Subtle Creepy

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pinback
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Subtle Creepy

Post by pinback »

Someone (let's call him, "Fred") posts a picture of their pre-teen daughter on Facebook

One of their Facebook friends (let's call him, "Brian") says "Hoo boy, Fred, you're in trouble! Ha ha ha!" Everyone has a good laugh.

Are we just ignoring the fact that Brian just announced publicly that he thinks Fred's 12-year-old daughter is hot?
I don't have to say anything. I'm a doctor, too.

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Tdarcos
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Post by Tdarcos »

Let's see if I can think of alternative possibilities:
* Sees daughter whose face looks like a pepperoni pizza, realizes the poor girl is going to have massive insecurities from her acne and Fred will have all that drama.
* Sees daughter whose body looks like a barrel, realizes the poor girl is going to have massive insecurities from her obesity and Fred will have all that drama.
* Notices she has a terrible overbite or crooked teeth, realizes Fred is going to have thousands of dollars in dental bills.
* Notices she's carrying a musical instrument that is expensive to be able to practice with and smiling, meaning she likes playing it and it's going to be a big expense.
* Same thing with the musical instrument but it's one that can cause tooth problems.
* Is wearing a tee shirt of a horse and figures she's going to want (again, expensive) riding lessons.
* Is wearing clothing indicating she is supportive of GLBT causes or is herself lesbian but knows Fred is a rabid homophobe.
* Two or more of the above.

And here's one really silly one just for laughs:
* Sees daughter performing an obscene sexual practice on Fred and realizes it won't be long before he goes to prison where he soon will be doing that for guys named "Bubba."
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Post by pinback »

Do you realize that that is the least-funny post anyone has ever posted in the history of the internet? No, you do not. And you will reply to this with a long explanation of how it can't be the least funny post and then quote 20 examples and make a mess of the entire thing.

Just do this: If you catch yourself writing something, and any part of your motivation for doing so is to be funny, or make the reader laugh, just stop, and cancel the message. You have never said anything funny in your life, and have no capacity to understand humor.

As in:
I don't have to say anything. I'm a doctor, too.

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Post by Tdarcos »

pinback wrote:Do you realize that that is the least-funny post anyone has ever posted in the history of the internet?
No, I think there have been worse.

Now, as for your original statement, my response, except for the last one, weren't intended to be funny. They were intended to provide non-pervy, realistic and reasonable reasons why a man, seeing a picture of another man's daughter, might consider the first man might have troubles.
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Post by pinback »

Tdarcos wrote:Now, as for your original statement, my response, except for the last one, weren't intended to be funny. They were intended to provide non-pervy, realistic and reasonable reasons why a man, seeing a picture of another man's daughter, might consider the first man might have troubles.
No, those were not realistic, reasonable reasons why anyone would say that. You have no capacity to understand not only humor, but the bulk of normal human interaction.
I don't have to say anything. I'm a doctor, too.

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Ice Cream Jonsey
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Post by Ice Cream Jonsey »

It was a bad post, Paul.
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Post by Jizaboz »

It was a bad topic, Pinback.

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Post by Flack »

Tdarcos wrote:my response, except for the last one, weren't intended to be funny.
You nailed it. Except for the last one.
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Post by AArdvark »

I stopped reading after this:

the musical instrument but it's one that can cause tooth problems.
What, those orange wax whistles you get on Halloween? A sugar kazoo? What?


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RealNC
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Re: Subtle Creepy

Post by RealNC »

pinback wrote:Are we just ignoring the fact that Brian just announced publicly that he thinks Fred's 12-year-old daughter is hot?
The other choice is implying that she's ugly.

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Post by Flack »

Fred: Hey, Brian. I've been meaning to ask you... what exactly did you mean by that comment on Facebook about my daughter?

Brian: Oh, haha! Boy, are you going to be in trouble. I noticed in the picture that her face looks like a pepperoni pizza and was thinking about all the massive insecurities she's going to have from her acne. I also noticed she has a terrible overbite and maybe crooked teeth, and was thinking about all thousands of dollars you're going to have in dental bills.

Fred: Haha! Whew! I thought you were saying that she was hot!
"I failed a savings throw and now I am back."

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Post by loafergirl »

Tdarcos wrote:
pinback wrote:Do you realize that that is the least-funny post anyone has ever posted in the history of the internet?
No, I think there have been worse.
quote]

I'd offer up "the daily bad name for n abortion clinic" but... it was pretty funny. In AWFUL taste, but funny.
1, 2, 5!
3 sir...
3!

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Post by Tdarcos »

loafergirl wrote:I'd offer up "the daily bad name for n abortion clinic" but... it was pretty funny. In AWFUL taste, but funny.
(February 19, 2017)

Happy Sunday! Welcome to the Daily Bad Name for an Abortion Clinic mailing list.

Today's Bad Name for an Abortion Clinic in Czechslovakia is:

"Cancelled Czechs!"
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Post by loafergirl »

or it's time to Czech out of the womb.

*shaking my head in shame while simultaneously smiling*
1, 2, 5!
3 sir...
3!

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Post by Tdarcos »

(February 23, 2017)

Happy Thursday! Welcome to the Daily Bad Name for an Abortion Clinic mailing list.

Today's Bad Name for an Abortion Clinic is:

"Welcome to the Reverse Texas abortion clinic" because in Texas they're real big on killing people, they'll execute anything, sane, insane, normal, moron, man, woman or anything EXCEPT fetuses!
Alan Francis wrote a book containing everything men understand about women. It consisted of 100 blank pages.

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Post by pinback »

All the best jokes require lots of explanation afterwards.
I don't have to say anything. I'm a doctor, too.

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