Here's how I hate Billy Mays

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Tdarcos
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Here's how I hate Billy Mays

Post by Tdarcos » Sun Jan 29, 2017 6:53 pm

I'd rather die than let a pile of mucus like you do anything to help me out. You can use all those nice terms, about telling me it's just courtesy, but it's all a smokescreen to try and make me feel that I've misjudged a load of horse manure like you and think you're a nice guy.

Well, you're not, you are nothing but absolute terror, a horror that is worse than any possible description I could make. You're the worst piece of scum on the face of the earth; a fascist that makes Hitler look like Mother Theresa, that being the only good point you have.

You have so contaminated this universe, that a trillion years of torture in boiling acid, wouldn't cure one second of what you have inflicted upon it by simply existing, wasting space which would be more usefully occupied by maggots.

If there is any truth to life after death, I hope you come back as a roach, and I come back as a shoe, so I can do to you what I wish I had done: grind that infected carcass of yours into the dust, and drown you in your own gore. Or I hope you come back as a slug, as it would be an apt description of what you do: leave a trail of slime every place you touch.

About the only reason I might want to live a long time, is to see a blister of putrefaction like you, get the pricking it deserves. What I would really love to see, is for you to get sodomized with a telephone pole; unfortunately, doing this to you would be an obscenity which would make the most vicious sodomy ruin its reputation for not being cruel enough.

A dozen pedophiles continuously raping three-year-old boys on the statue of the Virgin Mary in a Catholic church during every day of Lent, is more holy and less sacrilegious than your being able to take another breath in the morning. I'd like to say you make me puke, but you're not even worth the effort to stick my finger down my throat; I'd much rather ram my fist in your face, even though it means coming in contact with spoiled meat.

If I never hear from you again, it would mean I had lived long enough to see the world made a better place by incinerating the boil of pus that was your dead body. At least that would be the end of your reign of vomiting filth every time you exhale. It's too bad I won't live long enough to see a vaccination against the disease that each atom of your less-than-worthless body represents.

I hope that you get cancer of the everything, shrivel up and die, so the only thing left that contaminates toxic waste can be buried in a lunch bag.


Not only that, I originally wrote it in 1995 so I was able to know 22 years in advance how much I would hate him.
"Come my restoration… Wash my body clean."
⁠— Martin Page, In the House of Stone and Light

CO

Post by CO » Sun Jan 29, 2017 7:48 pm

I wish Billy were here so we could talk about what a shitshow his candidate is in his first week. I guess more isolated and ridiculed is great again.

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Ice Cream Jonsey
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Post by Ice Cream Jonsey » Sun Jan 29, 2017 8:35 pm

CO wrote:I wish Billy were here so we could talk about what a shitshow his candidate is in his first week. I guess more isolated and ridiculed is great again.
I'll let him back in so he can defend himself.
the dark and gritty...Ice Cream Jonsey!

Amazon.com

Post by Amazon.com » Mon Jan 30, 2017 6:01 am

A simple "I did not enjoy the OxiClean" would have sufficed.

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Post by pinback » Mon Jan 30, 2017 7:47 am

I feel like that rant was originally targeted at...

RAY GORDON!?!?!?
Above all else... We shall go on... And continue!

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Post by Tdarcos » Mon Jan 30, 2017 12:01 pm

pinback wrote:I feel like that rant was originally targeted at...

RAY GORDON!?!?!?
Nope. Didn't discover Gordo until 2004.
"Come my restoration… Wash my body clean."
⁠— Martin Page, In the House of Stone and Light

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Post by pinback » Mon Jan 30, 2017 12:16 pm

Oh. Well, then it was me.
Above all else... We shall go on... And continue!

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Post by Tdarcos » Tue Jan 31, 2017 12:37 pm

pinback wrote:Oh. Well, then it was me.
Nope, actually it was for Dr. Hugo Sign. It's from pages 349-350 of "The Gatekeeper: The Gate Contracts" which I posted a PDF here somewhere. In fact, I think it might have been either before I was on the Bull & Finch Pub or I wasn't around for a while.

I wrote it while I was over in Arlington VA at my sister's place, not when I was at my house in Silver Spring. Because of the local calling areas C&P Telephone had back then, The Bull & Finch Pub BBS was a local call from Silver Spring, but a toll call from Arlington.

At the time, because it was an intra-LATA toll call, it would have been cheaper if that BBS had been here - where this BBS is purportively located, in Colorado - than where it was.
"Come my restoration… Wash my body clean."
⁠— Martin Page, In the House of Stone and Light

Peyote Jones

Post by Peyote Jones » Tue Jan 31, 2017 2:32 pm

Why is Agent Orange up there so upset again?

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Tdarcos
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Post by Tdarcos » Tue Jan 31, 2017 3:58 pm

Peyote Jones wrote:Why is Agent Orange up there so upset again?
Maybe it's like Presidemt Orangutan throwing his shit at everybody? (Bill Marr noted that Trump's hairpiece was one of very few things that look like that color of primate.)

Basically I just wanted to distinguish the quote from my comment at the end.
"Come my restoration… Wash my body clean."
⁠— Martin Page, In the House of Stone and Light

Peyote Jones

Post by Peyote Jones » Tue Jan 31, 2017 4:06 pm

While I may be a drug addict and an almost wonderful junkie, I can't for the life of me see why this guy is banned. Thank you, Tdarcos, for your thoughtful, prompt reply.

CO

Post by CO » Thu Feb 09, 2017 4:43 pm

Hey ICJ, I thought we were getting billy boy back for some trump debates? What gives?

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