[ARMY OF LOVE] Pinback's Women 2K5!

chris · Post by **chris** » Wed Jun 01, 2005 10:10 am

pinback wrote:So we look up where it is, and what have you, and I ask again, "So, you think you're going?" Her answer was: "Yeah, if you're going."

Good sign?

Sounds like you have your foot in the door here, mah man. The question is whether you dare peek inside to see what's up....

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Wed Jun 01, 2005 10:16 am

Okay, and the OTHER part is, after that party, there's a little after-party at my place with a few folks, one of whom is a movie producer and wants to hear my music, to possibly use in a soundtrack.

So, the question becomes, do you casually mention this in passing, and see if the Lucinator might be up for that as well?

chris · Post by **chris** » Wed Jun 01, 2005 10:42 am

pinback wrote:So, the question becomes, do you casually mention this in passing, and see if the Lucinator might be up for that as well?

I think the best way to "inform" her of this is as a group...get into a situation where you're talking to the other invitees about the gathering (while she's listening in) and then ask her if she'd be interested in joining *us*. She'll be more inclined to say yes if you do it this way than inviting her in private. It'll afford her the opportunity to learn something personal about you, but having others around there will make her more comfortable about being at your place.

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Wed Jun 01, 2005 10:50 am

This is not a bad idea. I'd just hate for the situation never to come up, and then you're letting a potentially golden opportunity fall by the wayside.

Ice Cream Jonsey · Post by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Wed Jun 01, 2005 11:39 am

pinback wrote:Okay, and the OTHER part is, after that party, there's a little after-party at my place with a few folks, one of whom is a movie producer and wants to hear my music, to possibly use in a soundtrack.

So, the question becomes, do you casually mention this in passing, and see if the Lucinator might be up for that as well?

Hahaha, he's a movie producer in WASHINGTON? It's tough to shut a street down in Farty Fart, PA. This guy is going to be moving sets around in D.C., though. I don't buy it. Unless this "movie" is shot mostly on one of those handycams.

But sure, go ahead and let slip this obvious cacaphony of untrue. She'll swoon for a moment because females are programmed to do such things when it comes to movies, but if she has any brains at all she'll realize that anyone making a "movie" in D.C. is lying. That being said, your plan was to lie as much as possible anyway, so this looks like it'll work.

k. roo · Post by **k. roo** » Wed Jun 01, 2005 12:00 pm

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:... anyone making a "movie" in D.C. is lying.

Not neccessarily, if it's a PBS documentary about the Smithsonian janitorial staff. The rest of your analysis remains valid, however. Also, I'm sure Filippe J. Suckmonger has already thoroughly primed her, so all things considered, everyone should fit right in.

Casual Observer · Post by **Casual Observer** » Wed Jun 01, 2005 4:52 pm

Deliberate Observer wrote:. . . banal bulshit crap. . .

Ah ha, fuckhead, not very Deliberate if you don't think to register your gimmick character on your own - you had to be told to do so. Go fuck yourself.

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Wed Jun 01, 2005 8:55 pm

pinback wrote:Hey, is this a good sign?

There's a send-off party at a bar tonight for a few people who are leaving the company. I asked her "hey, you going?" She all "Oh, is that tonight? Where is it?"

So we look up where it is, and what have you, and I ask again, "So, you think you're going?" Her answer was: "Yeah, if you're going."

Good sign?

LOL!!! My mistake!

Here, above, I was assuming that she would actually show up!

Alas, this was not to be. So! I take it all back! Let's just move on, shall we?

bruce · Post by **bruce** » Thu Jun 02, 2005 2:06 pm

Hey, Pinner!

Maybe I can fix you up with a friend of mine. She was my roommate for a summer when I lived in NoVa, not far from you.

She's intelligent, skinny (I suspect), and possessed of an absolutely terrific mordant/tasteless wit. Knows how to code PHP so maybe she could, you know, help with your BBS. Appears to like bald, depressive, alcoholic nerds.

What are the downsides?

Bald and maybe dying of cancer; indeed, well-past her expiration date (her experimental treatment went pretty well). Also going in for surgery (the hope being that months of chemo made her inoperable tumors operable) on June 8, so not out of the hospital until around the 20th or so at least.

Bruce

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 2:32 pm

TOPIC: Lucy.
TITLE OF ARTICLE: The first not-completely-horrible thing that has happened to the Army of Love in the past two years.

There is truth in the above advertising. This is not earth-shattering. This may not even be anything. But one thing it is, is not-completely-horrible.

Much hemming and hawing among the troops as to how to proceed next, whether to ask her out, where to ask her out TO, when to ask, how to ask, blah blah, this and that, all the regular mealy-mouth crap us losers do because we can't just lay that shit on the line.

Some time this morning, we reach a tenuous consensus that the way to go is to ask the lovely Lucy out to drinks some night next week. Nothing threatening, not "can I take you to a dinner and movie and then into my apartment? Wait, do you like cyan?" Just a little, "Hey, wanna go grab a drink at a local publique haus?" That's all.

Then the discussion turns to, when to ask -- as in, what time of day. The thinking here was primarily defensive. If she says "yes", then great. If she says "no", then fine. But what can absolutely not happen is for her to say, "Yeah, that sounds like fun! Let's see if Jeff and Bill and Mitch and Bob and Joe and Lance and Darth and Festus want to come too!" Because then I'd be stuck. So you want to ask early enough in the day that if that's what she says, you still have plenty of time to fake some unforeseen emergency which will get you out of it. But you don't want to ask so early that it's obvious you've been planning to ask this for the last two weeks.

The Crew settles on the perfect time: 3:15 PM.

So, we're set. Next week, some day at 3:15 PM, I'd ask her casually out for drinks.

She was leaving early today to head up to Philadelphia, and it was getting on in the lunch hour, and I really wanted to get out of the building and kill a couple hours at the Hard Times, so I sent her a friendly AIM: "Hey, I'll be out for a little while, so in case you blow outta here before I get back, have a good weekend."

Her response (this is the not-completely-horrible part) was:

"Okay, have a good weekend! Let's plan on going out for drinks some time next week. Cool?"

Yes, Lucy. That's "cool".

That's very "cool", indeed.

Lex · Post by **Lex** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 2:42 pm

Pinback, you are a WINNER!

Ice Cream Jonsey · Post by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 2:47 pm

pinback wrote:"Hey, I'll be out for a little while, so in case you blow outta here before I get back, have a good weekend."

Her response (this is the not-completely-horrible part) was:

"Okay, have a good weekend! Let's plan on going out for drinks some time next week. Cool?"

Hahah, you got asked out like Lister did in the first Red Dwarf book! Hahah, I don't know which of you likes curries more! Hahaha, his ass looked like two badly parked Volkswagons and your former chest did! Hahah, you both think you're good at guitar!

Hahah, you are both black!

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 3:09 pm

Lex wrote:Pinback, you are a WINNER!

I'd really rather get VX's opinion on this before we start dancing any faggy Scottish jigs.

Ice Cream Jonsey · Post by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 3:11 pm

pinback wrote:
Lex wrote:Pinback, you are a WINNER!
I'd really rather get VX's opinion on this before we start dancing any faggy Scottish jigs.

Haha, like Lister you hate the Scots!

Vitriola · Post by **Vitriola** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 3:34 pm

pinback wrote:I'd really rather get VX's opinion on this before we start dancing any faggy Scottish jigs.

Well, I wouldn't try too hard, personally. Any woman with, oh, I don't know, morals, or any ability to take anybody else in her life seriously and treat them with respect, or, dunno, a spine, or was actually really into you as anything other than more male attention, would dump her 'boyfriend', especially since she has now told you about him. Think about it. What does she think of you if she can drop the B-bomb and still wiggle her ass at you and flirt? It means she thinks you'll take what you can get. I mean, she'd be right, but somehow I don't think that's what you're looking for.

What about the LD boyfriend? Doesn't he deserve to be told she's going to start seeing other people? You pick the same woman over and over again. You think it's promising when they pay attention to you, but they're all doing it in a way that only gets you wrapped around their finger, and they always have an out, that they start using mercilessly whenever you want anything from them. So sure, go out with her if SHE asks, but I wouldn't ask her out at all, ever, period, the end, unless she tells you she has officially dumped her man. And if she giggles one day and asks you what you think of her, which they ALL do, tell her you don't spend time thinking about women with boyfriends, even 'sorta' boyfriends, or 'open relationships', or some shit. It's an out for them. Any woman who really wants a man will dump her whole family to be with him.

That being said, hang out with her if you feel like it, she might realy fall for you, or you could meet some of her friends, etc. etc. Just don't TRY.

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 3:44 pm

See? Now THAT's what I'm talking about.

chris · Post by **chris** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 4:12 pm

pinback wrote:See? Now THAT's what I'm talking about.

I fully expect you to be "engaged to be engaged" to this chick within a month.

AArdvark · Post by **AArdvark** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 5:11 pm

I fully expect you to lose whatever money, credit rating, self-respect, ASAP if you do you hook up with her.

THE
DIRE
PREDICTION
AARDVARK

bruce · Post by **bruce** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 5:28 pm

I want to know what's wrong with my Plan B Cancer Babe.

Bruce

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 5:43 pm

Pinback, you are a WINNER!

So it's a good thing!

You pick the same woman over and over again. You think it's promising when they pay attention to you, but they're all doing it in a way that only gets you wrapped around their finger, and they always have an out, that they start using mercilessly whenever you want anything from them.

Oh, so it's a bad thing.

I fully expect you to be "engaged to be engaged" to this chick within a month.

Wait... so it's a good thing!

I fully expect you to lose whatever money, credit rating, self-respect, ASAP if you do you hook up with her.

So... wait, so it's... it's a bad thing?!

Haha, like Lister you hate the Scots!

FUCK the Scots.