[quote=AArdvark post_id=98555 time=1539295006 user_id=20]
Someone needs to empty the Big Gulps full of urine.
[/quote]
Don't forget the dead roaches.

[quote="Casual Observer" post_id=98549 time=1539292561 user_id=77]
[quote="Ice Cream Jonsey" post_id=97638 time=1534021153 user_id=3]
I thought search was broken for threads created before the move to phpBB3 (number of posts RetroRomper has made since asking for it, by the way: still zero). How on earth did you find this, CO?
[/quote]
no, man, the searched worked. Searched for fight club (no quotations) and this was the top list.
[/quote]

Once something gets bumped, it enters the search engine.

Someone needs to empty the Big Gulps full of urine.

[quote="Ice Cream Jonsey" post_id=97638 time=1534021153 user_id=3]
I thought search was broken for threads created before the move to phpBB3 (number of posts RetroRomper has made since asking for it, by the way: still zero). How on earth did you find this, CO?
[/quote]
no, man, the searched worked. Searched for fight club (no quotations) and this was the top list.

[quote="dr tacos"]You should have thought of that before you got married and even worse, went overseas to adopt a child.[/quote]
Tacos, luckily you'll never experience the misery of living with a significant other who is ALWAYS THERE whenever you're home. You probably think it would be a good thing.

That... that was the point, Paul. You just explained the subtext that everyone else immediately understood. I don't like when you do that, Paul.

[quote=pinback post_id=97630 time=1533941899 user_id=5]
Also, I would like to point out that this thread was me whining about how I was spending these nights alone at home, and sixteen years later, spending a night alone at home has become an unreachable nirvana that I dare not even dream about.
[/quote]

You should have thought of that before you got married and even worse, went overseas to adopt a child.

I thought search was broken for threads created before the move to phpBB3 (number of posts RetroRomper has made since asking for it, by the way: still zero). How on earth did you find this, CO?

Also, I would like to point out that this thread was me whining about how I was spending these nights alone at home, and sixteen years later, spending a night alone at home has become an unreachable nirvana that I dare not even dream about.

Wow, that's the greatest necro in the history of BBSes.

https://youtu.be/jx41zAud_Uo

I read news all the time but this article is right out of the classic airport scene in Fight Club. I had no idea that it was remotely true that dildos can be flagged as bombs.

[url]https://bgr.com/2018/08/09/sex-toys-travel-airport-shut-down-bombs[/url]

So what's your power animal?

How can you not remember me? I HAVE PORNOGRAPHIC MAGAZINES AND AMYL NITRATE, fer chrissakes!!!

Also, I have a do-rag covering my head because the chemo has taken hold!

Also, I am now dead!

[quote="Chloe"]Jesus Christ, haven't any of you people seen Fight Club? I'm CHLOE!!! (I just don't know for how long!!!)[/quote]

Of all the characters in Fight Club, we end up having Chloe here? Who was Chloe anyway? I take it somebody from the group-help scene at the beginning. But I can't find any additional information on her.

Jesus Christ, haven't any of you people seen Fight Club? I'm CHLOE!!! (I just don't know for how long!!!)

[quote="Chloe"]Well, I'm still here. But I don't know for how long. That's as much assurance as the doctors can give me. But I have some good news. I'm no longer afraid of dying.

But I am in a pretty lonely place right now. No one will have sex with me. I'm so close to the end and all I want is to get laid for the last time.

I have pornographic magazines and amyl nitrate...[/quote]

See, this I don't understand. I mean, if you're terminally ill (and, look, my apologies if I'm treading on some sensitive Jolt Country backstory here, and that Chloe is both not trolling and not someone who, despite her (?) post, really wants to look for the upside of a death sentence; but hey, I'm an asshole, I slung it with the best back in the Old Days before alt.tasteless sucked and Usenet went to hell. So, uh, if you get offended, you're welcome to blow me. Line forms to the left.) it seems like that'd be the *best* time to indulge in all that risky--indeed nearly suicidal--sex you never dared to before; I mean, I'm talking quintuple-anal gang-bangs with chancre-ridden Hatian junkies kind of risky. As to the "no one will have sex with me" thing, from the other side, shit, here's a relationship that *can't* have any long term strings attached, right? Isn't that what guys claim to want? I mean, here you have not just guaranteed nookie for a while, but then a sob story to help you bag the *next* one who comes along, right? Imagine three months later: "I had a girlfriend, but...<choke>...she died...<sniff>...." "Aww, poor baby. Let me comfort you with dark chocolate, good Scotch, and blowjobs." (Disclaimer: I've never tried this and it probably doesn't work that well.)

And hey, if no one subscribes to that philosophy and therefore no one will satisfy your bestial desires for free, what are you saving up for? Retirement? I mean, shit, give me $50, some poppers, and a bottle of cheap Orcish gin, and there's not much I'm not up for, myself.

Oh shit. Did I say that out loud?

Bruce

Actually, I chose (after a delightful visit with my grandparents) to "kick it in the crib" this particular Saturday.

There was a certain computer game that needed tending to, you see. I won't bore you with a whole description of the game, but let's just say that it rhymes with: "Goreplaft Spree!"

Yeah, so... didja go out, then?

Saturday night.

"Party night", as it's sometimes called. The one night every week you wait for so you absolutely *have to* go out and let loose in an uncontained expression of human freedom, fun, and perhaps a little lasciviousness (if all goes well!)

Yes, Saturday night. The essence of life. The world beckons you to let it embrace you within its endless grasp on Saturday night.

Yes sir.

Hm.

Slider Pie? I hardly even know 'er!

HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!! ! ! ! !! ! ! !

I forgot the best part!!!!

Afterwards, the "Pang" kid goes to a Mexican place and orders something that looks like a pie, but with nachos and sour cream and black olives and so forth. SO I called it a "Mexican Slider Pie." And sure enough while I went to take a nap he was at his house with my brother and Sailer and the sludge slid right out of him. Haw!