The Official JC at Classic Games Expo 2003 Thread!

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Post by Ice Cream Jonsey » Thu Jul 17, 2003 12:50 pm

Confidential to Roody Y., and T. Debaser:

Bruce's hotel room is $40 for Thursday night, and then $60 for Friday and Saturday. I am all down with what Pinback was saying, but fuck. It's $145 for Saturday night at the Monte Carlo. Fuck that.

So the question is: should we all get one big room, or get separate rooms, or what? Do you guys want to make your own reservations or should we all grab a three-bedroom suite?
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Post by Roody_Yogurt » Thu Jul 17, 2003 12:58 pm

I have no qualms about sharing a room with multiple other people for financial reasons. Whatever people decide on is fine by me, and I'll room with whomever.

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Post by Worm » Thu Jul 17, 2003 1:15 pm

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:I bought a new, shrink-wrapped copy of Crystal Castles for the 2600. I am hoping that the "father" of Bentley Bear will sign it. But!!! Do I take the shrinkwrap off or not?

SOMEONE HELP ME;..
Take off the shrink wrap when he signs it then go down to EB or somewhere with a shrink wrapper and ask them to do it for you.
Good point Bobby!

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Post by Ice Cream Jonsey » Thu Jul 17, 2003 1:29 pm

Worm wrote:
Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:I bought a new, shrink-wrapped copy of Crystal Castles for the 2600. I am hoping that the "father" of Bentley Bear will sign it. But!!! Do I take the shrinkwrap off or not?

SOMEONE HELP ME;..
Take off the shrink wrap when he signs it then go down to EB or somewhere with a shrink wrapper and ask them to do it for you.
Hey... that's not bad, Berkowski. Not bad at all.

gg
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Post by bruce » Thu Jul 17, 2003 7:32 pm

Jethro Q. Walrustitty wrote:Sorry, I'm all into the whole classic gaming thing - but I'm not driving all the way across the country to see the producer of "ET The Extraterrestrial" for the Atari 2600. That guy's brave to show his face; he ought to be taken out and beat like a drum. Especially with the conceit of using three names.
Yeah, but he also did <i>Raiders of the Lost Ark</i> (not to everyone's taste, I know, but I dig it), and <i>Yar's Revenge</i>.

Me, the person I'm looking forward to beating to a bloody pulp is Bill Kunkel.

Bruce

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Post by Worm » Fri Jul 18, 2003 6:46 am

Cut off one of his fingers ... I bet it would go for loads on Ebay.
Good point Bobby!

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Post by bruce » Fri Jul 18, 2003 7:57 am

So, I'm staying at the Plaza, because it's half the price of staying on the Strip.

I ask again: Pinback, are you bringing Shortcake? Obviously Vegas makes her all horny.

Bruce

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Post by Ice Cream Jonsey » Fri Jul 18, 2003 8:22 am

bruce wrote:I ask again: Pinback, are you bringing Shortcake? Obviously Vegas makes her all horny.
He banned himself until July 25th or so.
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Post by Jethro Q. Walrustitty » Fri Jul 18, 2003 9:32 am

Why the Bill Kunkel rage? "Electronic Gaming" magazine was great Back In The Day.

Granted, he may have been a tool straight out of the Craftsman catalog since then, but he was OK in the "classic gaming" era.

Imagine Jonsey's disappointment when he takes the shrinkwrap off and discovers that someone else already opened it, removed the original contents, put in a copy of E.T. and a note saying "sucker!", and put new shrink-wrap on it.

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Post by Ice Cream Jonsey » Fri Jul 18, 2003 9:45 am

Jethro Q. Walrustitty wrote:Why the Bill Kunkel rage? "Electronic Gaming" magazine was great Back In The Day.
Bruce can tell the story better than I can, but the guy essentially dismissed the entire Infocom collection with what amounted to a "meh." Anyone who can do that doesn't belong writing about anything in the entertainment software industry. A company that NEVER MADE A BAD GAME getting dismissed like that? Oh, you best believe it be ON, brothaman.

Imagine Jonsey's disappointment when he takes the shrinkwrap off and discovers that someone else already opened it, removed the original contents, put in a copy of E.T. and a note saying "sucker!", and put new shrink-wrap on it.
That will never happen, as I will never allow my precioussss to ever be opened.

Last night I was clearing out all the game boxes that I had accumulated in the four years of living at this place. The new style boxes are so small that they really aren't displayable, so I chucked all of those (word, Postal 2, Mafia, and I Was An Atomic Mutant). I was storing the boxes in two places, but the first cut went like this:

CHUCKED:
Star Trek: Generations
Star Trek: Away Team
No One Lives Forever
Fallout: Tactics
Baldur's Gate: Throne of Bhaal


SAVED:
Max Payne
Giants: Citizen Kabuto
Serious Sam
Anachronox

I was real hesitant on Anachronox. Max Payne is just a kick-ass box (ditto Giants). Serious Sam I kept because I knew it would irritate Jeff.
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Post by bruce » Fri Jul 18, 2003 2:18 pm

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:
Jethro Q. Walrustitty wrote:Why the Bill Kunkel rage? "Electronic Gaming" magazine was great Back In The Day.
Bruce can tell the story better than I can, but the guy essentially dismissed the entire Infocom collection with what amounted to a "meh." Anyone who can do that doesn't belong writing about anything in the entertainment software industry. A company that NEVER MADE A BAD GAME getting dismissed like that? Oh, you best believe it be ON, brothaman.
The Kunkel Review, with interlinear comment by Andrew Boyd, can be found here.

I'll just leave it with:
Bill Kunkel, Fucking Moron wrote: These games should have been upgraded, with artwork and menus of available commands, etc
Bruce

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Post by Ice Cream Jonsey » Fri Jul 18, 2003 2:27 pm

Debaser, Roody: What days are you guys planning on staying? I am there Thursday, Friday and Saturday, but I'll be checking out early Sunday. If you guys are there Sunday, it may be better if I don't get a three-person room, what with the wacky hijinx involved with me no longer being there. I think that Roody, at least, was going to be there all day Sunday, right?

But let me know and I'll finally make a "command decision" here.
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Post by Ice Cream Jonsey » Fri Jul 18, 2003 2:31 pm

bruce wrote:The Kunkel Review, with interlinear comment by Andrew Boyd, can be found here.
Jesus. I had never read that before. There are some real whoppers there, like stating that HHGG closely follows the book and so forth.
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Post by Roody_Yogurt » Fri Jul 18, 2003 2:48 pm

I'm getting there Thursday night and leaving Sunday morning.

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Post by bruce » Fri Jul 18, 2003 5:09 pm

Getting there Thursday night, leaving Sunday afternoon. Thursday-Saturday in The Plaza.

I wonder if Pinner will be bringing Shortcake. I just want to <s>shoot a load on her tits</s> know.

Bruce

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Post by Ice Cream Jonsey » Fri Jul 18, 2003 7:07 pm

Benjamin "Pinback" Safeway Parrish has informed me that he is not bringing Shortcake.

I think his words were along the lines of, "I am not bringing here there. I am not bringing her anywhere any longer."

Unfortunately, I will be without net access at home when I go to sleep tonight. And Ben has "banned" himself until the 21st. So there will be a few days' lag as the populace wonders: did she kill herself, did she dump ole Spinners there, or did Spinners himself perform a cold, calculating dumping??! It's like playing a game of "221B Baker Street" without all those bothersome deductions!
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Post by bruce » Sat Jul 19, 2003 6:50 am

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:Benjamin "Pinback" Safeway Parrish has informed me that he is not bringing Shortcake.

I think his words were along the lines of, "I am not bringing here there. I am not bringing her anywhere any longer."
Well, then.

Maybe she's available for one of <i>us</i> to bring. I mean, we know (a) Vegas makes her horny, and (b) she puts out. So really, who would be a more appropriate guest?

Well, I guess the chick from my dream who looked like Julianne Marguelies (sp? almost certainly!) and who found encyclopedic knowledge of the Intellivision a real turn-on. But I guess I was confining myself to the set of "chicks who might actually exist."

And I'm surprised and disappointed that a certain gimmick regular didn't applaud me for BRINGING TEH TIT-FUCKING CONTENT.

Adam

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Post by Jethro Q. Walrustitty » Mon Jul 21, 2003 12:43 pm

Geez, listen to you people, getting uptight over what Kunkel said.

OK, it was riddled with factual inaccuracies vis-a-vis the games themselves - I mean, everyone knows Planetfall came first (hell, I remember dropping $50 on it like it was yesterday - errr, I remember the day like it was yesterday, not the game like it was like another game called "Yesterday") - but really, you have to admit that you "IF fans" are a fringe element. Perhaps the "International Pack of Parachute Pants Fans" get upset when The Gap refuses to sell paracute pants in the year 2003. Perhaps the "O2-4eVeR Club" is boycotting Activision for not working on "K.C. Munchkin in the 21st Centry" to be released as an Odyssey2 exclusive. Maybe even the "Great Otterscrubbers of Waco, Texas" group is complaining to that Bryant Gumbel snubbed otterscrubbers as being "needy" a few weeks ago.

But come on! Face facts! Text adventures are not a viable commercial gaming genre in this day and age. Is it right? Who knows. Is it a slap in the face to Scott Adams and Steve Meretszky? (However the fuck you spell his last name.) Perhaps. But time marches on. Notice that Sierra isn't busy churning out the latest King's Quest or Space Quest or Leisure Suit Larry - and any update that are coming are 3D-accelerated and full of pretty graphical shininess.

To try to sell a text adventure in this era would meet with as much success as re-packaging Ultima I, leaving the game as is, and selling it. It may still be a blast to play, but Joe Consumer doesn't care. Hey, I like text adventures. I think I may like 'em better without graphics, too. But, if I'm at the computer store, and am looking at buying either "Planetfall 3" or "Half-Life 2"... well, sorry, text adventure, but I just can't justify it.

Anyways, nothing wrong with fringe stuff. I like fringe stuff. But I'm not going to stomp up and down with fury when AutoWeek does a feature on the Lotus Elan (of which I own one, for those who don't know me) and they say "Like so many Lotuses, the Elan was superior in design, mediocre in execution, and inferior in the support given to its dealers and owners." (Actually, it was superior in execution, too.)

Would a glowing Infocom review from an original Electronic Games magazine help soothe some of the bruised text-loving egos around here?

Serious Sam still sucks, BTW. On X-Play, they showed a bit of footage from their new game. I forgot what it was called, but it looked and played exactly like Serious Sam, and was soundly smacked down for it. "Raging Rick" or "Maniacal Mel" or "Pissed-Off Pete" or "Thoughtful Theodore" or something like that. Ugh.

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Post by Ice Cream Jonsey » Mon Jul 21, 2003 1:14 pm

Ahhhhhhhhhrrrgh, we should probably all get our own rooms there. I think it would be cheaper.
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Post by bruce » Mon Jul 21, 2003 1:23 pm

Jethro Q. Walrustitty wrote: But come on! Face facts! Text adventures are not a viable commercial gaming genre in this day and age.
Yeah, but in '96 Activision presumably made a reasonable amount of money by doing the rerelease. That's not the point.

My argument with the man is that to say, "well, I guess they'd be OK if they had a GUI and some sounds," is that he's COMPLETELY MISSED THE FUCKING POINT. It's like saying "You know, <i>The Maltese Falcon</i> was all right, but it's really time for a rereleased version in COLOR. And we should probably add some shit blowing up. And that falcon thing? Too dated; let's make it, oh, I dunno, <i>The North Korean Suitcase Nuke.</i> And Peter Lorre as Joel Cairo? Nah: we need Peta Wilson as a ROBOT ASSASSIN FROM THE FUTURE."

Bruce

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