Lawn Etiquette, is that a thing?

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AArdvark
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Lawn Etiquette, is that a thing?

Post by AArdvark »

Dear Ann Landers,
I never noticed this before when I was living in the city but now that I'm in the 'burbs I feel that there is a different set of rules. Every week I mow my lawn, so does my neighbor on the right and my neighbor on the left. But if I'm mowing my lawn they will not mow theirs until I have finished mine. A couple times I have started to mow my lawn when my right side neighbor has already started his. He will stop mowing and do other stuff, like picking up sticks or maybe tending to the mulch in the flowerbeds. As soon as I finish he will fire up his mower and go back to cutting his lawn. This makes me feel like I have committed some suburban faux pas. I noticed it with the left hand neighbor as well. I mean, I bought the John Deere so I would fit in, (disco lights aside) but since then they have both switched to Kubota zero-turns. Is it wrong for me to start mowing if my next door neighbors have already started? Is this something like letting a bowler on the next lane go before you start your roll? Am I offending them in some unwritten yard-work manner and making myself look like a suburban newbie?

Thanks,

THE
GUILT RIDING MOWER
AARDVARK

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Ice Cream Jonsey
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Re: Lawn Etiquette, is that a thing?

Post by Ice Cream Jonsey »

That is - wow. I have never heard of that.

My father likes mowing more than any other man alive. I will ask him about this. But I think I have memories of all the dads in the neighborhood that I grew up in running their tractors around at the same time.
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Re: Lawn Etiquette, is that a thing?

Post by pinback »

Maybe they just can't stand the sight of ya?
In the yard, not too far from the car.

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AArdvark
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Re: Lawn Etiquette, is that a thing?

Post by AArdvark »

Now, I'm being serious here, is it a thing? I want to know if anyone has seen/ heard of stuff like this. I don't want to be a pariah of my street. Cracking wise isn't helping, and I know you want to help

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Tdarcos
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Re: Lawn Etiquette, is that a thing?

Post by Tdarcos »

Dear Guilt Rider:

Yes, you should be concerned. Mowing one's lawn is a sacred duty, not to be taken lightly, and like the Bible teaches us about prayer in Mathew 6:6, should only be done in secret. Your neighborhood welcoming committee should have given you the Universal Rules of Lawn Mowing Etiquette, which say, "Always treat mowing your lawn according to the Standard Rules For Masturbating in Public: do it only when no one is around or no one can see you; hide the use of the equipment so as not to bother neighbors; and be sure to clean up after yourself when you're finished playing around."

Hope this helps,
Sincerely,
Lnn Aanders
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- Duran Duran, Ordinary World

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AArdvark
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Re: Lawn Etiquette, is that a thing?

Post by AArdvark »

When's the last time you mowed grass?

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Tdarcos
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Re: Lawn Etiquette, is that a thing?

Post by Tdarcos »

AArdvark wrote: Sat Oct 10, 2020 1:59 pm When's the last time you mowed grass?
Probably not in 30 years. We had an electric lawnmower and a string trimmer, for places you can't reach, like within about a meter of the fire hydrant at the corner of our front lawn. Whenever the lawn got too long (by my mother's estimate) I'd cut it, probably every 2-3 weeks. When I no longer had a lawn I stopped cutting it.
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bryanb
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Re: Lawn Etiquette, is that a thing?

Post by bryanb »

I think it's reflective of a change in the culture. When I was growing up, I remember it not being uncommon to see multiple neighbors mowing at the same time. Now I think people are more likely to want some privacy as they mow. Honestly, I feel that way myself. I generally wait for quiet, bystander-free times to mow (part of the reason I don't mow that much). You don't want a nosy neighbor judging your technique or your rig. Also, the Rand Paul attack was a watershed (if not woodshed) moment that illustrated just how dangerous lawn work can be. You never know when a neighbor is going to get so pissed off about your mowing or brush management that he attacks you from behind and breaks your ribs. Who wants the aggravation, really?

The good news is I don't think it's personal. Does your left neighbor ever mow at the same time as the right neighbor or any of their other neighbors? I doubt that they're angry with you personally. Maybe they feel a little annoyed that they have to stop mowing whenever you start, but you can fix that by just waiting for them to finish before you start. Maybe the neighborhood could start posting weekly mowing schedules so no toes get stepped on.

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The Happiness Engine
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Re: Lawn Etiquette, is that a thing?

Post by The Happiness Engine »

This is completely insane as someone who mowed lawns with wild abandon as a teenager. I can't even CONCEIVE of how this isn't a complete fabrication.

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AArdvark
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Re: Lawn Etiquette, is that a thing?

Post by AArdvark »

I really believe this is a thing. Maybe it's just my neighbors, but it feels weird.

Commander, why is everything perverted in your world? Public masturbation? Seriously? I'm just trying to cut my lawn.

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Billy Mays
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Re: Lawn Etiquette, is that a thing?

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Re: Lawn Etiquette, is that a thing?

Post by pinback »

AArdvark wrote: Sat Oct 10, 2020 1:59 pm When's the last time you mowed grass?
If you know what I mean.
In the yard, not too far from the car.

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Flack
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Re: Lawn Etiquette, is that a thing?

Post by Flack »

You might be on to something, 'Vark. My three neighbors (left, right, and across the street) love yardwork so much that each of them spend two days a week working on their lawns, but none of them do it when the others are out. That means six out of seven days every week, someone is either mowing, edging, or weed eating. Actually it's seven, because on the seventh day my lawn guy shows up and his crew takes care of the entire yard in about an hour.
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Re: Lawn Etiquette, is that a thing?

Post by pinback »

AArdvark wrote: Sat Oct 10, 2020 4:40 pm I really believe this is a thing.
The answer I gave is the most likely. And my answer is completely insane (I think.)

"One mower at a time" is not a thing.
In the yard, not too far from the car.

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Re: Lawn Etiquette, is that a thing?

Post by Casual Observer »

Flack wrote: Sat Oct 10, 2020 7:59 pm You might be on to something, 'Vark. My three neighbors (left, right, and across the street) love yardwork so much that each of them spend two days a week working on their lawns, but none of them do it when the others are out. That means six out of seven days every week, someone is either mowing, edging, or weed eating. Actually it's seven, because on the seventh day my lawn guy shows up and his crew takes care of the entire yard in about an hour.
This is starting to sound like a question from a cognitive test or SAT.

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Tdarcos
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Re: Lawn Etiquette, is that a thing?

Post by Tdarcos »

AArdvark wrote: Sat Oct 10, 2020 4:40 pm I really believe this is a thing. Maybe it's just my neighbors, but it feels weird.

Commander, why is everything perverted in your world? Public masturbation? Seriously? I'm just trying to cut my lawn.
Expletives R. Deleted! Doesn't anyone understand hyperbole and satire anymore? I figured that comment would be so ridiculously over the top nobody could possibly believe it was anything but silly exaggeration.
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AArdvark
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Re: Lawn Etiquette, is that a thing?

Post by AArdvark »

Anyone else it would be

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Ice Cream Jonsey
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Re: Lawn Etiquette, is that a thing?

Post by Ice Cream Jonsey »

I generally believe that the type of people who get up at 5 to work on their lawn are losers (I've seen threads about this on various forums and they are sooo snotty and such pieces of shit, but what it comes down to is that they are giant pussies that cry like babies if they have to "work in the sun" so if that means the mower starts at a quarter after five, too bad - selfish pieces of shit) but the fact that apparently they are all shy pissers about it and won't do it if someone else is, thus extending the days and hours they ruin ... that's amazing. That's a level of psychopathic selfishness I didn't know they had it in them.
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AArdvark
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Re: Lawn Etiquette, is that a thing?

Post by AArdvark »

Everyone around me is retired so they have nothing to do but tend to their yards and watch Guiding Light, or whatever. The guy across the street apparently cuts his lawn with scissors, it's so immaculate. I swear he's got some kind of leaf sensor so when a tree sheds onto his front green he's out there raking within minutes.

Well, I'm glad to know there's no unwritten protocol about yardwork. I will continue to mow at my convenience regardless of the neighbors, and I will feel no guilt.

ps does anyone else mow with booze in the drink holder?

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Re: Lawn Etiquette, is that a thing?

Post by pinback »

No, you chug a beer when you start, and then chug another one every time you swing past the house.
In the yard, not too far from the car.

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