Tdarcos wrote: Wed Jan 24, 2018 2:16 am
Can you give some examples of what your techniques are?
Primarily, for me, the key is
befriending desire. Desire is generally the addict's worst enemy, as it creates a very uncomfortable, "negative" feeling which demands to be relieved, and thus we go back to the thing that we know will relieve it, although it is the thing we're trying to quit.
When this feeling, this desire, is no longer the enemy, it can simply be acknowledged and allowed. Specifically, by placing the attention fully on the feeling, it's noticed that it is simply an amalgam of various thoughts and sensations, which in the absence of judgment of "bad" or "good", simply
is, and it's noticed that by giving it this focused attention, the energy it once had to push us to our addiction subsides, and is allowed to be just as it is.
This is befriending desire. It's not saying, okay, now we love it. But once befriended, it can reside within us, until it eventually fades or transmutes into something else (which it always does.)
I'd like your take on Alcoholics Anonymous. Personally I have a problem with the idea that they say the alcoholic is suffering from a condition requiring help from a "higher power." To me this sounds like a type of religion or deism and is incompatible with the beliefs - or non-beliefs - of atheists such as you and I.
I went to a few "recovery" meetings, at which the twelve steps were always prominently displayed and discussed, though never to an "official" AA meeting. My main problem with it is not the "higher power" bit -- at least this place was clear to say it doesn't have to be a religious thing, it could be anything you considered larger than yourself; nature, the universe, what have you -- but with the fact that it is focused on dealing with/struggling with your "problem."
The issue there is that by calling it a problem, and implying that it needs to be struggled with, generally has the effect of strengthening the illusion that there IS something called "your addiction" and it IS a problem that you DO need to struggle with, and then it becomes exhausting, as you search for techniques and tools to stave off the dreaded monster.
Contrast this with
befriending the monster. With that, there IS no problem or struggle, as simply putting attention on the thoughts and feelings that seem to lead to the destructive behavior naturally has the effect of turning down the volume, dissipating the urgent energy they seem to create, and leaving you with the realization that there was nothing wrong the whole time, you just didn't notice it.
But hey, whatever works. (I suspect AA doesn't, almost all of the time, but I have no numbers at the ready.)
Tdarcos wrote:
Well, can you give us the Reader's Digest or Cliff's Notes version?
The essential expression of nonduality is this: There is only what is.
That may seem trite and meaningless on the face of it, but its implications are revelatory and shattering. Perhaps the key implication is that it precludes the observer/observed paradigm.
That is, our normal way of thinking is that there is a "me" "in here" somewhere (points to head, or body), and there is a "world" "out there" (points around the room), and the me is observing and living in and moving about the world. Upon the realization that there is only what is, however, this interpretation is revealed to have all of the solidity and verifiability of a wisp of vapor in a hurricane. And not even that.
There is only
what is. If you pay close attention, you'll notice that this is always the case. And though you may still be convinced that your
interpretations of
what is represent the
real truth, eventually you realize you have exactly zero evidence for any of it. It's the cosmic joke, and you fell for it.
After that, you've got no problems.