Jolt Country

AArdvark wrote: ↑

Wed Aug 14, 2019 4:50 pm

Gland By Me.

I love alcohol

Jizaboz wrote: ↑

Thu Aug 08, 2019 9:53 pm

*A phantom leg skips in a horrific fashion towards the bed*
“Paaaauuul
What the fuck!?
“Why did you leave me behind?”

AArdvark wrote: ↑

Sat Aug 10, 2019 11:25 am

Maybe I'll do a whole series, like The Butterheads. It'll be called the adventures of Paul's Leg. Not like he's using it anymore.

I suppose I should laugh at this, but I'm not sure. I suppose that, for a reaction to this, I guess I'm stumped.

Maybe I'll do a whole series, like The Butterheads. It'll be called the adventures of Paul's Leg. Not like he's using it anymore.

THE
REPURPOSE
AARDVARK

Now I have to do leg cartoons.

”Paul?”

Who is that? You are no nurse! You are no spirit!!

*A phantom leg skips in a horrific fashion towards the bed*

“Paaaauuul”

What the fuck!?

“Why did you leave me behind?”

How the fuck are you even talking?! You don’t have vocal cords! Shouldn’t you have been disposed of or misused in a pathology lab by now!?

“I have come for..”

What, my SOUL?! As if I REALLY believe in a fucking soul. I mean.. well.. I am talking to you right now so..

“SILENCE. Listen. For once. I have come for half of your next helping of stuffed pepper they bring you.”

But.. but I’ll be hungry! I should not have to sacrifice part of myself to YOU, a mere one third of my lower torso just because you fucked up! In fact, if anything I should be mad you are even demanding things from the body you have disconne..

“It’s a simple deal really. Leave half the plate as a ritual and I will make your wish come true.”

My wish?

“Next time someone doesn’t close the door on their way out, I’ll round-house that bitch all the way to the nurses station.”

Paul this is your subconscious again, why would anyone want to Lynch a toilrtt? They're white.

You really are clueless, aren't you? Plumbing fixtures can be purchased in other colorz. Don't you remember, the time I gave my sister $50 because I wanted her to order a black toilet for the bathroom? And it really did look nice.

What do you mean, I'm clueless? I just forgot.

Yeah, well for over 10 years now when I have dreams you still have me walking around. Not once have I had a dream where I was in a wheelchair. And you still haven't come to terms with my amputation, I still feel a nonexistent knee, leg, foot, and toes at the end of my stump.

What's an amputation?

I would have thought 'Ty-d-bowl swing" would have been funnier as "Toilet commits suicide" or "A toilet is lynched."