Jolt Country

On Caltrops, we are throwing a few bucks in for Paul's next cooking recipe. I've pledged ten and The Happiness Engine has pledged $20 (if he can pick the receipe).

Paul, are you cool with this? I want to reiterate: We genuinely enjoy the cooking videos. I was having kind of a lousy week but after watching the one for Slop I am in a good mood. You are bringing joy into people's lives, but most importantly, you are bringing joy into MY life.

Here's the thread if you'd like to pledge:

http://www.caltrops.com/pointy.php?acti ... pid=152849

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote: You are bringing joy into people's lives, but most importantly, you are bringing joy into MY life.

Oh really. Does that mean I'm no longer a "disgusting, circle-draining orb of fucking lost-cause humanity" and "a piece of rotting garbage", or does it mean I still am these things, but notwithstanding my faults as you see them I can still bring joy into your life?

Well, I am surprised. It's interesting that the cretinous reprobates on Caltrops said it both ways, I heard people saying they liked my food videos and wanted to see more, and others there who gave the impression they thought my food videos were worse than the films of Uwe Boll or Ed Wood.

Tdarcos wrote:

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote: You are bringing joy into people's lives, but most importantly, you are bringing joy into MY life.

Oh really. Does that mean I'm no longer a "disgusting, circle-draining orb of fucking lost-cause humanity" and "a piece of rotting garbage", or does it mean I still am these things, but notwithstanding my faults as you see them I can still bring joy into your life?

Great question. You are no longer those things I said, and I shall fight any man who claims to hold those opinions!

Well, I am surprised. It's interesting that the cretinous reprobates on Caltrops said it both ways, I heard people saying they liked my food videos and wanted to see more, and others there who gave the impression they thought my food videos were worse than the films of Uwe Boll or Ed Wood.

Well, the kids over there don't know how to express joy like you and I might. Sometimes they love something so much, the score "flips over" like Space Invaders for the 2600 and it comes out like hate.

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:

Tdarcos wrote:

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote: You are bringing joy into people's lives, but most importantly, you are bringing joy into MY life.

Oh really. Does that mean I'm no longer a "disgusting, circle-draining orb of fucking lost-cause humanity" and "a piece of rotting garbage", or does it mean I still am these things, but notwithstanding my faults as you see them I can still bring joy into your life?

Great question. You are no longer those things I said, and I shall fight any man who claims to hold those opinions!

Does that mean you're going to beat yourself up like Kevin Spacey does in American Beauty in order to frame his boss for harassment and blackmail him into paying a huge severance? Now that I would really love to see!

In fact, I've heard there's a place on the Internet where people can upload videos of things they've done. You could consider trying that.

Actually, I've seen worse insults, I think. Some woman on Usenet back around 1994 or so wrote me an email where I think she disagreed with what I wrote in a newsgroup posting. At least I suspect it was a disagreement as the first three words of her message were "You fucking bastard..."

Tdarcos wrote:Does that mean you're going to beat yourself up like Kevin Spacey does in American Beauty in order to frame his boss for harassment and blackmail him into paying a huge severance?

like Kevin Spacey does in American Beauty

like Kevin Spacey does in American Beauty

like Kevin Spacey does in American Beauty

like Kevin Spacey does in American Beauty

like Kevin Spacey does in American Beauty

pinback wrote:

like Kevin Spacey does in American Beauty

like Kevin Spacey does in American Beauty

(71,202 repetitions deleted.)

Jesus fucking Christ, and <s>people</s> cretinous reprobates on Caltrops talk about Me having Asperger's Syndrome!

You know, there's a saying that something can be funny once, and maybe twice. But constantly repeating it over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over...

Gets to be tedius. Once was funny, and maybe makes a point. Twice was maybe funny. Four or five times makes you sick, and 71,204 times like you did - or some smaller number - makes you a stupid, unfunny asshole.

If I can offer you a suggestion, quit posting while drunk.

Do you even understand the significance of that? You're becoming - if you haven't already crossed the line by now - a worse bore than I am!

"One piece of pie is delicious. Fourteen pieces of pie are obviously nauseating." - Chuck Barris, TV Guide, 1975

You understand my point, though, yes? That the scene you describe was not Kevin Spacey, and was not American Beauty? That you got both actor and film wrong? Way, way wrong?

pinback wrote:You understand my point, though, yes?

Which required one line to say this, not repeat it 713,387 times until it's had more replays than Its a Wonderful Life or has recurred more times than Bill Murray in Groundhog Day.

pinback wrote:That the scene you describe was not Kevin Spacey, and was not American Beauty? That you got both actor and film wrong? Way, way wrong?

You're correct, and I apologize. Kevin Spacey simply blackmailed his boss with just threats to get a year's severance.

I remember the movie now. It was Ed Norton in Fight Club who beats himself up to blackmail his boss, who calls security, and when the security guards show up, he's been severely beaten but his boss doesn't have so much as a mark on him. I thought that it was perfect: if his boss claims the guy beat himself up, nobody will believe it!

It still didn't require more repetition than Porky Pig trying to say a tongue twister.

[youtube][/youtube]

Tdarcos wrote:Actually, I've seen worse insults, I think.

No, you haven't.

You find that other post you were talking about. If people think that you were insulted to a greater extent on Usenet, I'll cram a one dollar bill down my throat and choke on the tears.

I'm genuinely comforted by the fact that the more Tdarcos / JC changes, the more it remains the same.

Tdarcos wrote:

pinback wrote:

like Kevin Spacey does in American Beauty

like Kevin Spacey does in American Beauty

(71,202 repetitions deleted.)

Jesus fucking Christ, and <s>people</s> cretinous reprobates on Caltrops talk about Me having Asperger's Syndrome!

You know, there's a saying that something can be funny once, and maybe twice. But constantly repeating it over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over...

Gets to be tedius. Once was funny, and maybe makes a point. Twice was maybe funny. Four or five times makes you sick, and 71,204 times like you did - or some smaller number - makes you a stupid, unfunny asshole.

If I can offer you a suggestion, quit posting while drunk.

Do you even understand the significance of that? You're becoming - if you haven't already crossed the line by now - a worse bore than I am!

"One piece of pie is delicious. Fourteen pieces of pie are obviously nauseating." - Chuck Barris, TV Guide, 1975

Next time there's a post over 10 lines, no matter the subject, you're banned for a month.