Jolt Country

Wow. Visually, perhaps the most stunning space movie ever (2001 included). There was no part of the film during which I did not believe the actors were in zero gravity and in danger. I had to dry my palms off more than once -- this film is seriously 90 minutes of stress-inducing cinema.

It may be the best movie I've ever seen. Certainly the best movie I've ever seen in a theater.

Gravity hasn't usurped that title for me, but my "best theater experiences" are tied between Congo & Pacific Rim (more for personal reasons than theatrical, but there you go).

The worst you ask? Being completely burnt out at a midnight showing of Return of the King. Having a "not quite the ending!" motif is all fun and dandy, except if you've already been sitting in line for six hours to watch a three and a half hour film.

CONGO? You are comparing Gravity to CONGO?

What is this? What are you doing? I want you to explain yourself right now. Gravity was an inferior experience to Congo. This had better be the case because you were at the premiere of Congo, and you spent the entire runtime barebacking Laura Linney.

Is that the Congo with the talking monkey?


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AARDVARK

We can't really compare the entire experience, can we? I mean, saying that Karate Kid Part III was the greatest in the series because some homeless guy gave you a hand job halfway through the third act doesn't really make it a better movie than, oh, Karate Kid Part II, does it?

"Wax up, wax down."

My favorite theater experiences in no particular order.

Seeing Faces of Death 4 in a theater and hearing the crowd go into shock during the "cooking a puppy" segment.

The Amazing Spiderman in IMAX 3D. In IMAX 3D that movie was a jaw dropper. One of the few times that 3D absolutely made a movie better. I'd imagine this is what seeing Gravity in IMAX 3D is like.

Seeing Robocop with my parents and having my dad start passing out during the scene where Alex Murphy got killed.

Nearly getting into a fist fight over Cloverfield.

At Batman Begins, watching a girl try to step over a row of seats, carrying popcorn and a coke, clip her foot and fall face first into her popcorn and coke on the floor.

Seeing Misery at an all black theater. When James Caan walks into the restaurant at the end somebody yelled "HOW HE WALKING ON THEM CHICKEN FEET???"

Friday the 13th 2009. I got so angry at the movie I obnoxiously booed and laughed at it and annoyed everybody in the theater.

My first and only walk out: The first Matrix sequel. I later found out I walked out with only 2 minutes left in the movie.

Grindhouse. Two fun, goofy movies and a bunch of awesome fake trailers for the price of one?? It was an awesome throwback to the good ol' days. That project's failure makes me absolutely sick. How do you not go see 2 movies, by Robert Rodriguez and Tarantino(!!!!!!!!!), for the price of 1?? If that had worked Hollywood would've seen doing special stuff like that was worth it and we would've got more like it. The most sickening part is that people decided to spend the same price to see "Are We There Yet?" that weekend instead of seeing TWO movies.

Backing into somebody's car after the midnight premiere of Spawn then racing away as they chased after me on foot.

But the best theater experience is every single time I sat down alone in a theater and nobody else showed up and I got to enjoy it by myself.

Flack wrote:We can't really compare the entire experience, can we? I mean, saying that Karate Kid Part III was the greatest in the series because some homeless guy gave you a hand job halfway through the third act doesn't really make it a better movie than, oh, Karate Kid Part II, does it?

"Wax up, wax down."

Yes. We CAN compare. If someone fucked you during a bad movie, then that's your best theater experience.

I've made out at movies and probably sucked on a tit, but I can do that any time now. I can't ever see a good 3D movie which, frankly, I thought would NEVER happen.

lethargic wrote:Nearly getting into a fist fight over Cloverfield.

Oh! What happened? I would love to know more!

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:

Flack wrote:We can't really compare the entire experience, can we? I mean, saying that Karate Kid Part III was the greatest in the series because some homeless guy gave you a hand job halfway through the third act doesn't really make it a better movie than, oh, Karate Kid Part II, does it?

"Wax up, wax down."

Yes. We CAN compare. If someone fucked you during a bad movie, then that's your best theater experience.

Wouldn't you admit that we all got fucked during Karate Kid Part III?

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:

lethargic wrote:Nearly getting into a fist fight over Cloverfield.

Oh! What happened? I would love to know more!

I don't exactly what was said anymore, but I had been, shockingly, arguing with this guy on the internet. I was all super excited about the movie and this guy was saying the movie sucks. Before he had seen it. Which puts me into a rage state. He said it sucks because of JJ Abrams.

It's one thing to hate Abrams now, but back then he had only directed one thing. I didn't understand how anybody could have such a passionate hate for somebody who had such a small track record. Plus Abrams didn't even direct Cloverfield.

On top of that I was sick and tired of people talking about how it's going to give people motion sickness because it was shaky cam. Where did all these 13 year old girls come from that can't handle a camera movement? The same place all these peanut allergies came from I guess?

So I went to the movie annoyed. Loved the movie. As soon the lights came up some guy stood up and yelled THAT SUCKED! I yelled something to the effect of OH SHUT UP. We argued. He complained about getting dizzy. I may have said something about how that only happens to maggots. He eventually said he'd wait for me outside. I may have just stayed in the theater for 20-30 minutes before hotfooting it to my car.

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:CONGO? You are comparing Gravity to CONGO?

What is this? What are you doing? I want you to explain yourself right now.

Here is why Congo and Pacific Rim were my best theater experiences:

1. When in a theater watching Congo while a wee lad, for some reason my uncle and I were arguing (I was maybe seven years old?) and he threw a box of popcorn and a full coke at my head.

Police were called because it split my scalp, my mother wasn't accessible, so instead the parents of a friend from school picked me up when I refused to leave with my grandparents / uncle.

Refused to be in the same room with any of that part of the family again as they constantly tried to reconcile us and feel I dodged a bullet early on, all because of Congo.

2. During the opening credits of Pacific Rim (on opening night in an IMAX 3D theater) a fist fight broke out on the opposite side of the auditorium between two guys while a girl tried to intervene: this took maybe ten minutes until the lights came on and one of the guys left of his own volition.

Later during the credits, this group was cheering and congratulating each other when the artist / CG portion was sliding across the screen. Sooo.... I witnessed a fist fight among who were probably contracted artists for the film.

Found this quite amusing.

And note that I did say "best theater experiences" as opposed to best film (an important distinction).

AArdvark wrote:Is that the Congo with the talking monkey?

With the corny "finding a lost civilization" bend to it too... A friend introduced me to pulp magazines when I was young, so whenever I saw something with the "finding a lost city / civilization / artifact / world" I was really jazzed (such as Indiana Jones, Congo, the Disney Atlantis film, who knows how many made for TV movies, Lord of the Rings and its hints at a previous civilization, etc).

I never saw Congo but I did pour a Coke on a girl's head during a movie. I think it was The Horror House on Highway Five.

I don't have too many stories like that. I think I've told all these:

- When I was a kid I went with two friends to see "A Boy Who Could Fly." We were the only people in the theater and the movie was so terrible that we ran around acting like airplanes, pretending to be boys who could fly.

- i went to a midnight showing of Cloverfield. There were four people there; my wife and I, and another couple, about 3 rows behind us. 20 minutes into the film the girl behind us threw up everywhere due to the motion sickness and they left. We stayed and had the theater to ourselves, but the places smelled like puke the entire time.

- I know I've told the one where I went to the movies to see Megaforce with a friend, went to the backroom, came back to the wrong theater and ended up watching most of Blade Runner instead until they found me.

- The most social movie event I ever went to was Blair Witch. I went opening night and the theater was sold out. After the movie ended and the lights came up everybody in the theater was just standing around wondering what the hell just happened. We all moved outside and there were literally 100 strangers standing around discussing the film.

- I had my tonsils removed the day before Return of the Jedi came out. My dad snuck me out of the hospital and took me to the movies. My throat was so sore I couldn't talk and I couldn't eat popcorn (I just drank water the whole time) but I will never forget the entire crowd standing up and cheering when Luke bounced off the "diving board" and caught his lightsaber and started slicing and dicing Jabba's henchmen. A similar moment happened in Attack of the Clones when Yoda showed up for his lightsaber battle. Truth be told it was probably the same people cheering.

I have now seen Gravity.

However, you've all ruined this thread with your terrible theater-going experiences and terrible opinions.

Jonsey is correct that it is the only movie to ever truly demand 3D, or even be made better by it. It is 3D's "killer app". However, it'll probably never happen again, so this is what we get. Enjoy it.

Flack is correct in that it is brilliant at creating believability and tension throughout. Never before has such a technical marvel worked so well on a visceral level. Of course, never before has such a technical marvel existed.

Is it "up there" in terms of all-time greats? As a movie-going experience (that's the part where you experience the movie, not where you jackasses start fights and throw cokes in the theater) it is untouchable. Would it work as well in your living room on a 50" flat screen in 2D?

Time will tell. One could criticize it for having very little if any story, with no really defined characters to invest in, but 2001 is the greatest movie of all time, and its characters made the cardboard standee out in the theater lobby seem deep by comparison.

But again, as an experience, and a show of technical prowess and unrelenting suspense, absolutely incredible.

Four and a half (****1/2) stars.

RetroRomper wrote:Gravity hasn't usurped that title for me, but my "best theater experiences" are tied between Congo & Pacific Rim (more for personal reasons than theatrical, but there you go).

This really is the worst post in the history of this BBS. You KNOW people are talking about movies, and their relative quality, but you derail it immediately under the guise that your personal stupid fucking experiences getting cokes thrown at you by your crazy abusive uncle make CONGO more of a special "theater experience" for you, which was NEVER REMOTELY THE TOPIC.

Do you know how to carry on a conversation? Do you do this in real life? At least Tdarcos, you know he switches topics wildly and inappropriately because he's just completely insane and fat. With you it seems intentional and malicious. "Let's get the topic back on me and my very important and interesting dysfunctional life, not whatever topic you actually wanted to discuss."

This is really bad. I think you need a few demerits, and need some time to reflect on how you deal with people.

The thought of all of us throwing cokes at each other and trying to bait others into fistfights while you approach an hour later ready to talk about Gravity is very, very funny to me.

Didya ever sneak beers into the theater and fake a sneeze while opening the cans so nobody would know what you were doing? Not that I would have ever done this or anything...

Haven't seen Gravity so I cant add anything to the official topic but theater anecdotes are nice.


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lethargic wrote:
Seeing Robocop with my parents and having my dad start passing out during the scene where Alex Murphy got killed.

Brilliant moment in my life- walked in on my mom watching Clerks.... She almost fell out of her chair laughing when they ran out of the funeral home....