Pinback answer for your crime

Ice Cream Jonsey · Post by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Mon Jan 21, 2013 8:37 pm

Pinback thinks "Escape from New York" sucks, and I demand to know why to my satisfaction.

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Mon Jan 21, 2013 10:13 pm

I can't say it any better than this clip of a review I found on MRQE:

Like much of the oeuvre of hackmeister supreme John Carpenter, Escape from New York is a far better film if you leave the gloss of nostalgia around it intact. Translation: I remember it being a lot better than it actually is. So if you have fond memories of a long-ago viewing of EFNY, I'd suggest not ruining them by revisiting the film again.

And it's not that I'm holding EFNY to a particularly high standard. This is a film, like everything Carpenter has done with the exception of Starman, that is schlock: pure, simple, unabashed, unapologetic schlock. But I recall it as being schlock that was a helluva lot more fun than it is.

Ice Cream Jonsey · Post by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Mon Jan 21, 2013 11:35 pm

Yes, The Thing is schlock. That dumbfuck Internet reviewer has it right. How could I be so stupid to disagree with him.

That guy is a piece of shit and it doesn't say much about you that you quoted him.

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Tue Jan 22, 2013 6:05 am

Alright, I guess we're not having conversations in 2013. 2013 is the year Jonsey just tells us all why we're idiots.

Who's next?

Tdarcos · Post by **Tdarcos** » Tue Jan 22, 2013 7:24 am

Escape From New York was fairly good - although the premise, that they evacuated Manhattan Island and turned it into a prison wouldn't work - while Escape From L.A. was the typical rip-off sequel used to cash-in on the buzz from the (much better) first movie.

I can think of very few movies where the sequel equaled or exceeded the original. Star Trek II is one of these. Maybe some of the Star Wars sequels. Not many films meet this high standard.

Carpenter did a terrific job on the original Assault on Precinct 13. No major actors, had to do everything as cheaply as possible (because he and the two producers were financing it out of their own pockets) and yet the story itself works quite well for the time.

[Why the premise for EFNY doesn't work in the next message.]

Tdarcos · Post by **Tdarcos** » Tue Jan 22, 2013 7:25 am

[Why the premise from Escape From New York doesn't work, continued from previous message.]

One of the things you can argue is that no matter how bad the economy was that they needed a huge place for a prison, Manhattan Island has way too much expensive infrastructure to just abandon it. From the entire east-coast AT&T switching matrix and the primary interconnect for international calls to Europe, to, if nothing else, the World Trade Center, plus all the other buildings. Call it a trillion dollars in 1970s money. Be a whole lot cheaper to buy Greenland from the Danes if you just want an island mass, or else just dig a moat out of sand and stuff everyone in the Arizona desert or move Area 51 someplace else and put them there.

CO · Post by CO » Tue Jan 22, 2013 10:08 am

This is a film, like everything Carpenter has done with the exception of Starman, that is schlock: pure, simple, unabashed, unapologetic schlock.

Starman is schlock too.

AArdvark · Post by **AArdvark** » Tue Jan 22, 2013 5:05 pm

What did they do with all the people living in Manhattan when they turned it into a prison? I can't imagine that Sarah Jessica Parker would leave all those shoe stores behind...

THE
SEX AND THE
AARDVARK

Ice Cream Jonsey · Post by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Tue Jan 22, 2013 10:07 pm

CO wrote:
This is a film, like everything Carpenter has done with the exception of Starman, that is schlock: pure, simple, unabashed, unapologetic schlock.
Starman is schlock too.

Of course it is - Transformers and Battleship are GOOD, Looper and Starman are SCHLOCK.

This has been... Casual Observer's House of Movie Poon!

RetroR · Post by **RetroR** » Wed Jan 23, 2013 7:02 am

And there goes everyone's resolution to be less negative in 2013.

co · Post by co » Wed Jan 23, 2013 11:14 am

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:Of course it is - Transformers and Battleship are GOOD, Looper and Starman are SCHLOCK.

This has been... Casual Observer's House of Movie Poon!

Transformers kicks Looper's ass all over the screen. I'm quite sure nobody cheered in the theater when anybody did anything in Looper - win: Transformers.

Battleship wasn't good, just a somewhat unique approach to putting a two dimensional board game into a modern set movie, and a hot chick.

Starman was a pointless sappy waste of an hour and a half, Jeff Bridges should be ashamed.

The Bad Opinion Fairy · Wed Jan 23, 2013 11:28 am

co wrote:
Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:Of course it is - Transformers and Battleship are GOOD, Looper and Starman are SCHLOCK.

This has been... Casual Observer's House of Movie Poon!
Transformers kicks Looper's ass all over the screen. I'm quite sure nobody cheered in the theater when anybody did anything in Looper - win: Transformers.

Battleship wasn't good, just a somewhat unique approach to putting a two dimensional board game into a modern set movie, and a hot chick.

Starman was a pointless sappy waste of an hour and a half, Jeff Bridges should be ashamed.

BAD OPINIONS!!