Jolt Country

Danica Patrick is hot.

And she's got a bad attitude and a foul mouth and occasionally wrecks lots of cars by spinning out with cold tires on restarts. And then finishes fourth anyway.

I think I'm in love.

And here's your DUMBEST SPORTSWRITER MOMENT OF THE DAY, from our friend Bob Margolis, over at Yahoo Sports:

If she was Dan Patrick (not the sportscaster), however, would she have been seen as just another good rookie in the field?

Gee, I'm not sure, Bob! Would a male rookie finishing fourth just be seen as another male rookie finishing fourth? Umm. YEAH! I think he would!

But that's not the case, now, is it?

Danica Patrick is a good rookie IRL driver, with admittedly excellent equipment under her cute little caboose, but you cannot escape the fact that she is also a TINY, HOT LITTLE MINKY who acts all PISSED OFF all the time, and could probably BEAT ME UP in a fight, and has a VAGINA. So don't sit there acting all smug and homo, Bob, like you know anything, because you don't.

Plus, you have the gayest hairdo I've ever seen on one of those little Yahoo photo boxes.

OMGWTF A WOMAN IN INDY CAR RACING OMGWTF! Fuckin a' anytime a woman or a black guy do anything new it is just OMG!!!!!!! CELEBRATE DIVERSITY EVERYONE!!

Knuckles the CLown wrote:OMGWTF A WOMAN IN INDY CAR RACING OMGWTF! Fuckin a' anytime a woman or a black guy do anything new it is just OMG!!!!!!! CELEBRATE DIVERSITY EVERYONE!!

But she's (apparently) good looking. That's more important than being a girl or being black. If she was a skank she'd be getting the amount of coverage that she deserved, which is none.

You're a skank and look how much attention you get!

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:But she's (apparently) good looking.

Pinback wrote:But she's (apparently) good looking.

Amazing what can be done with an airbrush/Photoshop these days. And if you look carefully, you can see how they posed her to hide her gut.

So you're saying that Danica Patrick is NOT good looking.

How have you been able to keep your homosexuality secret from your wife all these years? Which Just For Men Gel television model do you fantasize about while you're... "with her"?

nessman wrote:but at the same time she's not jerk-off material either.

Oh sure, now you tell me.

pinback wrote:So you're saying that Danica Patrick is NOT good looking.

No, I'm saying that she's NOT a model, so they had to do a lot of work on her to get her looking halfway decent for the photo shoots. I saw footage of her after the race....she ain't all that great lookin' in real life.

chris wrote:No, I'm saying that she's NOT a model, so they had to do a lot of work on her to get her looking halfway decent for the photo shoots. I saw footage of her after the race....she ain't all that great lookin' in real life.

She had just been in a 120 degree RACE CAR for three hours. How good do you want her to look?

Pretend I logged in as "Creepy JC Forum Poster" or something. Thank you.

I don't know about the rest of you, but my desire to see girls doused in champagne is riding on this Danica chick winning one of these things. But how difficult could it be? All of the guys racing in them are from Europe where there is one street on the continent where you can go faster than 45 mph. It looks pretty easy to pick up to me.

OK, I'm ICJ again.

pinback wrote:She had just been in a 120 degree RACE CAR for three hours. How good do you want her to look?

Hot chick + 3 hours of sweatin' = EVEN HOTTER CHICK

Dog + 3 hours of sweatin' = STILL A DOG

Dogs don't sweat.

So no matter how well she races she is still an 'object'. I thought this was the twenty-something century.

law of the Males #14 : Any woman, however good she is at ANYTHING, will be deemed of less quality than a prettier woman.

Besides, agreeing to pose in the previous underwear shot automaticly classes her in the 'skeezler' category. You won't see J. Gordon or JR. doing stuff like that. Just because she has a body shouldn't mean she should flaunt it. Not if she is a professional. I understand she is a racecar driver. Certanly not a model. I feel she degrades herself.


THE
OK SHOWS OVER
GET BACK IN THE CAR
AARDVARK

AArdvark wrote:law of the Males #14 : Any woman, however good she is at ANYTHING, will be deemed of less quality than a prettier woman.

All men can appreciate the physical beauty of a woman. Far fewer of them can appreciate the intellect.

Somebody like Danica (who has PROVEN that she can race a car as well as a guy) shouldn't have to flash some skin in FHM. But if you want to get the attention of the great unwashed mass of men, flashin' the brain ain't gonna cut it...ya gotta flash the skin. Sad but true.

chris wrote:Somebody like Danica (who has PROVEN that she can race a car as well as a guy) shouldn't have to flash some skin in FHM. But if you want to get the attention of the great unwashed mass of men, flashin' the brain ain't gonna cut it...ya gotta flash the skin. Sad but true.

She looks cuter in the picture I posted just above than the FHM picture further back in the thread... I think. I'll agree - the chick doesn't need to do the FHM spread to prove she's got it.

4th place at Indy... pretty impressive.