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Help me Robb Sherwin, you're my only hope!
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Ms. Britta P.
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PostPosted: Wed Jun 12, 2002 6:27 pm    Post subject: Help me Robb Sherwin, you're my only hope! Reply with quote

hey ro--

oh, btw, this isn't some lame truthtelling persona, its actually me, britta p(ratt). yes, i do in fact exist.

robb, i was wondering where i could find the 'a crimson spring' files? the links for them in the software page aren't connecting. help help! i have found a love for 'if' - thank you horus p. truthteller, my honesty-spewing boyfriend.

i really enjoyed kicking shitwank's ass in 'cdj.'

sorry, my shift button isn't operational. also, i hope you don't mind me dropping this q in here as opposed to the other forums. is crimson spring old enough now to be considered retro gaming?

-britta
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Ice Cream Jonsey



Joined: 27 Apr 2002
Posts: 20088
Location: Colorado

PostPosted: Wed Jun 12, 2002 6:46 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Well, I can't tell you how happy I am that you do, in fact, exist. The world is a much better place for it.

Here's a link to the game:

http://www.ifarchive.org/if-archive/games/hugo/scourge.zip

You then just need to drag the scourge.hex file onto the hewin.exe file. I do hope that you enjoy it!
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Ms. Britta P.



Joined: 12 Jun 2002
Posts: 4

PostPosted: Mon Jun 17, 2002 10:39 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thank you so much.
IF really is fantastic. Horus and I can simply spend hours upon hours playing your IF games.

Are you available for questions if We get stuck?
I might have a few Q's from time to time.

~it is so great to exist


Last edited by Ms. Britta P. on Thu Jun 20, 2002 10:36 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Lex



Joined: 27 Apr 2002
Posts: 971
Location: Scotland, Bonnie

PostPosted: Mon Jun 17, 2002 11:32 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

You're gay.
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Ice Cream Jonsey



Joined: 27 Apr 2002
Posts: 20088
Location: Colorado

PostPosted: Tue Jun 18, 2002 12:25 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Lex wrote:
You're gay.


I should note that Ms Britta P has in fact posted from an IP address that is uniquely hers. (We have lots of gimmick posters around here, it should be noted.) So this is either an elaborate ruse or something else entirely.

Quote:

Are you available for questions if We get stuck?
I might have a few Q's from time to time.


You betcha!
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Ms. Britta P.



Joined: 12 Jun 2002
Posts: 4

PostPosted: Tue Jun 18, 2002 8:40 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:

I should note that Ms Britta P has in fact posted from an IP address that is uniquely hers. (We have lots of gimmick posters around here, it should be noted.) So this is either an elaborate ruse or something else entirely.


Thank you Robb, for defending me. I can guarantee that I am a Unique Individual. Can't you tell by the way we write?
I had this strange feeling that people would have trouble believing that I was real.

oh well, I can deal with it.

Also, the pictures, are in fact me. They are not necessarily the pictures I would have chosen, but they are me.

Quote:
You're gay.


Are you just that unsure of yourself, that you have to go around making acusations about people? I would look at yourself first, next time.

By the way, thanks Robb for being available. I am sure that we will get stuck at some point.


Last edited by Ms. Britta P. on Thu Jun 20, 2002 10:35 pm; edited 2 times in total
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Lex



Joined: 27 Apr 2002
Posts: 971
Location: Scotland, Bonnie

PostPosted: Tue Jun 18, 2002 9:41 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Sorry, just got bored; it's been over a year since I was simply abusive to someone on a 'board. I apologise sincerely.
I'd like to point out that ACS is very cool, but does have multiple endings; if you play it through and find yourself manic-depressive try playing it through again.
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Lex



Joined: 27 Apr 2002
Posts: 971
Location: Scotland, Bonnie

PostPosted: Tue Jun 18, 2002 9:43 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

And I never got out of the Goddamn Snot Cage! Pipe-breathe? PIPE-BREATHE? OKAY! FINE! LOOKSIE! I CAN DO THAT WITH THE PIPE AND THE BREATHING! OH NOS? A MEMBRAIANE? WHATEVER WILL I DO NOW!!?!?!!? Oooh I know I will CHOKE TO DEATH ROFL LOL ROOFLES!!!
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Ms. Britta P.



Joined: 12 Jun 2002
Posts: 4

PostPosted: Tue Jun 18, 2002 9:48 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

NO hard feelings LEx, I understand that it is fun to be rude sometimes. I often find myself attracted to this activity. I am just glad that i finally get to post on the board.

thanks for the tips, i am sure that i will use them.
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Ice Cream Jonsey



Joined: 27 Apr 2002
Posts: 20088
Location: Colorado

PostPosted: Tue Jun 18, 2002 10:42 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Lex wrote:
And I never got out of the Goddamn Snot Cage! Pipe-breathe? PIPE-BREATHE? OKAY! FINE! LOOKSIE! I CAN DO THAT WITH THE PIPE AND THE BREATHING! OH NOS? A MEMBRAIANE? WHATEVER WILL I DO NOW!!?!?!!? Oooh I know I will CHOKE TO DEATH ROFL LOL ROOFLES!!!


Look, MR CLEVAR GUY, you have to put the pipe THROUGH the snot cage. Then you breath through the pipe. Maybe you're content to skulk about other people's games and solve "creative" puzzles that really make you "think" and win "awards" and are "classics" but that's not something I'm "competent" at.

At least the bad guy actually tries to kill you, though, which places it far beyond the live-action "Batman" television shows that came out in the 60s. OK, that's not much to be proud of, but nevertheless... is.

So if you haven't solved that one, and didn't finish Fallacy of Dawn and presumably did not play No Time To Squeal am I correct in presuming that the only game you saw the end of was CDJ?
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Lex



Joined: 27 Apr 2002
Posts: 971
Location: Scotland, Bonnie

PostPosted: Tue Jun 18, 2002 11:31 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Saied: Didn't think I'd bring this up, did you? Oh sorry, didn't think I'd "Pump it Up"? Well, you poor fool, I did, and with both endings. Take that!

Chicks Dig Jerks: Quite simply, the best game I have ever played, next to Lula: The Sexy Empire. It made me want to go the way I am in life; the drive to bring it to the silver screen, atleast, a screen, is what made me take the course I'm about to start. That and a desire to write and direct a mini-series based on Asimov's robot stories. And to bring to film Harry Harrison's "Deathworld" books. Okay, so CDJ was the deciding factor.

A Crimson Spring: A nice concept from someone who wanted to write fanfiction but knew he'd never get permission. Nice to see a childhood character come to life in a video game, though. First time you really did something you could be proud of in Hugo, so it's probably a landmark. A sweet idea, except for the fucking breathing thing. You think I didn't do that? I was informed politley -- repeatedly -- that a membrain kept stopping it. Maybe I didn't use Push or something, cos it sure as hell took a lot of effort to find the right statement just to make him try. Also couldn't save Mr. AIDS; probably because you're a sick, sick fuck and think he is Satan's Spawn for contracting the Gay Disease. But I could be mistaken about that.

No Time To Squeal: Very cool, could certainly have been brilliant if there'd been time to work on it til it felt absolutley perfect. Didn't understand the last puzzle or how it functioned. Maybe that's because I can play chess or some shit. But yeah, that was a very cool game.

Fallacy of Dawn: So very cool. Just never got round to playing it through in it's completed form; very fluid, very RPG-like, very cool. A sleek and sexy world with truly badass and believable characters. Very nice.
Ghost in the Mall: Will be very cool because it will say STARRING ALEX GRAY AS THAT EXCEPTIONALY COOL KILT-WEARING SLAYER & SEE THAT CHICK YOU WERE FANTASIZING ABOUT? WELL THAT'S HIS GIRLFRIEND IN REAL LIFE! on the front cover. This will also be the slogan. When Lynch & Romero snap up the rights in a few years he will cast Samuel L. Jackson as Leatherclad Funkster & the Oldskool Winona in Yenna's role. From then on Jackson will look up to me like a father figure & we will rule Hollywood with an iron fist, with him as my evil heir and right-hand-man. We will be INVINCIBLE!

Battle Field Alien Blast of Fire XP Alpha 2024: Will probably be very cool when we get around to it, may also be the first game to make full use of Hugo's AVI capabilities.

And there it is, straight from the chinchilla's mouth!
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Ice Cream Jonsey



Joined: 27 Apr 2002
Posts: 20088
Location: Colorado

PostPosted: Tue Jun 18, 2002 11:57 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

What the?! The AIDS Archer didn't contract that disease through homosexual relations, and even if he did there was no sentiment on my part that he contracted a "gay" disease. What the hell are you libelling me for, Gray? I'll see you in court for this! I mean, hell!

(I was just trying to depict someone who is quite outmatched when I put him in the game. Like, I'm sure that Hydro-Man is a fierce and fearsome villain to most regular, everyday people. But when he encounters the Human Torch, the Torch just evaporates him. You may think that a guy slinging AIDS-tipped arrows would be pretty bad-ass, but when he is fighting one guy who cannot get sick and another whose skin cannot be broken all of a sudden he becomes little more than a simpering clown shoe.)

You should finish FOD because the ending is one of the very few paragraphs that I have written in my life that I think came out right and that I am truly happy with. I can give you a level warp to the last chapter if you like.
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Lex



Joined: 27 Apr 2002
Posts: 971
Location: Scotland, Bonnie

PostPosted: Tue Jun 18, 2002 2:51 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

No, I'll do it. I have the power. Fueled by the most expensive Wheatabix in the world. But seriously, what the fuck am I supposed to do in the dorm, when Wraith is testing us*? I tried a lot, I'm sure. Destinct lack of anything "Real" to interact with, and I can't reason with him.

And I actually meant to take the piss out of these religious people (and Catholics) who insist that anyone with AIDS is evil. Please don't hate me. But never doubt again that I am a fan. You're a friend first, but it got that way because I love your work and you are a brilliant writer, and I respect that.

*This proves that he was a cool character- note how I accept him as my partner in this game.
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Ice Cream Jonsey



Joined: 27 Apr 2002
Posts: 20088
Location: Colorado

PostPosted: Thu Jun 20, 2002 10:44 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

(Spoilers for A Crimson Spring below.)


The dorm. You mean the Succubus one or the Anthraxia one? I presume the Succubus (Jenn) one. You just need to kiss her. I remember that it takes place like ten years before the present time, but she sees you as her age then so there's no pedophilia involved.

Or, wait, do you mean the AIDS Archer scene? Dammit. I can't recall which one is in the dorm. I am going to need to look at the source.

(downloads source)

Hey, I didn't find the Archer's scene yet. But I did find this:

Quote:

"'Career .356 batting average. Over 1,700 hits. And hit over .300 in the Championship. Oh, Did I mention? He also threw the World Series.

Shoeless Joe Jackson for Original Coors."

"Hey. Throw me another Coors. And Original Coors."


I should explain that, seeing how you live in a foreign country (a BETTER country than mine, seeing how they never ran Coors ads like that in yours).

Coors, for a while, had these terrible ads where they would take guys like Dan Patrick (an anchor for the show "Sportscenter") or Ahmad Rashad (who used to be a football player, but now is in the media and just gobbles the pole of other current athletes) and have them talk about some "mystery" player, usually one who isn't still playing. In any of the four major sports. They'd do one on baseball player Willie Mays, who played centerfield, and then Willie would say, "Hey, I'm going to catch me a Coors!!! LOL!" or something like that. So my brother Mike and I were talking about ones they could do to make the concept not one that makes people want to rip their eyeballs out from their heads, and I came up with the Shoeless Joe Jackson one. Joe Jackson helped throw the World Series in the 1910s (I forget the exact year). He and seven (IIRC) other members of the Chicago White Sox were banned from the game. So, of course, when having him do his ad he says, "Throw me another Coors."

Ah! Ah! Ah! But, at any rate.


For the Archer's scene you need to give him something to pump away with on his date. A longish, cylinder-type object, if you know what I mean. Essentially, you have to give him your lead pipe, so he uses that rather than his own personal "equipment," so that he does not contract any diseases.

The "providing NPCs with makeshift dildos" school of puzzle management has often been overlooked in IF, but hopefully as more people play ACS that kind of thing will really take off, and push aside such staples as "key-and-door" or "kill the troll."
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Lex



Joined: 27 Apr 2002
Posts: 971
Location: Scotland, Bonnie

PostPosted: Sat Jun 22, 2002 4:13 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

You are a very sick man. I didn't like that puzzle. In fact, I think it was downright terrible, and not at all Sherwinian. Why would 'venger give away the object he uses as a weapon throughout the game? And how do we get the pipe back to breath through the cage (This I assume you have thought through).
Oh well, it could be worse. He might, y'know, be gay or something.
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Ice Cream Jonsey



Joined: 27 Apr 2002
Posts: 20088
Location: Colorado

PostPosted: Tue Jun 25, 2002 9:28 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Lex wrote:
You are a very sick man. I didn't like that puzzle. In fact, I think it was downright terrible, and not at all Sherwinian. Why would 'venger give away the object he uses as a weapon throughout the game? And how do we get the pipe back to breath through the cage (This I assume you have thought through).


The use of those scenes probably, in retrospect, should have been deleted from the game. In all honesty, they were added in the last week because I thought the game would be way too short otherwise. Great decision, eh? I mean, sure, I wanted to have our hero's father make an appearance and all, but still.

You'd get your pipe back because it's okay to trust me. I don't make games good enough to intentionally piss anybody off and get away with it.


Quote:
Oh well, it could be worse. He might, y'know, be gay or something.


I don't think enough people hang out here to take offense at your transparent trolling. You'd probably have better luck at the Straight Dope forum.
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Lex



Joined: 27 Apr 2002
Posts: 971
Location: Scotland, Bonnie

PostPosted: Sat Jun 29, 2002 6:22 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Okay, fine. I'll calm down in that respect.*



*Provided there are no more n!33rs around.
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Last edited by Lex on Sat Jun 29, 2002 6:29 am; edited 2 times in total
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Lex



Joined: 27 Apr 2002
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Location: Scotland, Bonnie

PostPosted: Sat Jun 29, 2002 6:25 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hey - I missed one. I think I told you how much a truly, truly hate Revenger, right? Aside from that, I'm a big fan of all your work. It just rubbed me the wrong way, don't know why. Also: IT WAS FUNNEY COS HE WAS A CHICKEN AND HE CROSSED THE ROAD! HAHAHAH¨¨!¨£"¨%!11
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Lex



Joined: 27 Apr 2002
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PostPosted: Sat Jun 29, 2002 6:32 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Wow, I really am being a total prick in this thread. Sorry. I'll probably stop now.
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Ice Cream Jonsey



Joined: 27 Apr 2002
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Location: Colorado

PostPosted: Sat Jun 29, 2002 2:35 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Lex wrote:
Hey - I missed one. I think I told you how much a truly, truly hate Revenger, right? Aside from that, I'm a big fan of all your work. It just rubbed me the wrong way, don't know why. Also: IT WAS FUNNEY COS HE WAS A CHICKEN AND HE CROSSED THE ROAD! HAHAHAH¨¨!¨£"¨%!11


Look asscrack, that was the CHICKEN COMP. A COMPETITION ABOUT CHICKENS. Specifically answering the question WHY. When you take first prize in the RIGHT BASTARD competition coming up shortly by sleeping with the wife of the competition organizer and doing burnouts on his lawn then you'll know what I am talking about.

Also, Mom hates Revenger, so there is a line. Please go to the end of the line. Leave my mother alone, though. RIGHT BASTARD!
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