Finsternis

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Fri May 08, 2020 2:03 pm

After a bit of a falling out, and the passage of a few years, Finsternis contacted me again. Upon hearing I'd lost 120 pounds and was under 200 for the first time since I was in my twenties, he immediately began to explain how I was doing it all wrong, and he knew all the secrets that the LAMESTREAM MEDIA wouldn't tell you.

He bought me this book off of Amazon and had it sent to me immediately:

By the way, Finsternis weighs 400 pounds ("down from 430!")

AArdvark · Post by **AArdvark** » Fri May 08, 2020 3:02 pm

Now there's a name I haven't heard in a long time

THE
OBI-WAN
AARDVARK

Casual Observer · Post by **Casual Observer** » Fri May 08, 2020 5:07 pm

In some ways I've calmed down since the groucho years so I'm sure I could be nice to him if he were to join us here. It's not his fault he's a racist.

Tdarcos · Post by **Tdarcos** » Sat May 09, 2020 7:05 am

Casual Observer wrote: ↑Fri May 08, 2020 5:07 pmIt's not his fault he's a racist.

Actually, that's true. I was remeberinmg I had heard
the phrase in a movie, and searching that phrase turned up the 1958 movie South Pacific:

You’ve got to be carefully taught.

You’ve got to be taught before it’s too late,
Before you are six or seven or eight,
To hate all the people your relatives hate,
You’ve got to be carefully taught

A little kid will make friends with anyone, and they don't know anything or care about other kids color, or religion, or where they live, or wealth status, or any other irrelevant characteristic.

It takes a parent, or other relative, to fuck them up with horrible lies, like how whites are superior to blacks, now Mexicans steal, how Chinamen can't be trusted because they have slanty eyes, or that some imaginary man in the sky, that we can't see. or hear, and have no evidence of his existience, is the one that climbs down chimneys and leaes presents on Dec. 24, or that he watches everything you do, and if you don't do what he wants, he will burn you in a fire, roasting you for all eternity, making you suffer intolerable agony... because he loves you!

Casual Observer · Post by **Casual Observer** » Sat May 09, 2020 7:38 am

Tdarcos wrote: ↑Sat May 09, 2020 7:05 amIt takes a parent, or other relative, to fuck them up with horrible lies, like how whites are superior to blacks, now Mexicans steal, how Chinamen can't be trusted because they have slanty eyes,

Hey, HillBilly Mays, I bet you have something to comment about this.

AArdvark · Post by **AArdvark** » Sat May 09, 2020 7:47 am

So.....Finsternis is Santa Claus/God?

THE
WHAAAAT?
AARDVARK

Billy Mays · Post by **Billy Mays** » Sat May 09, 2020 9:20 am

Casual Observer wrote: ↑Sat May 09, 2020 7:38 am
Tdarcos wrote: ↑Sat May 09, 2020 7:05 amIt takes a parent, or other relative, to fuck them up with horrible lies, like how whites are superior to blacks, now Mexicans steal, how Chinamen can't be trusted because they have slanty eyes,
Hey, HillBilly Mays, I bet you have something to comment about this.

Pace yourself. You belligerent drunk.

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Sun May 10, 2020 1:50 pm

I got another book in the mail today. "The Omnivore's Dilemma". I will also not read this.

AArdvark · Post by **AArdvark** » Sun May 10, 2020 1:54 pm

What is his motivation for mailing you diet books, as you are the single least person on the planet to need or want them

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Sun May 10, 2020 1:58 pm

Any personal relationship he has is simply seen as an opportunity to prove his own wisdom/"right-ness". This all came up within 15 minutes of reconnecting. It's the deep, unfathomable sickness of an ego run amok.

The Happiness Engine · Mon May 11, 2020 3:56 pm

Think of all the MONEY you can make re-selling these!

Ice Cream Jonsey · Post by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Mon May 11, 2020 5:06 pm

pinback wrote: ↑Sun May 10, 2020 1:58 pm Any personal relationship he has is simply seen as an opportunity to prove his own wisdom/"right-ness". This all came up within 15 minutes of reconnecting. It's the deep, unfathomable sickness of an ego run amok.

I would pay him to post on caltrops. Look, there is no denying that he is a decent man and a Hall of Fame-level bulletin board poster.

Billy Mays · Post by **Billy Mays** » Mon May 11, 2020 9:35 pm

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote: ↑Mon May 11, 2020 5:06 pm Look, there is no denying that he is...a Hall of Fame-level bulletin board poster.

Can you cite the bulletin board where he got inducted by his peers into a Hall of Fame?

Ice Cream Jonsey · Post by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Tue May 12, 2020 6:39 am

Billy Mays wrote: ↑Mon May 11, 2020 9:35 pm
Ice Cream Jonsey wrote: ↑Mon May 11, 2020 5:06 pm Look, there is no denying that he is...a Hall of Fame-level bulletin board poster.
Can you cite the bulletin board where he got inducted by his peers into a Hall of Fame?

It's sort of a Pete Rose situation.

Tdarcos · Post by **Tdarcos** » Tue May 12, 2020 7:03 am

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote: ↑Tue May 12, 2020 6:39 am
Billy Mays wrote: ↑Mon May 11, 2020 9:35 pm
Ice Cream Jonsey wrote: ↑Mon May 11, 2020 5:06 pm Look, there is no denying that he is...a Hall of Fame-level bulletin board poster.
Can you cite the bulletin board where he got inducted by his peers into a Hall of Fame?
It's sort of a Pete Rose situation.

Finsternis was betting on baseball?

Casual Observer · Post by **Casual Observer** » Tue May 12, 2020 9:06 am

Tdarcos wrote: ↑Tue May 12, 2020 7:03 amFinsternis was betting on baseball?

No, he bet that he wouldn't lose his job for posting racist shit on the web. He was an absolute genius, ahead of his time by at least 10 years before cancel culture even really got going.

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Tue May 12, 2020 9:13 am

wh.. what

Ice Cream Jonsey · Post by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Tue May 12, 2020 10:12 am

Casual Observer wrote: ↑Tue May 12, 2020 9:06 am
Tdarcos wrote: ↑Tue May 12, 2020 7:03 amFinsternis was betting on baseball?
No, he bet that he wouldn't lose his job for posting racist shit on the web. He was an absolute genius, ahead of his time by at least 10 years before cancel culture even really got going.

I think that was Nessman, sir.

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Tue May 12, 2020 11:25 am

Is Nessman a largeman?

Casual Observer · Post by **Casual Observer** » Tue May 12, 2020 1:14 pm

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote: ↑Tue May 12, 2020 10:12 am
Casual Observer wrote: ↑Tue May 12, 2020 9:06 am
Tdarcos wrote: ↑Tue May 12, 2020 7:03 amFinsternis was betting on baseball?
No, he bet that he wouldn't lose his job for posting racist shit on the web. He was an absolute genius, ahead of his time by at least 10 years before cancel culture even really got going.
I think that was Nessman, sir.

oh shit, you're right. Was Finsternis the libertarian?

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