[RECIPE] Benicotti

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[RECIPE] Benicotti

Post by pinback »

The following recipe is for Benicotti, which is also called Ben's Famous Manicotti. I made manicotti for the first time tonight, and it was so terrifically wonderful that it instantly became famous, and had my name attached to it.

I will say that the basic manicotti recipe I used was stolen from a very highly respected website specializing in only the finest of epicurean delights. I felt a bit sheepish, then, going for the cheapest brand of dried manicotti in the store, that being "American Beauty" brand. Just so I could feel superior, I lowered myself to actually reading the -- I know, it's embarrassing -- recipe they listed on the pasta box itself as to how to make manicotti...

...and it was the exact same recipe. So though this recipe is famous, and does have my name attached to it, apparently there is really only one way to make manicotti in the world, and thus it is the very best recipe you will find. I give it to you now, and I am not waxing psychotic when I tell you that it was the finest manicotti I've ever had, and one of the best meals I can remember, which sounds more impressive if you conveniently forget to take into account that I mainly eat ramen noodles anymore and my memory is ravaged by alcohol abuse.

BENICOTTI

1 pot Ben's Famous All-Purpose Italian Red Sauce (see below)
1 package dry manicotti pasta
1 15oz thing of ricotta
8 oz of mozzarella, grated
3/4 cup grated parmesan cheese
2 tablespoons chopped Italian parsley
2 eggs
1 gallon-sized ziploc plastic bag

1. Cook the manicotti, but only until the noodles are about 3/4 of the way done. You still want 'em a little firm so you can work with 'em. They'll cook the rest of the way in the oven.

2. Set 3/4 cooked manicottis out on some foil to cool.

3. Meanwhiles, mix ricotta, mozz, 1/2 cup of the parm, parsley, eggs, and some salt 'n' pepper in a big bowl.

4. Fill plastic bag with cheese mixture.

5. This is the best part. Close the ziploc bag, and then cut a little piece of the corner off the bag.

6. Take your cooled manicottis and fill 'em up by squeezin' the cheese mixture into 'em from the plastic bag! This is the most fun thing ever! Me, it was easier to fill one half up, then turn it around and fill up the other half. I didn't want it to end!

7. Get yourself a baking dish. I used like a 6x10" one which was perfect, but whatever you got.

8. Lay down a layer of Ben's Famous All-Purpose Red Sauce on the bottom.

9. Put them filled up manicottis on the bottom, lining 'em up like that scene in Full Metal Jacket where they had all them dead gooks down there and was throwin' lime on 'em.

10. Cover the manicottis with more of BFA-PRS.

11. Sprinkle with remaining parm.

12. Cover with foil, and bake for 40 minutes at 350.

13. Remove foil and bake for 10-15 more minutes uncovered.

14. Enjoy the best goddamned meal you'll be able to remember. (For best results, eat mostly ramen noodles and drink until you can't remember your best friend at the last job you had.)



BONUS RECIPE: Ben's Famous All-Purpose Whatever I Said

1 28-oz can of Tomato Puree.
6 cloves garlic, minced
Some dried basil
Some dried oregano
1 tbsp sugar
1 tbsp balsamic vinegar
Some olive oil
Salt/pepper

1. Sautee garlic in 1/4 cup olive oil for 2 minutes.
2. Add tomato puree, a bunch of dried basil, some dried oregano, and the balsamic vinegar, and stir.
3. Simmer over low heat for an hour, adding salt, pepper, and sugar in various amounts until it tastes good.

This is a remarkably versatile sauce. That's all I'll say. I once remarked how versatile it was, that's how remarkably versatile it is.
I don't have to say anything. I'm a doctor, too.

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Ice Cream Jonsey
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Re: [RECIPE] Benicotti

Post by Ice Cream Jonsey »

pinback wrote:if you conveniently forget to take into account that I mainly eat ramen noodles anymore and my memory is ravaged by alcohol abuse.
This will never happen. You must stop teasing your imagination with this possibility.
the dark and gritty...Ice Cream Jonsey!

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Re: [RECIPE] Benicotti

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pinback wrote:9. Put them filled up manicottis on the bottom, lining 'em up like that scene in Full Metal Jacket where they had all them dead gooks down there and was throwin' lime on 'em.
We're having this tonight. This is the greatest cooking instruction I have ever given.
I don't have to say anything. I'm a doctor, too.

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Re: [RECIPE] Benicotti

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Fourteen years later, still the best possible food item it is possible to shove into your fat face:

Image
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AArdvark
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Re: [RECIPE] Benicotti

Post by AArdvark »

Q: is the sugar in the red sauce to cut the acidity?

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Re: [RECIPE] Benicotti

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Sure, why not. Also I just think it makes it taste good.
I don't have to say anything. I'm a doctor, too.

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