Great Moments in Computer Programming

Animated GIFs & Nonsense

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The Happiness Engine
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Re: Great Moments in Computer Programming

Post by The Happiness Engine » Sun Jun 30, 2019 5:50 pm

Flack wrote:A new requirement is that the tests need to be stored in Excel
Either this means you need to put results in a spreadsheet or THEY SAID PUT A SCRIPTING LANGUAGE INSIDE A SPREADSHEET AND YOU HAVE BEEN SO ABUSED YOU THINK THIS IS NORMAL. SEEK HELP.
Flack wrote:
Tue Jun 25, 2019 6:19 pm
Pretty much... except the people usually pushing the scope creep have little technical knowledge. Usually they're idea people ("wouldn't it be great if...") without having the technical background to know how much work they are causing the other person. That's why, especially if you're contracting out a job, it's important to get the requirements up front and in writing.
I just... I can't abide this any more. I tell people "No." And I explain. And then when they try to handwave I Do Not. I also work in a competitive market without a family so I just can and do leave.

If you can't tell people the truth then things fail.

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Flack
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Re: Great Moments in Computer Programming

Post by Flack » Sun Jun 30, 2019 7:47 pm

The Happiness Engine wrote:
Sun Jun 30, 2019 5:50 pm
Flack wrote:A new requirement is that the tests need to be stored in Excel
Either this means you need to put results in a spreadsheet or THEY SAID PUT A SCRIPTING LANGUAGE INSIDE A SPREADSHEET AND YOU HAVE BEEN SO ABUSED YOU THINK THIS IS NORMAL. SEEK HELP.
Not exactly. It's like this.

Our QC application runs hundreds of tests against our clients to make sure everything was installed correctly, all directions were followed, and all expected GPOs were applied. The current problem is that all the tests are stored inside the compiled executable, so nobody except the guy who maintains the source code really knows what is being tested for or how it's being tested.

The request was to maintain the test data separately from the testing script and store that information in an Excel spreadsheet -- the idea being that a completely non-technical person could open and scroll through the spreadsheet and see every applications and what versions are being tested for. It's great in theory but it's turning the whole thing into a giant pile of spaghetti dependencies.
"Jack Flack always escapes." -Davey Osborne

Casual Observer
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Re: Great Moments in Computer Programming

Post by Casual Observer » Mon Jul 01, 2019 9:44 am

I guess you could use an analytics tool like Splunk to collect and report all that info but with guv'mt contracting that would take like a couple years to buy so that won't help.

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Flack
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Re: Great Moments in Computer Programming

Post by Flack » Mon Jul 01, 2019 12:06 pm

We use Splunk and a few other big picture statistical reporting tools. This script isn't really intended to scan the enterprise and check all machines for non-compliant machines. It's more for like guys making ten bucks an hour to run so we can ensure they followed all the steps when building a new client.
"Jack Flack always escapes." -Davey Osborne

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The Happiness Engine
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Re: Great Moments in Computer Programming

Post by The Happiness Engine » Mon Jul 01, 2019 2:02 pm

Make the compilied executable take a damn text config file that list all versions there. Easy to audit, update, and maintain. Means that Some Fuck is going to have to change his holy cow, so that will never happen.

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Flack
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Re: Great Moments in Computer Programming

Post by Flack » Tue Jul 02, 2019 5:35 am

I figured out what needs to happen. Thanks for everybody's input.
"Jack Flack always escapes." -Davey Osborne

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Ice Cream Jonsey
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Re: Great Moments in Computer Programming

Post by Ice Cream Jonsey » Tue Jul 02, 2019 3:00 pm

Could not possibly you fist fight a man who stands in your way in this job? I tell people, hey, I've got two pieces of advice for you. Right hand and left hand. And if they are capable of stopping those two, I bash my groin into them.

This is how I handle workplace issues and this is the sort of advice I dole out when people have workplace problems.

1. Hit them with one hand
2. Hit them with the other hand
3. Frottage

Did this help, Flack????
the dark and gritty...Ice Cream Jonsey!

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Flack
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Re: Great Moments in Computer Programming

Post by Flack » Tue Jul 02, 2019 6:41 pm

Well I told the guy I was going to hit him but unfortunately I have to fill out three forms first and route them through management, HR, and the union. I didn't mention hitting them with both hands because it's a different form.
"Jack Flack always escapes." -Davey Osborne

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Ice Cream Jonsey
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Re: Great Moments in Computer Programming

Post by Ice Cream Jonsey » Tue Jul 23, 2019 10:28 pm

I have a virus on my computer so I have to reinstall Windows. Yay, I get to use Microsoft's broken-as-fuck products!

Let me begin by not mentioning how god awfully stupid their process to getting into Safe Mode is. You have to restart your computer and get to the login screen. Then hit shift (for hold long?) and choose restart. Then wait for it to reboot. Then navigate three menus to pick safe mode. Then reboot. Then hit "4" to go into Safe Mode.

Just let us go into Safe Mode you stupid fucking cunts.

Next up is the Windows 10 Media Creation Tool. I wanted to create it on the computer that did not have the virus. A Windows 7 computer. But it won't download anything because I had the Windows Firewall (I own a router, don't need it) and Automatic Updates off (they were force-throwing Win 10 onto Win 7 systems, don't want it.)

Seriously - https://answers.microsoft.com/en-us/win ... 0b5b606b45

No notification. They were going to let the media creation tool stay at 0% forever, I guess. Those stupid cunts. I hate their shit so goddamn much.
the dark and gritty...Ice Cream Jonsey!

icj AT HOME

Re: Great Moments in Computer Programming

Post by icj AT HOME » Wed Jul 24, 2019 8:00 pm

Man, that new Twitter home page UI is something awful.

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Jizaboz
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Re: Great Moments in Computer Programming

Post by Jizaboz » Wed Jul 24, 2019 11:02 pm

I have rage-tweeted at Microsoft regarding this for you, icj sir.

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RealNC
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Re: Great Moments in Computer Programming

Post by RealNC » Thu Jul 25, 2019 5:55 am

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:
Tue Jul 23, 2019 10:28 pm
they were force-throwing Win 10 onto Win 7 systems, don't want it.
This has ended, btw. It was a "limited time offer". It's safe to fully enable updates on Windows 7 now.

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The Happiness Engine
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Re: Great Moments in Computer Programming

Post by The Happiness Engine » Thu Jul 25, 2019 5:59 pm

RealNC is slightly incorrect. MS just pushed out "telemetry" (data theft) in their most recent 'security' update so _I_ sure as fuck am never trusting an update from them again.

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Ice Cream Jonsey
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Re: Great Moments in Computer Programming

Post by Ice Cream Jonsey » Fri Jul 26, 2019 12:08 am

I am trying to use the Windows app LastPass on my desktop instead of relying on the internet being up.

I just tried to copy a password to use it on a site. Have any of you tried that?

It KILLS THE LASTPASS PROCESS.

Pressing the "copy password" button KILLS LASTPASS.

I have no idea how software is getting this bad. I mean, American IT culture seems to be a race to the bottom. But really? *Nobody* tried it before they shipped? Nobody thought to block the release? Are you fucking kidding me?
the dark and gritty...Ice Cream Jonsey!

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AArdvark
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Re: Great Moments in Computer Programming

Post by AArdvark » Fri Jul 26, 2019 2:51 am

They don't care as long as they get that paycheck

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Ice Cream Jonsey
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Re: Great Moments in Computer Programming

Post by Ice Cream Jonsey » Fri Jul 26, 2019 4:46 pm

A site I have been a regular user on for about 20 years has this inane login process where they check to see if you have updated your arcade ownership page in the last two years AND updated your profile info at a different site. And if you haven't changed both in two years you can't logon to the forum.

Three sites. Just as dumb as it sounds.

I started a thread in their "Suggestion Box" forum and aside from two reasonable people that correctly saw this process as moronic, it was filled with bootlickers going WELL ACTUALLY.

This same forum has weekly threads wondering why everyone in this hobby is moving to Facebook.
the dark and gritty...Ice Cream Jonsey!

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Ice Cream Jonsey
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Re: Great Moments in Computer Programming

Post by Ice Cream Jonsey » Thu Aug 08, 2019 6:45 am

I had a folder of the source images for Cyberganked. Tried accessing them this morning on the new Windows 10 installation - couldn't.

Go through all the shit people say to do in order for the local administrator account to access them. Didn't work.

Logged off. Logged back on.

Can access the files now.

There's really nothing left to say. Every day I encounter something that Microsoft implemented that the dumbest shit imaginable, that testing would have caught, that is completely unacceptable.
the dark and gritty...Ice Cream Jonsey!

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Jizaboz
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Re: Great Moments in Computer Programming

Post by Jizaboz » Thu Aug 08, 2019 9:58 pm

Yeah.. I’ll still stick to windoze 7 until some game forces me to do otherwise. Would surprise me if Cyberpunk does. Phantasy Star 2 forced me to upgrade from XP 64 to win7 a few years back.

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Ice Cream Jonsey
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Re: Great Moments in Computer Programming

Post by Ice Cream Jonsey » Fri Aug 09, 2019 6:29 am

The thing that bugs me, Jiz, is that if you have a hard drive from a previous instance of Windows and it's sitting there on your drive now ... you have "won." As long as there is any way to make it accessible, it should be easy to make it accessible.

Microsoft has done some things to permissions and fucked them up in a way I have never seen before. I don't know how it goes through this many people and gets this polluted.
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Tdarcos
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Re: Great Moments in Computer Programming

Post by Tdarcos » Sun Aug 11, 2019 9:36 am

The problem with very large programs such as Microsoft Windows is they are so large, no one person knows how all of it works and the number of people needed to develop it (when it is originally created) or to maintain it, becomes an enormous number.

Google reports to the question "how many lines of code in windows 10" as 50 million (but also points out it's a silly measurement to use) but it is the only thing we can use as a relative example of complexity.

How many people are needed for the "care and feeding of a beast like that?" Well, it depends on how many different function points there are, but if I was dividing up the labor for it, each person would be assigned a certain number of specific functions with some overlap in case a particular person quits, moves to something else, or dies. So, my guess is there are probably 4 or 5,000 people who work on Windows, most of whom have very little knowledge of the "gestalt" of the entire program. So unless these people are very well trained you're going to have integration problems as each piece has to fit in with all the others.

This means at least 3 or 4 levels of management as no manager could properly handle that many people reporting to him or her. So say you have about 1,000 function groups, each group handles one function (printing, file support, dialog box design, help wizards, etc.) averaging 5 people per group), and maybe each manager handles 5 groups, or about 25 people. So that requires 200 managers. Who then require maybe 10 group managers and then a project manager, Windows.

This means a group of over 5,200 people to work on this thing. That's the size of a small town. And that simply allows the provisioning and management of the people involved, it does not guarantee you get quality work or that some managers aren't incompetents or bastards. (If you've ever worked for a boss that was a bastard you know it.) People are all different, some are mediocre at their jobs, some are good, and some are stars. Even Microsoft isn't going to get stars for every role, some jobs have to get done and somebody has to do them.

So the quality of different parts of the system will vary, and that can include the "fit and finish" of some components, their operation, and their interaction with other parts. It's the "luck of the draw" as to what you get. "You shouldn't criticize the quality of the dance that a dancing bear does, what should amaze you is that it dances at all."

These considerations apply just as much to Linux or BSD as to Windows with the exception that as Open Source, other people besides the developers have seen the source code and can point out bugs. But on any complicated project it's going to be hit-or-miss on product quality. "Sometimes you win, sometimes you loss, all you can do, is, ya pays your money and ya takes your chances."
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