I'm in love with Eugenie Bouchard.

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Thu Jul 03, 2014 11:42 am

She's like a super-hot KILLER TENNIS ROBOT, while all of her competitors are shrieking, hysterical drama queens, and she goes out and quietly, stoically stomps them on the face.

Tdarcos · Post by **Tdarcos** » Thu Jul 03, 2014 4:22 pm

pinback wrote:She's like a super-hot KILLER TENNIS ROBOT, while all of her competitors are shrieking, hysterical drama queens, and she goes out and quietly, stoically stomps them on the face.

Better hope your better half doesn't hear about this, or you might expect to be writing a large alimony check each month...

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Thu Jul 03, 2014 4:29 pm

Tdarcos wrote:
pinback wrote:She's like a super-hot KILLER TENNIS ROBOT, while all of her competitors are shrieking, hysterical drama queens, and she goes out and quietly, stoically stomps them on the face.
Better hope your better half doesn't hear about this, or you might expect to be writing a large alimony check each month...

This is a terrible post, that isn't remotely funny and that nobody will enjoy.

Why do you keep writing terrible posts that aren't remotely funny and that nobody enjoys?

Ice Cream Jonsey · Post by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Thu Jul 03, 2014 8:52 pm

Tdarcos wrote:
pinback wrote:She's like a super-hot KILLER TENNIS ROBOT, while all of her competitors are shrieking, hysterical drama queens, and she goes out and quietly, stoically stomps them on the face.
Better hope your better half doesn't hear about this, or you might expect to be writing a large alimony check each month...

That chick is absolutely fucking gorgeous. Jesus Christ, women get better-looking every year.

Paul, Pinback and his wife have an agreement, they are both allowed to pick fruit from the tour.

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Thu Jul 03, 2014 9:17 pm

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:
Tdarcos wrote:
pinback wrote:She's like a super-hot KILLER TENNIS ROBOT, while all of her competitors are shrieking, hysterical drama queens, and she goes out and quietly, stoically stomps them on the face.
Better hope your better half doesn't hear about this, or you might expect to be writing a large alimony check each month...
That chick is absolutely fucking gorgeous. Jesus Christ, women get better-looking every year.

Paul, Pinback and his wife have an agreement, they are both allowed to pick fruit from the tour.

No, she gets one guy she'd rather be with (Stephen Amell), and I'm (I'm assuming) allowed one chick. That chick is:

EUGENIE FUCKING BOUCHARD.

She's the Tiger Woods of tennis, except less of an asshole.

(So far.)

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Thu Jul 03, 2014 9:20 pm

Christ, I would WRECK that chick.

And by WRECK, I mean destroy any sense of self-worth and joie de vivre with my systematic attack of emotional abuse and alcoholism.

Flack · Post by **Flack** » Thu Jul 03, 2014 10:32 pm

Likes:

- Self-confidence
- Hiking
- Zumba
- Guys on C-PAP Machines

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Fri Jul 04, 2014 8:02 am

Flack wrote:Likes:

- Self-confidence
- Hiking
- Zumba
- Guys on C-PAP Machines

This couldn't be going better!!

Tdarcos · Post by **Tdarcos** » Fri Jul 04, 2014 4:09 pm

pinback wrote:
Tdarcos wrote:
pinback wrote:She's like a super-hot KILLER TENNIS ROBOT, while all of her competitors are shrieking, hysterical drama queens, and she goes out and quietly, stoically stomps them on the face.
Better hope your better half doesn't hear about this, or you might expect to be writing a large alimony check each month...
This is a terrible post, that isn't remotely funny and that nobody will enjoy.

So you say. Not that necessarily other people will agree with you, but that's what you say.

Why do you keep writing terrible posts that aren't remotely funny and that nobody enjoys?

Why did you keep promising the Don Rogers show would return after retooling, and then take 14 fucking months to reease a new episode?

Larry King, you're not. Even when Dick Clark was over 70, he was still able to the annual New Years Eve event. Jesus, the guy was at least 20 years older than you and was still able to put a show on more often than you can.

Ice Cream Jonsey · Post by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Fri Jul 04, 2014 11:01 pm

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Sat Jul 05, 2014 4:19 am

Tdarcos wrote:
pinback wrote:
Tdarcos wrote: Better hope your better half doesn't hear about this, or you might expect to be writing a large alimony check each month...
This is a terrible post, that isn't remotely funny and that nobody will enjoy.
So you say. Not that necessarily other people will agree with you, but that's what you say.

If anyone reading this does NOT agree with me, please let us know.

WAIT FOR IT: <<crickets>>

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Sat Jul 05, 2014 4:21 am

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:

omg twins:

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Sat Jul 05, 2014 6:55 am

Well, she's getting her sweet Canadian ass handed to her in the Wimbledon finals. I feel like all of this attention we put on her made her nervous.

Tdarcos · Post by **Tdarcos** » Sat Jul 05, 2014 8:30 am

pinback wrote:Well, she's getting her sweet Canadian ass handed to her in the Wimbledon finals. I feel like all of this attention we put on her made her nervous.

Oh please. Being seen by the public is part of the "cost of doing business" for a professional sports player, and you take it as being something that comes with the territory. (For guys it's often a great source of young groupies for tawdry one-night-stands.)

Being seen by millions of people didn't prevent Tiger Woods from being able to be a very good golf player. Getting attacked by his (now ex-) wife for cheating on him and running his Mercedes into a fire hydrant, on the other hand...

To put it bluntly, I strongly expect most sports players, if they're any good, either don't notice the audience or put it out of their consciousness. It's the also rans that make excuses for their failures, other than simply "I wasn't very good that day," or "I sucked."

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Sat Jul 05, 2014 9:17 am

Tdarcos wrote:
pinback wrote:Well, she's getting her sweet Canadian ass handed to her in the Wimbledon finals. I feel like all of this attention we put on her made her nervous.
Oh please. Being seen by the public is part of the "cost of doing business" for a professional sports player, and you take it as being something that comes with the territory. (For guys it's often a great source of young groupies for tawdry one-night-stands.)

I suggested that we here at Jolt Country made her nervous. This was obviously a joke. Sorry, I meant obviously to everybody in the entire world except the ONE GUY WHO HAS NEVER, AND WILL NEVER, UNDERSTAND JOKES.

(That's you! I'm talking about you here, Paul!)

Eugenie Bouchard · Post by **Eugenie Bouchard** » Sat Jul 05, 2014 9:50 am

Hey guys! Just taking a few seconds off between matches to let you all know that Tdarcos was right. This thread did not affect my play at Wimbledon. Carry on!

I'm in love with Eugenie Bouchard.

I'm in love with Eugenie Bouchard.

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