The Girl: Christ, Here We Go.

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Thu Jun 26, 2003 10:54 am

So, hey guys? Hey. Pinback here.

Remember all that stuff I said in the email I sent Sunday night, and remember how much respect you all said you had for me 'n' junk?

So, like, just out of curiosity, let's take a hypothetical (sort of a "what if") situation in which I totally go back on all of that, and invite her over to my apartment this weekend for food, fun, and anything else starting with "f" that we can think of?

I mean, I'd be the biggest lamoid on the face of the Earth, right? BANNED, right?

Roody_Yogurt · Post by **Roody_Yogurt** » Thu Jun 26, 2003 11:00 am

Sounds like it might be something to do. I just don't want you crawling back as a broken shell of a man, letting loose another firestorm of advice and adversity. I don't want recuperative Happy Days to be a recurring theme.

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Thu Jun 26, 2003 11:02 am

So, maybe the thing to do is to try it, once, and see if it's a feasible arrangement. Because if it is, hey, it's got some good parts to it:

1. Unlimited sex.
2. Seen with chick (see Jonsey's advice on HOW TO GET CHICKS)
3. Neighbors stop looking at me like the weird, loner freak downstairs.
4. Others!

Perhaps that is the thing to do?

Ice Cream Jonsey · Post by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Thu Jun 26, 2003 11:11 am

Yes, for Christ's sake.

Here's something else: it's tough to be seen in public with a girl if she just comes over to your house. I know for a fact that you have a digital camera.

I think you know where I am headed with this. C'mon now, Pistol Pete!

bruce · Post by **bruce** » Thu Jun 26, 2003 11:12 am

pinback wrote:So, maybe the thing to do is to try it, once, and see if it's a feasible arrangement. Because if it is, hey, it's got some good parts to it:

1. Unlimited sex.
2. Seen with chick (see Jonsey's advice on HOW TO GET CHICKS)
3. Neighbors stop looking at me like the weird, loner freak downstairs.
4. Others!

Perhaps that is the thing to do?

Worth a shot.

Speaking of shots....

Don't forget the digital picture. BLUE needs some competition.

Bruce

Roody_Yogurt · Post by **Roody_Yogurt** » Thu Jun 26, 2003 11:16 am

And don't forget the mustard costume.

THE MUSTARD COSTUME!!

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Thu Jun 26, 2003 11:19 am

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:Yes, for Christ's sake.

But what of the emotional pain that comes with knowing you're nothing but her little plaything, less than a man, more of a prop?

What of that, I ask you?

Ice Cream Jonsey · Post by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Thu Jun 26, 2003 11:19 am

Bwa-hahahahah!

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Thu Jun 26, 2003 11:20 am

I wish I could figure out exactly what he's laughing at.

We've got a "quote" feature here, people! Let's use it, huh!?

Worm · Post by **Worm** » Thu Jun 26, 2003 11:25 am

I think it is funny that some guys are really happy to only be a prop.

Ice Cream Jonsey · Post by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Thu Jun 26, 2003 11:26 am

God dammit.

That "bwahaha" was intended for Roody.

He has made me laugh twice in the last minute, once for that comment, and then once for the mythic hero Taft thing.

OK. Let me catch up here.

But what of the emotional pain that comes with knowing you're nothing but her little plaything, less than a man, more of a prop?

What of that, I ask you?

What emotional pain? Where do you come up with this?

You're going to be having casual sex regularly, apparently, regardless of how badly you seem to want to ruin it and regardless of the fact that you seem to be giving more analysis to each silent smile and shared word than Doogie Houser used to give, in his journal, to his entire fucking day.

And let me add that Doogie was out there saving lives, not ruining them, like some posters in this thread.

Get yourself a bunch of new clothes. Go hit up a "cologne" thread on Something Awful and figure out what the honeys want to smell on their men. (I personally have been using "Curve.") Cook some of the delicious-looking food and drink that you've been photographing and serve it to her. Put in a nice flick and let things take their natural course.

Oh, and should all of this actually work for you -- make sure that when you're fucking her brains out, at least once, she calls you Jonsey.

William Howard Taft Prop · Thu Jun 26, 2003 11:27 am

I LIVE!

I.....HUNGER!

RUN, COWARD!

Ice Cream Jonsey · Post by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Thu Jun 26, 2003 11:30 am

Worm wrote:I think it is funny that some guys are really happy to only be a prop.

Ok, your big brothers on this BBS need to have a little heart-to-heart with you.

I presume that I am the contingent of souls who are being referenced in your post up there. Let me clarify my position a bit:

We are not "happy" to be props, toys, fuckpoles, or any of a number of other things. Certainly, we have the same desires for intimate emotional contact that everyone else has. That being said, cutting off pleasing physical contact with somebody of the opposite -- or preferred, natch -- gender just because they aren't interested in exchanging flowers, saying "I love you," remembering anniversaries, fucking unprotectedly, getting married, having children, growing old, dying, and seeing one another in HELL doesn't make any sense.

I and my droogs (presuming there are some here) have the rest of our lives to get deep within sko Fairy Tale Prince Charming Black Beauty Tales of Kerovnia existence. In the mean time, there is the lovely exchange of the casual hook-up, swinger.

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Thu Jun 26, 2003 11:32 am

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:What emotional pain? Where do you come up with this?

"I neeeed, I neeeed!" - Bill Murray, _What About Bob_

analysis to each silent smile and shared word than Doogie Houser used to give, in his journal, to his entire fucking day.

This is the funniest thing you have ever written. I laughed. Out loud.

'course, then you had to go ruin it with the rest of this post.

Get yourself a bunch of new clothes. Go hit up a "cologne" thread on Something Awful and figure out what the honeys want to smell on their men. (I personally have been using "Curve.") Cook some of the delicious-looking food and drink that you've been photographing and serve it to her. <strike>Add roofies to said drinks.</strike> Put in a nice flick and let things take their natural course.

What is the point of this? I could just bang 'er silly as soon as she walks in the door and she wouldn't complain. Hell, she's probably going to insist on it.

Oh, and should all of this actually work for you -- make sure that when you're fucking her brains out, at least once, she calls you Jonsey.

As per usual!

Ice Cream Jonsey · Post by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Thu Jun 26, 2003 11:36 am

pinback wrote:
Get yourself a bunch of new clothes. Go hit up a "cologne" thread on Something Awful and figure out what the honeys want to smell on their men. (I personally have been using "Curve.") Cook some of the delicious-looking food and drink that you've been photographing and serve it to her. <strike>Add roofies to said drinks.</strike> Put in a nice flick and let things take their natural course.
What is the point of this? I could just bang 'er silly as soon as she walks in the door and she wouldn't complain. Hell, she's probably going to insist on it.

Oh, sorry there Caligula. I was under the impression that secretly you wanted to be her boyfriend.

I was hoping to offer you pointers on how to be "boyfriend material." But if all of a sudden you've accepted your role in this woman's life and you are happy to simply be this guy and ALL the advice that I have previously given you, which I thought you had discarded into some giant, dank, on-line bit-bucket... then that's cool with me.

It would be nice if you actually TOLD us that you've accepted your new role in all of this, however.

If only there were a way to express thoughts, comments, sentences and ideas through this very medium! If only! Damn you, phpBB! Damn you and your Games of Silence!

Ice Cream Jonsey · Post by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Thu Jun 26, 2003 11:39 am

pinback wrote:So, like, just out of curiosity, let's take a hypothetical (sort of a "what if") situation in which I totally go back on all of that, and invite her over to my apartment this weekend for food, fun, and anything else starting with "f" that we can think of?

Whoa!

What is the point of this? You could just bang 'er silly as soon as she walks in the door and she wouldn't complain. Hell, she's probably going to insist on it.

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Thu Jun 26, 2003 11:41 am

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:It would be nice if you actually TOLD us that you've accepted your new role in all of this, however.

I don't know if I've accepted that role. I am going to see if I have the capacity to accept that role. This Saturday.

If only there were a way to express thoughts, comments, sentences and ideas through this very medium! If only! Damn you, phpBB! Damn you and your Games of Silence!

Shortly after HAPPY DAY, we will be having JONSEY IS LOSING HIS FUCKING MIND DAY. Stay tuned!

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Thu Jun 26, 2003 11:43 am

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:What is the point of this? You could just bang 'er silly as soon as she walks in the door and she wouldn't complain. Hell, she's probably going to insist on it.

I enjoy food and fun, you subhuman.

I am also going to force her to watch Magnolia.

"Respect the cock!" - Tom Cruise, _Magnolia_

Ice Cream Jonsey · Post by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Thu Jun 26, 2003 11:47 am

pinback wrote:I enjoy food and fun, you subhuman.

"I prefer the term 'artificial person' myself. Is there a problem?" -- Bishop, _Aliens_

Worm · Post by **Worm** » Thu Jun 26, 2003 11:48 am

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:
Worm wrote:I think it is funny that some guys are really happy to only be a prop.
I presume that I am the contingent of souls who are being referenced in your post up there. Let me clarify my position a bit:

WRONG

The Girl: Christ, Here We Go.

The Girl: Christ, Here We Go.

Re: The Girl: Christ, Here We Go.

Re: The Girl: Christ, Here We Go.

Re: The Girl: Christ, Here We Go.