GARNER FOODS, INC.

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Thu Jul 03, 2014 9:30 pm

In this thread, I fucking expose GARNER FOODS, INC., the creators of "Texas Pete" hot sauce.

I'm letting go that a sauce called "Texas Pete" is manufactured by Garner Foods in North Carolina. I don't even care about that.

Here's what I care about: (Asperger's level: RISING!)

Texas Pete Hot Sauce is a harmless enough sauce. Tastes fine, mild as fuck, and you can get a bottle for $0.99 tops. Fine.

But then they came out with "Texas Pete Hotter Hot Sauce".

TPHHS is HOT. I've done this before, people. This is a HOT fucking hot sauce. It is also the greatest hot sauce that has ever been, and I will never buy or use anything else.

That's fine. They got my money already.

But the ingredients on the label are the exact same as the normal sauce...

...and there is NO WAY that they didn't make this by just combining their regular sauce with chile extract.

I know extract, my friends. I have (literally, and I use that word literally) weapons-grade extract in my cupboard. (That's really not a lie, btw. The shit in my cupboard is what they make "pepper spray" out of.) I know my extract.

So don't tell me you're not using extract.

In this thread, I will CONFRONT Garner Foods, the creator of Texas Pete Hotter Hot Sauce and force them to admit that it's just the regular sauce plus extract.

Which I would have done anyway. I'm still throwing away everything else, because it will never get any better than this.

BRING IT ON, GARNER FOODS.

STATUS
==============
I have emailed them, and posted on their Facebook page. In both places, I expressed my affinity for the sauce in glowing terms, and then "just out of curiosity" asked them about the extract thing.

SO FAR: NO REPLY.

(But it's late, up there in North Carolina, which is not Texas by any stretch of the imagination.)

Tdarcos · Post by **Tdarcos** » Fri Jul 04, 2014 4:25 pm

The History Channel did a show about hot spices. It's where I learned about Bhut Jolokia, which has a Scoville Unit rating of about 1,000,000, which can be compared to jalapenos at about 5,000 Scoville Units.

The show discussed the making of the McIlhenmy Company's signature product, Tabasco sauce, which they make from their own special peppers at their plant on Avery Island, Louisiana.

The original mash is packed in wooden barrels, sealed with a layer of salt and left to cure for three years. Then they decant it, let it rest for a month then cut it with vinegar. (The decanted mash is about 60,000 Scoville Units, much too strong. By cutting it with vinegar they bring it down to 5-6000).

So. to answer your question, all Texas Pete has to do is use less vinegar to cut their sauce, and the exact same recipe will come up much hotter.

I was talking to one of the bakery staff at a Ralphs Grocery in Southern California about 25 years ago because I was mentioning how I lilke the bulk chocolate chip cookies they make, but I felt they were too crispy, I would have liked them a bit softer, like oatmeal raisin, although not that soft.

He was telling me it's the flour. Use more flour in the recipe and you get a softer cookie. Use more shortening and you get a crispier cookie. And most people prefer crispier chocolate chip cookies, which is why they make them that way.

So it's all in the recipe as far as the hot sauce is concerned, and all it can take is to change the amount of vinegar, maybe by just a little bit, and it can dramatically change the heat level. Also, when they add vinegar can change the heat level by how fast the chilies release the capcacin, which is the part that gives the feeling of heat.

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Fri Jul 04, 2014 4:53 pm

Tdarcos wrote: So. to answer your question, all Texas Pete has to do is use less vinegar to cut their sauce, and the exact same recipe will come up much hotter.

Wow, that's not like you to write a page and a half without knowing what the fuck you're talking about! Everything okay at home?

PAUL: I KNOW WHAT EXTRACT TASTES LIKE. I CAN TELL IF A SAUCE HAS EXTRACT IN IT.

TEXAS PETE'S HOTTER HOT SAUCE HAS EXTRACT IN IT.

They didn't just "lower the amount of vinegar". Christ.

Just shut the fuck up if you don't know anything about what you're talking about.

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Fri Jul 04, 2014 5:42 pm

By the way, my original statement that the ingredient lists were identical was wrong. The "Hotter" one lists "natural flavor" as one of the last things on the list.

This guy is a goddamn lunatic, but he does point out that "natural flavor" is occasionally used instead of "extract", to sneak it past unaware customers.

He also mentions that it definitely tastes like extract.

So, I take it all back. Fuck "Texas Pete's Hotter Hot Sauce" right in the rectum.

(The normal variety is still pretty goddamn good.)

Tdarcos · Post by **Tdarcos** » Fri Jul 04, 2014 5:43 pm

pinback wrote:Just shut the fuck up if you don't know anything about what you're talking about.

That has never stopped you from making comments.

But the fact remains that you said that the ingredient list is exactly the same for both sauces. If the other sauce that is hotter has a different ingredient, this has to be listed. This is a requirement under federal law, and releasing a food product with an inaccurate label is a serious offense.

So if the ingredients are exactly the same, then it has to be the manner of processing. Otherwise, since I am apparently so stupid, how do they get a different level of heat in two different sauces with nothing different in the ingredients.

You're the one who said both products have the identical ingredients, therefore the way they are processed must be different.

By the way, since you seem to be so certain that I am wrong and you know how this stuff is made, please state exactly where and when you saw how hot sauce is made and how you know as a certainty I'm wrong.

Teach me. Show me your brilliance so I can learn something, since you know so much more about it than I do.

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Fri Jul 04, 2014 5:45 pm

Tdarcos wrote:By the way, since you seem to be so certain that I am wrong and you know how this stuff is made, please state exactly where and when you saw how hot sauce is made and how you know as a certainty I'm wrong.

Because extract tastes like extract.

co · Post by co » Fri Jul 04, 2014 8:47 pm

pinback wrote:I'm letting go that a sauce called "Texas Pete" is manufactured by Garner Foods in North Carolina. I don't even care about that.

The lady who created Texas Pete was my grandparents' neighbor in Winston Salem until they both died. Now my family owns an unoccupied house that is neighbors with the lady who started texas pete.

co · Post by co » Fri Jul 04, 2014 10:35 pm

Texas Pete is really from Winston Salem, NC.

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Sat Jul 05, 2014 4:23 am

co wrote:Texas Pete is really from Winston Salem, NC.

Wow, interesting! Although I was sort of getting at that when I wrote, in the SECOND SENTENCE OF THE OP:

I'm letting go that a sauce called "Texas Pete" is manufactured by Garner Foods in North Carolina. I don't even care about that.

Or perhaps what I was hinting at in the VERY LAST SENTENCE OF THE OP:

(But it's late, up there in North Carolina, which is not Texas by any stretch of the imagination.)

Christ. Did IQs just drop sharply while I was away?

Tdarcos · Post by **Tdarcos** » Sat Jul 05, 2014 8:37 am

pinback wrote:
Tdarcos wrote:By the way, since you seem to be so certain that I am wrong and you know how this stuff is made, please state exactly where and when you saw how hot sauce is made and how you know as a certainty I'm wrong.
Because extract tastes like extract.

Yeah, but you didn't say that in your original article; you said that both items had the exact same ingredient list. It was only later - after I wrote my comments based on your original posting - that you noted the hotter one carried extract.

I think you owe me an apology for insulting me. Had you said the right thing in the first place, instead of misstating the obvious, then insulting me for relying on your original misstatement, the whole issue would not have come up.

I mean, think about it. You said that both had the exact same ingredients item for item. So I tried to present an answer that could explain why two different products with item-for-item identical contents could be different. Then you proceed to bad mouth me for replying to what you said, after you discovered you misstated what you meant. Then you blame me for responding to your misstatements.

I presume this is part of your master plan to drive everyone off this BBS, true?

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Sat Jul 05, 2014 9:19 am

Tdarcos wrote:
Because extract tastes like extract.
Yeah, but you didn't say that in your original article; you said that both items had the exact same ingredient list. It was only later - after I wrote my comments based on your original posting - that you noted the hotter one carried extract.

Oh, I guess you're right.

EXCEPT FOR THIS SENTENCE IN THE ORIGINAL POST, WHICH IS ALSO THE ONLY ONE I EMPHASIZED WITH ITALICS, YOU FUCKING LUNATIC:

...and there is NO WAY that they didn't make this by just combining their regular sauce with chile extract.

Get your other eye checked.

AArdvark · Post by **AArdvark** » Sat Jul 05, 2014 10:42 am

I just Googled it and North Carolina is NOT in Texas.

THE
SHARPER
AARDVARK

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Mon Jul 07, 2014 8:57 am

The fucking BALLS on these jackasses!

I questioned them about it on their Facebook page, asking if they put extract in, and the response was:

"Here's a list of the ingredients, Ben: Peppers, Vinegar, Salt, Xanthan Gum, Natural Flavor, and Benzoate of Soda (to preserve freshness and flavor). Hope this helps!"

Oh, it helped. It helped prove to me what a bunch of consummate dickheads they are.

Flack · Post by **Flack** » Mon Jul 07, 2014 10:12 am

I am beginning to suspect "natural flavor" is "the last guy who asked what was in the hot sauce."

Watch out for Pete, man. He's got a quick temper and a six shooter to match.

Jizaboz · Post by **Jizaboz** » Tue Jul 08, 2014 6:59 am

I'm going to have to try this! I eat Texas Pete constantly with a lot of different foods since I live so close to where it's made. Another alternate flavor they have is one with extra garlic added. It's pretty good.

Don't bother with the buffulo wing sauce though. It's just Texas Pete mixed with margarine. Easy enough to do yourself.

GARNER FOODS, INC.

GARNER FOODS, INC.

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