WIP: Ultima parody

[Chris H]

Hi all,

I'm not dead :) I've been very busy, and I also want to put together a better demo adventure before the next big ACK release.

This adventure, which I've started a little bit of, will be a parody of the Ultima series. Rather than try to come up with all the gags myself, I thought I'd open this up as a thread -- if you can think of anything anywhere in the series that is just begging to be made fun of, please feel free to mention it. :)

- Chris

[jjsonick]

Hm, I know ICJ is currently plowing through U4 (in an impressively non-virtuous fashion), so he should have some good things to suggest, but off the top of my head:

- One flaw of U4 is once you find out how important the keywords 'RUNE' and 'MANTRA' are, you can you run around hitting every random NPC with those keywords to get important info, even before you've been told 'Ask so-and-so for the rune'. So maybe some insulting responses to those keywords tried out on non-appropriate npcs.
- Since it's a long-standing tradition to try to kill Lord British in the games, maybe have the Lord British character instantly expire whenever the player gets near him (and his wizards and jesters give you important info he normally would and are constantly having to resurrect him).
- A spinoff of above idea: instead of killing British being an attempt to exploit a bug, have it be the stated goal of the game. "Assassination Target: LB"
- Have the reagents needed for spells be bits of paper rpg equipment: twenty sided die, graph paper, dwarf figurines, illegitimately altered character sheets, etc
- Silver Serpent Snake Oil Salesman?
- Have the sci-fi elements of U1 and U2 invade Britannia, mad that they've been kicked out of the rest of the series for "so-called world consistency"
- Have the time-travelling dwarfs from 'Time Bandits' impound all the moongates for intellectual property infringement (Garriott has talked about how the time holes and map from 'Time Bandits' inspired the moongates). Perhaps the player has to settle this legal issue with God and finds the Guardian hanging out with Him.
- Family drama between Mondrian, Minax and their 'strangely cold-hearted' son Exodus (who writes gothic-y poetry on punchcards)

[Chris H]

Hahaha I love the idea of the dysfunctional family with Mondain, Minax, and Exodus... I can totally picture him as some kind of emo kid with behavior problems. Perhaps I can have Jerry Springer step into a moongate somewhere along the way...

(I do remember the tradition of killing LB, I remember editing the U4 towne disk with a sector editor to place a ship behind his throne so I could give him a broadside. It worked, by the way.)

I wasn't aware of the Time Bandits connection, I'll have to look into that. :)

[foody]

* grin * Heheh I always wondered what is this emo-boy thing? Why do people hate emo boy? What does emo boy represent? Are they even gay at all? If not why they look so..feminine? Here is the big splashing question:

Why does the entire world hate emo-boy?
_________________
I WANT ULTIMA 7 OR ULTMIA 6 CONSTRUCTION SET! I WILL DO ANYTHING! PAY ANYTHING! GIVE ANYTHING !

[Chris H]

To open up the question a little further: I would expect any parody of early Ultimas to be a parody of the age they occurred in, so I'm looking for good 80s references to include as well. :)

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

- Everyone going apoplectic with rage when asked name or job

- Having NPCs ask those two questions amongst each other

- Have a race of Powder Kegs that fight each other by lighting humans on fire

- A comment by a mayor concerning a murder mystery like at the beginning of Ultima 7, that instead has the Avatar investigating the hundreds of thousands of other creatures he killed

- Having some NPCs argue about what the 8th virtue should be (or, one more than are commonly accepted) with one of them arguing for "beauty" or something that isn't stricly a virtue

Argh, I think what you guys suggested is better. :)
_________________
the dark and gritty...Ice Cream Jonsey!

[baf]

One suggestion: the sovereign should be named Lord Texan.

[jjsonick]

I love Lord Texan. And ICJ, I like the idea of the Powder Keg race throwing flaming humans at each other - there could even be a part of Britannia overcome with a Powder Keg Civil War (the new Bloody (or Powdered) Plains?).

I also like two NPCs endlessly asking each other 'NAME?' 'JOB?'. Perhaps they get stuck in a endless loop that threatens to crash the entire realm unless the player can release them from their loop.

[baf]

I'm imagining some powder keg describing the context of the war: "Both sides had spoiling for a fight for years! It was inevitable that some little thing would provoke hostilities, and that the violence would spread extremely quickly once it started. It was like a... a... shoot, if only there were some appropriate metaphor."

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

Gyaah-hahahaha!
_________________
the dark and gritty...Ice Cream Jonsey!

[Chris H]

I've got most of the intro sequence put together, and I've got the essential concept fleshed out now... it's going to be yet another "someone has come along and corrupted the virtues yet again and someone has to go from town to town and set everyone straight because Lord British can't get out of his chair and do it himself" Ultima.

You guys must have had some serious fun with powder kegs that I never discovered in my own travels, by the way... :)

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

Yeah, the powder keg was just a conduit to mischief of all forms. They were very powerful, killing many of the creatures I remember encountering instantly, and they gave you the chance to deploy them, light them, and run away giggling. The monsters / townspeople / avatars for Richard Garriot did not react to a lit powder keg in Ultima 6, if I remember right, just one that blew up on them. Of course, in most cases, the people involved were slain so they could hardly raise any objections.
_________________
the dark and gritty...Ice Cream Jonsey!

[Chris H]

The main map is done!



If anyone is interested in this map for their own project, let me know. It's pretty much tile-for-tile matched with the Ultima V map (with some of the lesser islands, the ones that did not feature in Ultima IV, left out)

It will be included in the ULTIMA kit on the next release.

[Biffsnot]

Pretty astounding version of the map there. Very nice. Must have been some tedious work :)

[Chris H]

Work is continuing on this game, in between releasing patches. :) What I can't decide is what to call it. Should I just continue the series where they left off, and call it Ultima 10? Or should I squeeze it in a little earlier in the series, maybe call it Ultima 4 1/2? Or something else entirely?

[jjsonick]

Hmm, I think it depends what the majority of your parody is focusing on. For example, if you're using the Mondrain-Minax-Exodus family idea, and not anything on the Guardian, then something like 4.5 or 3.5 would work. But if you include lots of references to the later Ultimas as well, then Ultima 10 (maybe with an exclamation mark: Ultima X!) could work.

Alternate idea: ULTIMACK or ULTIACK ;)

[Chris H]

Okay, it will be Ultima IV part 2. Kind of like Serpent's Isle was Ultima VII part 2, only without Shamino cross-dressing. Maybe. :)

[Chris H]

Okay, I've settled on title, intro, plot, quest objectives, and I've got all the town maps done. I still need to do dungeons, keeps, and of course all the conversations and quests and whatnot.

[jjsonick]

Hahaha!! Those two screens are great! Can't wait...

[Biffsnot]

Absolutely the best idea ever. I agree with jj that those images are great and add a lot of character to the idea. Made me laugh, that's for sure.