Jolt Country

I just read something which says that the U.S. ending is different from the original British ending.

Can someone who has seen the U.S. version tell me how it ends?

Would you just go see it already??? You've been talking about it for weeks now. Just suck it up and pay the extra $30 for the ticket. Oh, and can you buy the popcorn? And my ticket? 'Cuz I really want to see how it ends here in the states,too. Thanks!

I did not know there were two endings. Huh.

In the American version that I presume I saw over the weekend, being that we were in America, the main character makes it to the exit and gets in one of the SUVs. She begins to drive as quickly as possible, showing that she has come to the end of her character arc as the possibility of an accident no longer frightens her.

Because she's in an SUV she is required by law to do something impossibly retarded on the road, and this is depicted by our director. She turns the engine off halfway on the street.

An 18 wheeler hauling lumber comes up from behind her and gives her the horn. One of the best bits of the movie: to the trucker, she is just another stupid jerk in an SUV who made a bad decision. The trucker cares nothing that she just fought off like thirty cave demons. I'm sure that everyone who has almost caused a blow-up on the road feels that they, too, have just survived an incredibly ordeal that was similar to the events depicted in "The Descent," only it involves soccer practice and can-you-believe-what-Muffy-said-to-Jason on their cell rather than, you know, caving.

The last scene of the movie has a quick cut to our protagonist and the Asian-American girl, looking like a zombie, is there with her. The end.

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:I did not know there were two endings. Huh.

In the American version that I presume I saw over the weekend, being that we were in America, the main character makes it to the exit and gets in one of the SUVs. She begins to drive as quickly as possible, showing that she has come to the end of her character arc as the possibility of an accident no longer frightens her.

Because she's in an SUV she is required by law to do something impossibly retarded on the road, and this is depicted by our director. She turns the engine off halfway on the street.

An 18 wheeler hauling lumber comes up from behind her and gives her the horn. One of the best bits of the movie: to the trucker, she is just another stupid jerk in an SUV who made a bad decision. The trucker cares nothing that she just fought off like thirty cave demons. I'm sure that everyone who has almost caused a blow-up on the road feels that they, too, have just survived an incredibly ordeal that was similar to the events depicted in "The Descent," only it involves soccer practice and can-you-believe-what-Muffy-said-to-Jason on their cell rather than, you know, caving.

This is all the same.

The last scene of the movie has a quick cut to our protagonist and the Asian-American girl, looking like a zombie, is there with her. The end.

This is different. Where were they when you see them? Are they together? And was there a birthday cake involved?

savvyraven wrote:Would you just go see it already??? You've been talking about it for weeks now. Just suck it up and pay the extra $30 for the ticket. Oh, and can you buy the popcorn? And my ticket? 'Cuz I really want to see how it ends here in the states,too. Thanks!

Look, I got shit to do, alright? I told you this when we first got together. I love ya, babe, but if you wanna roll with me, you gotta realize, it's all action, all the time. Time is money, money is power, and if you think I've got time to sit around watching a movie I already saw, then you do not fully understand the Ben Parrish Experience, because I take the world by the short and curlies and don't let go until I'm cold and in the ground, and even then, the worms are in for a world of hurt.

That's how I roll.

pinback wrote:

The last scene of the movie has a quick cut to our protagonist and the Asian-American girl, looking like a zombie, is there with her. The end.

This is different. Where were they when you see them? Are they together? And was there a birthday cake involved?

They were in the SUV. I think the director showed the main girl in the SUV crying, then cut outside the car and then back in where zombie-Juno was.

What happened in the British version? Cake? What kind of ending is that, do the other 5 girls bust out of a birthday cake naked screaming, "Surprise!!!!"?

You're telling me that in the U.S. version, she actually ends up outside the cave? In the SUV? And that's where it leaves her?

I give the U.S. version ZERO STARS.

Well, yes. What, she doesn't get out in the English version? What the Christ? The monkeys have to go outside in order to lure in prey, right? So of course there is an exit and it makes sense that she'd find it.

Are you telling me she doesn't get out in the British version? And what's this about a cake? Where the hell did she find cake? I thought the equipment they noticed was over 100 years old. Let me tell you what 100 years and poor airflow does to birthday cake.

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:Well, yes. What, she doesn't get out in the English version? What the Christ?

In the British version, she's dreaming the outside part, and then wakes up, and is just stuck in the damn cave, with the vision of the birthday cake, and no daughter.

End of movie.

And what's this about a cake?

She keeps having visions of her daughter and her first birthday cake, right? Throughout the movie? That cake.

Unless they took the cake out.

That would... TAKE THE C+++ATH0
NO CARRIER

oh god. "it was all a dream".. i made a story like that in 5th grade.

It wasn't all a dream, putz, just the last three minutes.

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:Well, yes. What, she doesn't get out in the English version? What the Christ? The monkeys have to go outside in order to lure in prey, right? So of course there is an exit and it makes sense that she'd find it.

*sigh* This is what's wrong with American Viewers. This is why Hollywood is going down the crapshoot. Shove that happy ending up the wazoo, Jonsey! Life is full of pain. You don't always get out of the fucking cave!

savvyraven wrote:Life is full of pain. You don't always get out of the fucking cave!

That's depressing. . . you and pinback really are made for each other.

This is actually better than watching the movie.

"Read the TV Guide, you don't need a TV" - Lost Boys.

Maybe the birthday cake is the kind with the marijauana goodness baked right in and she just keeps waking up and dreaming the end over and over again.

What monkeys?


THE
MONKEYS IN A CAVE?
AARDVARK

savvyraven wrote:*sigh* This is what's wrong with American Viewers. This is why Hollywood is going down the crapshoot. Shove that happy ending up the wazoo, Jonsey! Life is full of pain. You don't always get out of the fucking cave!

Wait - I am not saying that I want/need a happy ending. My favorite movie, for instance, ends with an aborted attempt at a semi-gay threesome that backfires.

But, logically, the cave people had to have a way to get food into the cave. We saw one entrance to the cave and it appeared to require ropes and rappelling, which the cave people did not seem capable of. So there needed to be a second exit/entrance. (Plus, I think there was some dialogue about there being markings or whatnot, leading the way to this second exit.)

It stands to reason that if the main character can kill lots of cave people and she knew they couldn't track her unless they could hear her that eventually she would find the other exit and get out. I don't buy her getting trapped in there. I mean, still put in an unhappy ending -- have her read that a giant lemon cake exploded over Edinburgh or something -- but I think it insults the audience if the movie essentially states that she never found the way out.

But don't get me wrong. All that being said, I probably am what's wrong with the average American film viewer, just not in this particular case. I mean, I will be balls deep into "Snakes on a Plane" the day it comes out and also its inevitable sequel!

Snakes on a Plane II; Snakes On A Zeppelin.

And the whole thing fireballs into the sky at the end, thus not having a happy ending.


THE
OH TEH
HUMANITY
AARDVARK

The sequel will star John Cleese, and be:

EELS on a MOTHERFUCKING HOVERCRAFT.

Bruce