Pinback should like this: Shit the Bed 12/10 Hot Sauce

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Tdarcos
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Pinback should like this: Shit the Bed 12/10 Hot Sauce

Post by Tdarcos » Fri Jul 26, 2019 9:45 pm

Amazon is sellingBunsters Shit The Bed 12/10 Heat Hot Sauce - Chili Pepper Sauce which is rated at 35,000 Scoville units, or about 700% of the heat of a jalapeño. I'm not kidding about the name.

DO NOT SEND ME ANY HOT SAUCE. THE BOTTLE WILL GO IN THE TRASH UNOPENED. I TELL YOU THREE TIMES.
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Re: Pinback should like this: Shit the Bed 12/10 Hot Sauce

Post by Ice Cream Jonsey » Fri Jul 26, 2019 10:36 pm

Are you fascinated by the rich history around hot sauces, even though you don't partake yourself?
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Re: Pinback should like this: Shit the Bed 12/10 Hot Sauce

Post by pinback » Sun Jul 28, 2019 6:15 am

I'd actually seen this, by way of this very Amazon page. A couple notes:

1. I've never had it, and never seen it outside of Amazon. Paul, if you want to gift me a copy, I will make a review video for you.

2. I don't care for vulgarities in hot sauce names. It's not cute, it's not funny, and MOST of the sauces with such names are crap just put on the market as a goof. This doesn't look like crap, though, so I'm willing to overlook it.

3. "12/10" is VERY excessive for 35,000 scoville sauce. Christ, the bottle of Reapercussion that Jonsey bought is definitely above 35,000, and he drinks that crap faster than milk the day before it expires.

So, to sum up, the marketing around this sauce is very sketchy, but the reviews and ingredient lists make it seem like it could be great. And once Paul buys me it, I will make a review video for him.
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Re: Pinback should like this: Shit the Bed 12/10 Hot Sauce

Post by Tdarcos » Sun Jul 28, 2019 7:30 am

pinback wrote:
Sun Jul 28, 2019 6:15 am
I'd actually seen this, by way of this very Amazon page. A couple notes:

1. I've never had it, and never seen it outside of Amazon. Paul, if you want to gift me a copy, I will make a review video for you
First, despite repeated requests, I have never recieved your contsct information for my Emergncy Contact List, so I could not send you anything. (More than once I've posted a public request for information and did not receive any reples.)
And once Paul buys me it, I will make a review video for him.
Did you forget that because of Medicare reimbursement rules, the nursing home I'm in takes all of my SSDI except for $40? Do you really expect me to spend $18 on a bottle of hot sauce when all I have is $40 a month? If I had $18 to waste I'd buy two bags of Starburst® in order to satisfy my genetuclly modified food fix.

Oh, and the Starburst® gummis do not have the GMO warning.


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Re: Pinback should like this: Shit the Bed 12/10 Hot Sauce

Post by Tdarcos » Sun Jul 28, 2019 7:39 am

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:
Fri Jul 26, 2019 10:36 pm
Are you fascinated by the rich history around hot sauces, even though you don't partake yourself?
I just thought it was funny that someone would name a product something you can't say on TV or radio.


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Re: Pinback should like this: Shit the Bed 12/10 Hot Sauce

Post by Ice Cream Jonsey » Sun Jul 28, 2019 8:51 am

pinback wrote:
Sun Jul 28, 2019 6:15 am
So, to sum up, the marketing around this sauce is very sketchy, but the reviews and ingredient lists make it seem like it could be great. And once Paul buys me it, I will make a review video for him.
!!! That's kind of him to do that. As a lifetime teetoler, I was not aware that he'd be in the "buying curse word hot sauce" biz, but here we are.
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Re: Pinback should like this: Shit the Bed 12/10 Hot Sauce

Post by Ice Cream Jonsey » Sun Jul 28, 2019 8:52 am

Tdarcos wrote:
Sun Jul 28, 2019 7:30 am
Do you really expect me to spend $18 on a bottle of hot sauce when all I have is $40 a month?
Oh. Here we aren't, it seems.
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Re: Pinback should like this: Shit the Bed 12/10 Hot Sauce

Post by AArdvark » Sun Jul 28, 2019 9:28 am

Yeah but he's cut his footwear bills in half recently

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Re: Pinback should like this: Shit the Bed 12/10 Hot Sauce

Post by pinback » Sun Jul 28, 2019 6:24 pm

Am I getting the goddamn hot sauce or what? I just moved my office upstairs, and within 3 minutes, the bunny in here had already eaten my keyboard cord, forcing me to dig out a replacement keyboard which I think was a toy in a Happy Meal at some point.

At this rate, the video camera cord will be dead by the weekend, so if we want this video to happen, we need to step on it.
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Re: Pinback should like this: Shit the Bed 12/10 Hot Sauce

Post by Casual Observer » Sun Jul 28, 2019 10:16 pm

pinback wrote:
Sun Jul 28, 2019 6:24 pm
the bunny in here had already eaten my keyboard cord
oh, God, do you have a rabbit too? I'm so sorry for you if so. Rabbits are the worst pet that can be imagined.

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Re: Pinback should like this: Shit the Bed 12/10 Hot Sauce

Post by Tdarcos » Mon Jul 29, 2019 3:02 am

pinback wrote:
Sun Jul 28, 2019 6:24 pm
Am I getting the goddamn hot sauce or what?
Ar you really this stupid or did you get lessons on how to be a moron? I have $40 a month to manage on, which has to cover bills I sometimes get and provide something extra for me. I'm certin your employer pays you enough that you can, to paraphrase Major Grant in Die Hard 2:

"If you remember me, Pinback... ...then you remember I know the drill as well as you do. Buy your own fuckin' hot sauce."

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Re: Pinback should like this: Shit the Bed 12/10 Hot Sauce

Post by pinback » Mon Jul 29, 2019 5:11 am

Just let me know when it's going to get here, so I can have the video stuff set up and ready to go.
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Re: Pinback should like this: Shit the Bed 12/10 Hot Sauce

Post by pinback » Mon Jul 29, 2019 3:02 pm

How's that order coming? If it's out for delivery, let me know, because I gotta catch the delivery guy before he rings the doorbell or all the animals go nuts.
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Re: Pinback should like this: Shit the Bed 12/10 Hot Sauce

Post by Ice Cream Jonsey » Mon Jul 29, 2019 7:20 pm

Of course the Commander sent it. He has $40 plus one free Amazon order to live on, and he decided to make the hot sauce his one Amazon order.

BY THE WAY, so I tried Reapercussion for the first time without any sort of sour cream or tse-tse-ki sauce. I fuckin' DIED. I am a dead man right now, the Reapercussion just hasn't left my writhing body.
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Re: Pinback should like this: Shit the Bed 12/10 Hot Sauce

Post by pinback » Tue Jul 30, 2019 4:06 am

Now that's a 12/10 sauce right there.
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Re: Pinback should like this: Shit the Bed 12/10 Hot Sauce

Post by Tdarcos » Tue Jul 30, 2019 3:04 pm

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:
Mon Jul 29, 2019 7:20 pm
plus one free Amazon order to live on,
What the [expletive deleted] are you talking about? What "one free Amazon® order?" If somebody was going to give me a free Amazon order, I'd see what the limit was and order accordingly. Not order somerhing for someone that's been rude and nasty to me.

And if Pinback was serious, he would have to have PMed, text messaged or e-mailed me his address, which he has not done. Or he'd have said to send it to Benjamin Parrish, General Delivery, Denver CO 80001 or whatever city and Zip Code® he lives in. He has done none of these, proving the whole thing was a sick joke from a sick fuck.

This reminds me of when I first met Andrea and wanred to send her something. She was afraid to tell me her address (I found out later she had recently come out of a bad relationship). I said that's ok, all I need is the city and zip code of any nearby post office and could send it General Delivery. She had never heard of it, and was surprised when she could go to the post office, show her driver's license, and just pick up something like that.
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Re: Pinback should like this: Shit the Bed 12/10 Hot Sauce

Post by Tdarcos » Tue Jul 30, 2019 3:10 pm

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:
Mon Jul 29, 2019 7:20 pm
I fuckin' DIED. I am a dead man right now, the Reapercussion just hasn't left my writhing body.
LOOK OUT EVERYBODY! DEAD MAN TYPING! GANGWAY, DEAD MAN TYPING THIS WAY...
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Re: Pinback should like this: Shit the Bed 12/10 Hot Sauce

Post by bryanb » Tue Jul 30, 2019 4:21 pm

Hey Ben, would you be willing to write a new IF review in exchange for some hot sauce? If the Liberty Township address on your White Pages entry is accurate, I can get the product moving very quickly. Just say the word.

If RFTK were to relaunch today, the content on offer would consist of three new reviews from me and a "Hello World" post from Robb. Yes, that's the result of three months of "work." To say I'm starting to get alarmed is an understatement. If this hot sauce for reviews scheme doesn't work, my sole backup strategy is to go back to sending nag emails to Retroromper that are probably only ending up in his spam folder.

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Re: Pinback should like this: Shit the Bed 12/10 Hot Sauce

Post by pinback » Wed Jul 31, 2019 5:37 am

Are there any HOT NEW IF GAMES that are aching for the Trotting Krip treatment?
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Re: Pinback should like this: Shit the Bed 12/10 Hot Sauce

Post by bryanb » Wed Jul 31, 2019 2:08 pm

pinback wrote:
Wed Jul 31, 2019 5:37 am
Are there any HOT NEW IF GAMES that are aching for the Trotting Krip treatment?
That's a good question. The finalists for this year's XYZZY Awards have been announced so that might be a good place to start. I checked out exactly one new game listed in the first round voting which turned out to be short, shitty, and written in Twine which to a certain extent seems to be par for the course these days. I'm pleased to see it's been weeded out before the finals, and happily there are parser games in contention for multiple awards (though they're still outnumbered). Probably the game I'm most interested in checking out that I haven't played yet is Cragne Manor, a tribute to Anchorhead with a ridiculous number of coauthors. I'm guessing it's a bit of a mess, but perhaps it's a glorious one? Anyone else have any suggestions?

When we started RFTK originally, I did primarily want to focus on new IF reviews, but now I'm just as happy to mine the decades of IF history. One thing I'm doing at the moment is going back and specifically playing all the games that finished dead last in the competition. Even though I tend to reflexively distrust competition voters, I was surprised to find out I had never actually played many of the last place finishers. Predictably, I'm finding I both loathe and enjoy some of the games. Much as I hate to admit it, the comp voters aren't ALWAYS wrong. I'm still bitter over the 1999 results, though: 31st place for Chicks Dig Jerks when the even more buggy Four Seconds finishes 15th?

Ben, I'm going to send you a PM with the URL for the new work-in-progress Trotting Krips site as I'm not sure you've seen it yet. If anyone else wants to check it out in its current rough form, let me know.

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