES, well, hahaha, you lose the mission and your progress.

I love how they show a C64 load screen in the title screen. They have to go back to 1983 to find a time where other games were made that didn't let you save anywhere.

Yeah, your points are good.

But.....

Driving the "Faggio" scooter around and bludgeoning prostitutes with golf clubs!

Plus--and maybe it was just an oversight--I really liked how you could get around the security gate in the golf course by parking a car next to the fence, jumping on your car and then over the fence, and then shooting the guy you were supposed to beat.

Bruce

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

What was the deal with the security camera there? I walked right through and had no problems until I got to the driving range.

I think for this thread I'll just detail what I found ridiculous about the game and leave it at that. I'll then write up a JC-only review with all these things and let the reader pass judgment for him/herself. Actually, I'll throw it on Krips. Give that baby a workout again.

Didn't know you could use the golf club while on the scooter. That's cool. That's what's so frustrating about this game: there is more cool stuff per square inch than in almost any other game(s) ever... it's just the missions which so spectacularly fail to work.

[Protagonist X]

That's what's so frustrating about this game: there is more cool stuff per square inch than in almost any other game(s) ever... it's just the missions which so spectacularly fail to work.

This is nearly identical to the thoughts I had on Shenmue. If you're still planning on posting things to RFTK, I'll try to clean up the review I wrote. I found two hunks of it, and I suspect a different server at work has the third.

[bruce]

Didn't know you could use the golf club while on the scooter.

Alas, you can't.

I resorted to the club after I fell off the scooter doing donuts.

After I picked myself up off the beach, I *knew* those hobags were laughing at me. So I killed them.

Bruce

[bruce]

I've just figured out the way to play GTA:VC.

Roll-your-own Scenarios.

I just created one I call "Soccer Dad."

Step 1: Steal a minivan
Step 2: Go to Ammu-Nation and buy a first-person targeting weapon, like the Kruger
Step 3: Drive the minivan back to the Lighthouse
Step 4: Climb halfway up the lighthouse, go out, and perch on the ledge.
Step 5: Start picking off peds. Give yourself bonus points for headshots. Go slowly so you never get more than one star, and let it expire.
Step 6: Continue till you run out of ammo.

I feel SO much better now.

Bruce

[Worm]

My little brother has this game for the PS2 .. I simply cannot bring myself to play it. I tried GTA and just did not enjoy it. I tried GTA:VC and enjoyed it just as little thorougly and truely.

[Lex]

Y'know, the guys who made this game live all-of a 1/4 of a mile away -- want me to go do somethin'?

[Jack Straw]

Rockstar is UK?

Little factoid: GTA 3 and vice city for PS2 were not released in Japan, although 1 and 2 were. Making it one of the most imported PS2 titles ever.

[Guest]

"Rockstar North" are the guys that do GTA3. The work a few blocks away.

[Lex 2 -- THE RETURRRRN!!!]

Note: Only Edinburgh-based company worth knowing about IN THE WHOLE WORLD; and they're the only ones who wouldn't answer my e-males :(

Mails.

HEheeheh

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

Note: Only Edinburgh-based company worth knowing about IN THE WHOLE WORLD; and they're the only ones who wouldn't answer my e-males :(
Mails.
HEheeheh

they r 2 busy snortin coke

[Lex]

LOL.