Jolt Country

The Summer Olympics, where we drag out sports nobody gives a fuck about every 4 years.

The last time I watched a swim meet was Back to School with Rodney Dangerfield, and that was actually diving and pretty goddman entertaining since the villian from Karate Kid played the villian here as well.

So Michael Phelps, I want to see what the buzz is. You got mastercard doing one of there wretched ads suggesting this Phelps character has groupies. ESPN is documenting his quest for 8 medals like its a Red Sox-Yankees world series.

So basically the guy is the fastest swimmer. Great. He is the fastest backwards, forwards and when the have him do the other goofy swim strokes well. And then they throw in relays. Essentially he is doing the same fucking thing over and over, so 8 medals is unreal right? Not exactly.

If someone is essentially doing the same event over and over again and getting a medal everytime that would tell me there are too many redundant medal events. Take basketball, you play 7-8 games, win one medal. They dont then have a left handed only basketball medal round or backwards running basketball round.

If Phelps swam up and down the pool, won one medal and then jumped into a fencing outfit or climbed in the boxing ring and won a medal, I say Athlete, great Athlete and his medal count is given credability. Since he is just swimming and they hand out way more medals for it, YAWN, he swims fast, great.

I dont really have a point other than his 8 medals is vastly overated. He is the best at what he does and you can keep coming up with slight variations of it and he will win. What does that prove that winning one race doesnt?

Somehow, I don't think you are likely to get a nuanced, detailed post about the various kinds of swimming techniques, and I INCLUDE MYSELF, because they ripped out part of my ear when I was 8 and said to never let water get in there. Ever!

I wouldnt read one anyways. Swimming is point a to point b in fastest time possible. Adding all the techniques and giving them their own medal is kinda of dumb. The point is proven in that one guy is winning a bunch of medals in different stuff quite easily.

They should turn it into a decathalon like thing. A 100M race, underwater discus, hitting athletes in the diving comepetition with Javlins in mid dive, shit like that.

I almost agree with Mooseknuckles here.

Although my proposed solution, rather than having a single swimming marathon event, is to shut down the Olympics entirely, forever.

That would please me.

The IDEA of the Olympics is a good one, so if you shut it down, someone will start it up again 6-7 years later.

And then you'll get to see one of my favorite expressions, sitting on the faces of the people who try to bring the Olympics back. It is the, "I, ah, can't believe you're not excited about this????" face. It's like a half-frozen smile. As a programmer, even a bad one like me, you see it all the time in people who want you to make their webpage.

They should shut them down, restart them have all events be a battle for life, death, actual gold and oil.

They did a ANALYSIS video of Michael Phelps which was pretty fucking gay. At least there are three different kinds of runners(marathon, sprint, and guys who can jump hurdles while they run), but there is pretty much only one kind of swimmer, and we have the best one, okay whatever, we're all sick of it. Let's watch some woman's weight lifting.

Worm wrote:and we have the best one

I do not have the best one.