Jolt Country

Bill Simmons is a great writer when he's not discussing the NFL. I think he's the best basketball writer there is. I mean, I don't even like basketball, but this is fascinating:

http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/st ... ons/060220

Most Disappointing Moment
Stephen A. Smith showed up at Friday night's ESPN party, forcing me to watch him out of the corner of my eye for two hours so I could overhear him order a drink. Alas, he never did. But I think it would have gone something like this:

-- Bartender: What can I get you?

-- Smith: WHAT KIND OF BEERS DO YOU HAVE IN BOTTLES?

-- Bartender: Bud Light, Miller Light, Bud, Heineken.

-- Smith: I'M GONNA HAVE A BUD LIGHT PLEASE!

If you're ever smoking stogies and winning at cards with your boyzz, the most I will ever do is walk in and ask for your platinum card, and immediately leave. Promise.

Well, Michael Jordan has also cheated on his wife like a billion times. I'm sure she was just making sure that he didn't start humping Charles Oakley.

But still, it's got to suck being a celebrity for other reasons, namely, you could be having good time in Vegas and who is sitting next to you but a columnist for ESPN.com, writing down every single thing you say.

Fame. Ain't it a bitch?

I enjoy Bill Simmons' writing for the same reason. He writes a lot about sports I don't care for, yet something like that is fascinating, even if it is about the NBA and people I've never heard of.

Simmons also writes "running diaries" while watching various things on TV. ESPN charges for their archives now (FUCKERZ), but hands down, one of the funniest things I ever read was Simmons' diary while watching some Championship Spelling Bee of Homeschooled Freaks on ESPN7 a few years ago.