Jolt Country

Let's kick things off with Juan Soto signing with the New York Mets.



AHHAHAhahahahahahahHAHAH

Don't get me wrong, I can't stand online Blue Jay fans in the slightest, but man, nothing is better than seeing some pile of shit stacked 5'6" high and 6'5" wide cry that some other team bought up somebody else's all-star.

Imagine if people went to those lengths to be nice to other people.

I had to look up the name and see what all the hype is about.

Well, the Yankees "lost out" on Soto (and paying him $50M when he's 42 years old)... but they did land Max Fried, who has lead the majors in ERA each of the last 5 seasons. For only $30M per season, until he's 38. Not nearly as bad, and I'd argue they need pitching more than bats.

Go Yanks.

Our dogshit front office couldn't get Vladdy signed. What a couple of fucking losers in Shapiro and Atkins. No good prospects coming up, either, and their incompetence with Vladdy masks the fact that they should have had Bichette extended, too.

I knew they were dogshit coming over from Cleveland, where they never won anything, and they have been dogshit here, too. This is how you get a 20 year playoff drought (again).

Thus really ruined my whole day. Goddamn.

I hate Michael Kay. Well, his work. I'm posting this because it is funny.



I will never forgive MLB for putting Kay on as OUR announcer with NO other feed the last time we made the playoffs.

Why does the MLB even need umpires anymore? Looks like the video replay can make the calls just as accurately anymore.


THE
VANNA WHITE
AARDVARK

Yeah. About that. Well. You do still need them there for plays at the plate. And to dust off the plate. And to throw balls to the pitcher when needed. And tons of other things.

I don't know how I feel about the automatic ball and strike thing. Umpires in baseball have a very powerful union and there are plenty of examples of them acting obstinate. Of initiating conflict with players and managers. I can't stand would-be bullies and the umps that make the news are very thin-skinned, so having at least some recourse when a call is clearly retaliatory would seem to be a good thing.

Maybe. I don't have any memory of my baseball team ever "getting a call" in a big game, so I haven't had a game be properly saved by an ump screwing up or hating the other team, I don't think. It would maybe be a thing if they played more big games. :/

Umpires are necessary because it would not be any fun to watch Aaron Boone yell at a computer.

Haha, true.

Jays got spanked. It's one game!

The Yankees got to make their own bats, and have hit 15 HRs in 3 games.

Word is still out on whether the bats are juiced, or if Milwaukee's pitching staff is really that bad.

I was going to be mad, but then I saw that the games are in NY. That park is ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh good for taters. I'll say that. And then Judge isn't using the bats. And honestly, while I'd like to root for the Brewers as sort of my NL team or something, they traded off Burnes and Devin Williams. They keep crying poor, never handing out a big contract (except for Yelich) and they are the bad part of the game in that respect. The one thing I'll give the NFL is that if you develop a guy you can pretty much keep him if you want.

So the Brewers deserve this. They are the only other MLB team that exists that I have a hat from. I want to love them. I love the city of Milwaukee. If Denver got sucked off to Battleworld by the Beyonder, I'd... I'd move to some place in New Mexico. But after that, Milwaukee. But the Brewers deserve this.

I was watching some video of a guy talking about the new bats, and the guy 100% nailed it. Said something to the effect of "The Yankees have me so pissed off about these new bats. I'm pissed my team didnt make them first."

Apparently they are 100% legal. For now.

Nice catch!