Video Game News From Trotting Krips  

Old News - Now Archived

Pretty easy update this week. I mean, Eidos is now employing a 16 year old girl to be the new Tomb Raider Model. Nuff said, right? I'll get to that in a second. First off, I absolutely have to slam Electronic Arts again.

It's not that I have a personal axe to grind with them, or anything. Aside from the fact that they used to be the best video game developers and now they are a company who is against everything I stand for. I look at myself much the same way that Amphibian did in the Squadron Supreme miniseries. Actually, that's probably why I am not dating more. But anyway -- point is, things weren't always like this for EA.

So what did the SatanCorp-owned subsidary do this week? Well, well, well. They are pulling the plug on Legends of Kesmai, an on-line role playing game that has -- oh by the way -- been around for FIFTEEN YEARS.

The decision to kill the game is evil. Sure. Maybe only about 150 people reportedly still play it. That's absolutely, without question, not the frigging point. The point is that, again, EA has decided to make themselves the bad guy for absolutely no reason. Current Kesmai players are being enticed to go to Ultima On-Line.

I have a feeling that's like finding out that the local McDonalds is closed and attempting to get your daughters a meal from the prison cafeteria in the award-winning HBO show Oz.

Anyway. Yeah, the new Tomb Raider model is a babe. She was born in June of 1983. No big deal, right? Of course, Tomb Raider producer Kenneth Lockley was arrested while looking for a nine-year old girl with which to engage in relations with back in mid-December of 1999. Much in the same way Reviews From Trotting Krips has a ban on L.A. Clipper jokes, this bit is too easy to joke around with as well. It's nice to see that when Lockley was set up, the rest of his cronies were free to indulge in their pre-legal fantasies however they see fit. When the revolution comes (and it will come, sooner rather than later) Eidos won't be up against the wall -- every member of their staff will already be rotting in an arabic jail with their johnsons three wings down.



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