Jolt Country

Well, BREAKING things, I can do.

My pleasure.

Thank you. I also demand prawns in a ginger/chile sauce.

pinback wrote:Hey, I didn't help her write any poems. I told her it was STUPID and PATHETIC. But I took her to Michael's, because I enjoy getting out of the house.

But you have plastic palm trees and blue lights!

And what are the chances I'll be seen around town with another hot 20 year old any time soon? I'm protectin' my rep, bro.

Yeah, I'm sure that the 55-year old pear-shaped grandmothers who work at Michael's now think you're King Of All Studmuffins.

Take it from a guy whose wife likes to go to Michael's.....BE A MAN AND WAIT IN THE CAR LIKE THE REST OF US. We tailgate.

As for poetry, here's a haiku for you:

Ben is a big queen.
He goes to Michael's with girls
Who he will never shag.

Why don't I just order 'em on a PIZZA, then I can eat two slices of it, and you can take the rest back to your MAN?

chris wrote:Yeah, I'm sure that the 55-year old pear-shaped grandmothers who work at Michael's now think you're King Of All Studmuffins.

Seriously, though? Michael's is staffed nearly 100% by hotties. Seriously. At least, round these parts. And they're forever getting up on those ladders and leaning over to stock things on the high shelves.

Highly recommended.

Ben is a big queen.
He goes to Michael's with girls
Who he will never shag.

The joke here is that I never get laid and let women use me a lot. Do you get it?

pinback wrote: Fuckin' judgemental, holier-than-thou geek loser fuckers. DIE!

Geeks? Maybe. People having actual SEX on a regular basis? OH SWEET JESUS YES!

> who he will never shag

Let's all count the syllables, by the way.

chris, why do you have to come along and ruin threads once they finally get going? I mean, this thread was HOPPING. And then chris, the human emergency brake, shows up and grinds it once again to a halt.

I just hope I have an opportunity to complain about some NEW abhorrent female behavior in the near future.

pinback wrote:> who he will never shag

Let's all count the syllables, by the way.

That's what I get for rewriting the last line late at night. Oh well.

pinback wrote:chris, why do you have to come along and ruin threads once they finally get going? I mean, this thread was HOPPING. And then chris, the human emergency brake, shows up and grinds it once again to a halt.

There are 142 registered users on this board, and a thread is "hopping" if 2 people post to it?

Whoa, we don't call people's boyfriends "n!33rs" on this BBS. Wait, I mean we didn't used to.

Someone help my poor reading comprehension. Does the current girl who Ben doesn't even want that bad have a boyfriend who was in jail? What's this "Michael's" place and why does it exist? It has the stupidest fucking name for any business I've ever heard of.

Ben was basically getting beat up over some girl he USED to hang out with, right? I presume this is the case.

If she took your BBQ chicken pizza to the conjugal visit that's funny, not sad.

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:Someone help my poor reading comprehension. Does the current girl who Ben doesn't even want that bad have a boyfriend who was in jail?

No.

What's this "Michael's" place and why does it exist?

Arts and crafts store. It exists to employ hot chicks and sell me fake palm trees.

Ben was basically getting beat up over some girl he USED to hang out with, right? I presume this is the case.

What?

If she took your BBQ chicken pizza to the conjugal visit that's funny, not sad.

What?

She took your pizza....




That's a bad thing...

She took it from your fridge to give it to another man






that's a sad thing



THE
BLUES
COULD LEARN
A FEW THINGS
FROM YOU
AARDVARK

The man is out of control!

I am now utterly confused by page 14 of this thread. Please to the be of making with the explaining, please.

What's the problem?

All of it.

Sorry.