by pinback » Mon May 22, 2006 11:16 pm
Here is a strange thing.
As some of you know, I've met a young lady for whom I've struck quite a fancy. Unlike all of the others with whom that's happened, she at least seems to hold a little promise of a future relationship.
As my mind is wont to do, it took that possibility today and ran with it, exploding it into ridiculously grandiose flights of fancy and depths of burbling horror. Meanwhile, our fun, witty little IM conversations continued.
As the day went on, I realized I didn't quite know where were were in our blooming relationship, or whether anything was even blooming at all. Every slight misstep in our conversation I took as irrefutable proof that I had blown it, and would be alone forever. Something which should be a fun, good, exciting thing had once again become a suffocating terror.
Then I realized I was doing it again. Insane with wanting to control the world and be controlled by the world, my mind blew up to the size of the universe, and imploded again with a crushing, terrible force that cannot be described.
I had gone mad.
I had gone mad, and was still lost in the insanity when I walked into my apartment.
That is when I noticed the words floating around in my head. And as I picked up my bass for my evening noodling session, that is when the music began to float with them.
And over the next two hours, I did something which I had never once done in my 35 previous years on the planet.
I wrote a song. A clever chorus, four increasingly emotional verses that tell a story, a haunting, catchy melody, a powerful, funky denouement, and the most heart-wrenching, romantic climax you've ever heard. It all came out. In two hours.
And it is the best song that has ever been.
This was a very strange thing. But I have discovered something very important, which may make me rich and famous one day:
Madness is my muse.
I think I am sick. But it sounds great.
Here is a strange thing.
As some of you know, I've met a young lady for whom I've struck quite a fancy. Unlike all of the others with whom that's happened, she at least seems to hold a little promise of a future relationship.
As my mind is wont to do, it took that possibility today and ran with it, exploding it into ridiculously grandiose flights of fancy and depths of burbling horror. Meanwhile, our fun, witty little IM conversations continued.
As the day went on, I realized I didn't quite know where were were in our blooming relationship, or whether anything was even blooming at all. Every slight misstep in our conversation I took as irrefutable proof that I had blown it, and would be alone forever. Something which should be a fun, good, exciting thing had once again become a suffocating terror.
Then I realized I was doing it again. Insane with wanting to control the world and be controlled by the world, my mind blew up to the size of the universe, and imploded again with a crushing, terrible force that cannot be described.
I had gone mad.
I had gone mad, and was still lost in the insanity when I walked into my apartment.
That is when I noticed the words floating around in my head. And as I picked up my bass for my evening noodling session, that is when the music began to float with them.
And over the next two hours, I did something which I had never once done in my 35 previous years on the planet.
I wrote a song. A clever chorus, four increasingly emotional verses that tell a story, a haunting, catchy melody, a powerful, funky denouement, and the most heart-wrenching, romantic climax you've ever heard. It all came out. In two hours.
And it is the best song that has ever been.
This was a very strange thing. But I have discovered something very important, which may make me rich and famous one day:
Madness is my muse.
I think I am sick. But it sounds great.