How to handle a noisy woman?

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Post by Jolt Country BBS Admin » Fri Jun 27, 2003 11:11 am

Okay, that will do it for Jolt Country BBS. You can all stop posting now. There's no point. The greatest post of all time has been posted, and so it's rather futile to continue with this.

Goodbye, everyone! It's been a great run.

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Post by pinback » Fri Jun 27, 2003 3:16 pm

I'm posting this so that the last three threads I started in here would all have 21 replies exactly.

BLUE

Post by BLUE » Fri Jun 27, 2003 3:29 pm

WOW

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Post by pinback » Fri Jun 27, 2003 3:35 pm

Alright, HAPPY DAY is over.

Blue, you are one obnoxious, insufferable bitch. Get the fuck out of my base.

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loafergirl
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Post by loafergirl » Sun Jul 06, 2003 7:51 pm

As a noisy one I have this to say:

#1 if you're so sensative about it your a pussy who needs to get a new education in sex, if she's making noise it's a good thing, and if she's making too much noise you can tell her she doesn't have to fake it.

#2 If you really are a total freak and would like her to be quiet you have several options...

flip her around doggy style so she can shover her face in the pillow
have her bite your shoulder
stick your toung down her throat
turn up the music loud enough to cover it up
but I wouldn't suggest sticking your dick in her mouth unless you're 69ing unless you want bad head
1, 2, 5!
3 sir...
3!

James Bond

Post by James Bond » Mon Jul 07, 2003 12:38 am

Thank you, Loafergirl, for that witty and insiteful post. Now whenever I go clubbing, I can say "y'know how to handle a lazy woman?" and they'll all be like "No! No! How do you do it! I've been trying to figure that out for years!" And I can say "Alright, just shove her face into a pillow." When they ask, awestruck, how I managed to stumble across this information... I can always point them to Jolt Country BBS. Thank you, Loafergirl and Jolt Country. Thank you. Although there *is* one eansy teansy little problem... I don't go clubbing, and quite frankly where I'm living there's nowhere to go clubbing *to*. I have a lonely, tortured and above all *boring* existance offline. But I was just nitpicking. That should not detract a bit from the fascinating content that is being spe--written on this BBS! Allahu Akbar!

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Post by pinback » Mon Jul 07, 2003 9:19 am

loafergirl wrote:#1 if you're so sensative about it your a pussy who needs to get a new education in sex, if she's making noise it's a good thing, and if she's making too much noise you can tell her she doesn't have to fake it.
I'd just prefer not to upset or inconvenience my neighbors. Would all of my previous neighbors had been so considerate, yes?

I ain't gonna keep talking about my private life with you people if you're all just going to keep calling me a pussy about every goddamn thing.

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Post by Worm » Mon Jul 07, 2003 11:03 am

Seriously, when you are trying to sleep the muffled sounds of fucking really put a damper in it. You could lose your damn lease if you fuck to loudly.
Good point Bobby!

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Post by Jack Straw » Mon Jul 07, 2003 1:26 pm

Worm wrote:Seriously, when you are trying to sleep the muffled sounds of fucking really put a damper in it.
...unless you're fucking.

You could lose your damn lease if you fuck to loudly.
Did they tell you that in sex ed?

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Post by Worm » Mon Jul 07, 2003 2:17 pm

No, it is public disturbance. I mean can we get out of the "LOL PENIS" context? Now, realize that when you are renting from someone you can't create a ruckus. Furthermore, if the person simply doesn't want to mention it to you (Very few people would, none of us wanted to mention it to our tennants. Even though created a terrible atmosphere well the family had breakfast) yet doesn't enjoy it if you don't at the very least make an attempt to be quiet you are an ignorant, imposing, terrible person. Why is it so hard to understand common courtesy? You just try to not make people's lives more uncomfortable.
Jack Straw wrote:
Worm wrote:Seriously, when you are trying to sleep the muffled sounds of fucking really put a damper in it.
...unless you're fucking.
Does this make sense? I really can't tell. Maybe it's me I haven't been sleeping well. I am going to take some pain killers, have dinner, have a good rest, and wake up and try to tackle that again.
Good point Bobby!

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Post by Jack Straw » Mon Jul 07, 2003 3:42 pm

It's not a public disturbance if you're fucking in your OWN DAMN HOUSE.

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Post by pinback » Mon Jul 07, 2003 4:29 pm

So, if you're playing your stereo at top volume at 2:30 in the morning, that's not a disturbance?

They get police involved for that, dude.

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Post by Jack Straw » Mon Jul 07, 2003 5:47 pm

I have gotten police called because they couldn't tell if she was just getting fucked or getting killed.

That doesn't mean I'll fuck any softer...

So by your logic, sex in a public bathroom or in an elevator is COMPLETELY inappropriate because of the noise pollution and the very real fact that you could be arrested and/or piss off a few people?

I dont get it man. If there's any place you should be able to fuck the way you want, it's in your house.

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Post by bruce » Mon Jul 07, 2003 6:07 pm

Jesus Christ, you bunch of whining pussies.

Just bang on the wall/ceiling/whatever with a broomstick and yell "PUT A SOCK IN IT!"

Works like a fucking charm, folks.

Bruce

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Post by loafergirl » Mon Jul 07, 2003 6:09 pm

Kudos to Straw
1, 2, 5!
3 sir...
3!

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Post by pinback » Mon Jul 07, 2003 6:18 pm

Bunch of inconsiderate douchebags, how about that? DO UNTO OTHERS as you would have them do unto you. That is how I live my life, and that is why I do not like making noise which might disrupt other people's lives. Because I don't like it when it happens to me. Whether it's sex, or music, or yelling, or clomping around in high heels on the hardwood floor, or whatever.

When did it become so un-cool to have a little consideration for other people?

The Bolder

Post by The Bolder » Mon Jul 07, 2003 6:19 pm

Jack Straw wrote: I dont get it man. If there's any place you should be able to fuck the way you want, it's in your house.
Worm wrote:... renting from someone you can't create a ruckus. ... to our tennants.
Worm wrote: You could lose your damn lease if you fuck to loudly.
pinback wrote:That can be embarrassing, particularly in a leased apartment with rather thin walls and ceilings!

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Post by Ice Cream Jonsey » Mon Jul 07, 2003 7:14 pm

pinback wrote:When did it become so un-cool to have a little consideration for other people?
Right when our buddy Pinner started getting laid.

LAY THE PIPE, my friend. LAY THE PIPE.
the dark and gritty...Ice Cream Jonsey!

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