by Flack » Mon Mar 05, 2018 4:15 pm
Okay, I'll play.
Palmer's Pick-up (1999)
Forgive the brevity and sloppiness of this review. Trust me, it's all it deserves. I don't remember any of the characters' names, but I remember some of the actors.
Robert Carradine (Palmer) and his friend own a shipping company. They are hired by Soupy Sales (playing an old man in a wheelchair) the day before Christmas to deliver a crate from California to the man's friend (Garrett Morris) in Florida. Soupy Sales refuses to tell them what's in the crate, but does tell them that if Morris doesn't dump it into the Bermuda Triangle by midnight, Y2K, it will mean the end of the earth. Robert Carradine suspects the crate contains the remains of Morton Downey, Jr., a deceased talk show host who may or may not have also been the devil. (In the movie, not in real life.)
Carradine and his partner drive cross country and run into a zillion stupid obstacles, mostly in the form of people. There are a couple of hitmen, a man-hating Rosanna Arquette, a Siamese twin made up of Grace Jones and some white guy, and a bunch of other dummies. This movie is so bad it feels like you are driving across the country in real time.
The two morons arrive in Florida with minutes to spare, but end up screwing up the delivery and open the crate instead of getting it to Morris. This is the last shot of the film.
(That's the earth.)
Okay, I'll play.
[b]Palmer's Pick-up (1999)[/b]
[img]https://i.imgur.com/gJ4KU26.png[/img]
Forgive the brevity and sloppiness of this review. Trust me, it's all it deserves. I don't remember any of the characters' names, but I remember some of the actors.
Robert Carradine (Palmer) and his friend own a shipping company. They are hired by Soupy Sales (playing an old man in a wheelchair) the day before Christmas to deliver a crate from California to the man's friend (Garrett Morris) in Florida. Soupy Sales refuses to tell them what's in the crate, but does tell them that if Morris doesn't dump it into the Bermuda Triangle by midnight, Y2K, it will mean the end of the earth. Robert Carradine suspects the crate contains the remains of Morton Downey, Jr., a deceased talk show host who may or may not have also been the devil. (In the movie, not in real life.)
Carradine and his partner drive cross country and run into a zillion stupid obstacles, mostly in the form of people. There are a couple of hitmen, a man-hating Rosanna Arquette, a Siamese twin made up of Grace Jones and some white guy, and a bunch of other dummies. This movie is so bad it feels like you are driving across the country in real time.
The two morons arrive in Florida with minutes to spare, but end up screwing up the delivery and open the crate instead of getting it to Morris. This is the last shot of the film.
[img]https://i.imgur.com/uJyFrPg.png[/img]
(That's the earth.)