Sherdogg’s NFL week 9

 

An exciting week in the NFL. Steelers-Eagles at the top.

Power Rankings

1.   (1)    Philadelphia 

The Eagles move in to the top spot. Terrell Owens is the best FA pick up since the Eagles let Reggie 
White go to the Packers. It seems to matter NOT who runs the ball here. Pitt-Phil is easily the best game 
of the week and I will delighted with the results either way.
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2.   (1)    New England  

It had to end sooner or later, but would’ve thought it would be a blow out? They completely abandoned 
the running once Dillon was scratched. The Pats are human again, but they will probably bounce back 
strong.
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3.   (8) Pittsburgh    

Pittsburgh has a chance to be the toast of the NFL this week. Stat wags everywhere are digging up
record books for when a team knocked off consecutive undefeateds this late in a season. It probably
Involves Curly Lombardi and Vince Lamditka or some other dead guy. Anyhow, if Pittsburgh beats
the Eagles they have to be Super bowl favorites
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4.   (6)  NY Jets    

The Jets took care of their sh*t against Miami. They even managed to make the worst team in the
AFC even crappier by ending Junior Seau’s career. The important thing is that Moss, McCareiens 
and Chrebet contributed. That O-Line is something else plowing the way for 700 rushing yards.
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5.   (4)    Indianapolis

The Colts seem to have the most brutal of schedules. Mixed in between cupcakes like the Raiders 
are the Jags, Pats and resurgent Chiefs. They need to fix their d. Plain and simple. They have a
defensive coach and I believe he will fix it.
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6.   (3)   Minnesota         

Has the collapse started already? Probably not, the loss of Randy Moss and the implementations
of Michael Bennett has thrown the offense for a loop and the D has started to play like last year.
Not good. Mike Tice can’t survive another lull.
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7.   (9)    Atlanta  

A week after getting their heads kicked in to the tune of 100-10 by KC, coach Mora Jr. suggested
they go back to “momma’s house”. Whatever, they followed up their beating by sticking it to the
Broncos in Denver. Michael Vick at his best running and throwing. Oh...and was that a T.J. Duckett
sighting?
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8.   (5)  Denver         

Living in Colorado you get exposed to the ultimate in retardedness. The local media is already talking
about signing or trading for Drew Brees next year. The season is over and I’m sure the bad fans here
will be staying away from Inves….errrrrr Mile high in droves. That’s what first place gets you here,
a bunch of idiot crybaby non-fans.
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 9. (7) Jacksonville

Jacksonville can’t keep living on the edge like this can they? They’ve proven they can run with the 
big boys as well as keeping bad teams like the Bills involved for four quarters. Losing to Houston
is no shame and either is losing Fred Taylor, he has been worthless all year. Enjoy your bye week,
Jack Del Rio’s ulcers can heal.
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10.  (14) NY Giants

The Giants followed up their loss to Detroit with an unexpected win at Minnesota. Minnesota is their
bitch. They should pound Chicago this week but, screw it they will have a field day against Craig 
Krenzel .
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11. (10)  Baltimore

Baltimore’s strategy is to have Kyle Boller throw passes of two yards or less and run the ball
whenever possible. Isn’t Boller the guy could throw a ball 60 yards on his knees? I realize without
Heap and Jamal Lewis the offensive talent is piss-poor, but c’mon! The Sunday night game against
the Browns should be a snoozer.
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 12.  (12)  Packers

The Packers should’ve blown the game against the Redskins but managed to pull it out. That’s what
good teams do. Are the Packers back?  Who knows but now is the time to start playing with
Minnesota reeling. Favre hurt his hand again and the bye week slows the momentum train, but lets
Favre heal. A good trade off.
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13. (16)  San Diego

San Diego is this years Carolina. At least that is what I’m banking my future picks on. Every year
I waiver on believing the hype on the ugly duckling team but this year I’m hopping on the
Bandwagon. The last statement will come back to haunt me very soon.

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14 (13)     St. Louis

The Rams come off bye with a punch to the mouth. New England should be pissed are ready to take
it out on someone. Mike Martz has a point to prove since he screwed up their Super Bowl against
the Pats so bad. Look for the Rams to run the hell out of the ball and the Patriots to continue ignoring
the run the game as long as Dillon is hurting.
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 15. (15)  Seattle

The Seahawks finally played better last week and still managed to struggle with the Panthers. Their 
defense plays scared at the end of games and that is was is keeping opponents from taking them
seriously. Chad brown and Anthony Simmons are playing together for the first time, will that help?
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16.  (11)       Detroit

Beat the Giants and get killed by the Cowboys. This team has also blown the chance the Vikings are
giving them. How many people played WR Roy Williams last week in fantasy and got burned?
I did. 

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17.  (17) Kansas City

They are back baby! Two wins over playoff caliber teams. The Chiefs also managed to remember
Tony Gonzalez plays for them. Power Rankings say they win 10 games.
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18.  (18) Houston       

Another mess of a franchise slipping under the radar. The Texans are enjoying San Diego’s run
because it leaves them virtually ignored. No pressure. Their running game is a concern with
Dominick Davis struggling. The defense surprisingly features a great corner duo in Glenn-Robinson.
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19.  (20) Cleveland

Cleveland comes off their bye in a must win. If they can beat the Ravens again they can keep slim
Wild card hopes afloat . If they can keep William Green busy not smoking crack they may be able
to parlay him in to a draft pick. I actually believe this team is a year away from something special
when they get all of their hurt players back.
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20.  (23) Tennesee

Two teams seasons ended last Sunday. The Bengals and Titans. In beating the Bengals the Titans
proved they aren’t in the gutter yet but deflated whatever momentum Cincy had. I’m writing more
about the Bengals here cause besides Chris Brown there aint much to write about in Tennessee.
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21.  (16) Arizona 

Arizona-you morons. They beat New Orleans and Seattle but lose to the Bills and 49e
Green will get them on track this year. If McCown is the real deal we will find out soon. His
receiver corps has unlimited potential and the running game is playing surprisingly well. I guess that
is what happens when you spend 57 1st picks on your o-line. Arizona will continue to be a spre
ad
covering enigma.
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22.  (18) Dallas

How the Cowboys managed to beat down the Lions is beyond me. All I do know is Keyshawn actually got some long passes, always an encouraging sign. Dallas needs to get to work now with Philly,
 Baltimore and Seattle coming up.
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23.  (24) Cincinnati    
What a frustrating time to be a Bengal fan. They are too talented to be losing to a beat up Titans team.
The MNF game last week looks like a load shooter. Palmer had it right throwing every ball to Chad
Johnson. He should do that this week. As far as Cowboys-Bengals, do you feel comfortable giving
either team the nod? I don’t
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24.  (25) New Orleans

Hi , I’m a New Orleans Saint. Here is how I spent my bye week. Monday-went to strip club. Tuesday,
went to strip club. Wednesday, went to strip club Thursday, went to strip club Friday, went to
strip club Saturday, went to Joe Horn’s bar-b-q then went to strip club. When do we play next I’m
running out of $1 bills?

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25.  (26) Washington 
How many times did somebody trot out the Redskins lose incumbent-loses stat.. IT DIDN’T
EVEN WORK IN 96! What a stupid stat regurgitated by every hack in broadcasting. Here’s a stat-
every Presidential victor comes from a wealthy white family. You can bank on that one.
Oh the Redskins aren’t good either
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26.  (27) Oakland

How bad are things for the Raiders? The CHARGERS had to put back-ups in and is was due to
ineptness. They have a four headed monster of running backs that would start for no other team and
their QB is in a system made for QB’s who can’t throw farther than 20 yards. Oakland is officially
a BYE week for other teams.
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27.  (30) Tampa Bay

The Bucs entered their bye week feeling better with the play of Brian Griese and multiple time
felon Michael Pittman. Those two mark an improvement. This team can ruin a bunch of teams
seasons and that is all they have to play for.
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28.  (21) Carolina

The Panthers played well. Probably due more to Seattle’s inability to finish games then anything else.
Now they need to make sure they don’t go the way of the Raider and Bucs. Stephen Davis
is due back, but why bother?
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29    (28) Chicago

Craig Krenzel’s first NFL pass was a TD. You will be reading that in the Football Hall of Shame
volume #40. “Krenzel threw a TD pass and then failed to throw another one the rest of his career”
Sorry, Craig should be a serviceable QB in the NFL for years to come. Good thing the Bears never
play Anthony Thomas. He only helps them win games and beat on opposing, linebackers.
Apparently the last thing the Bearsis want to do is pretend they are a legitimate NFL franchise.
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30.  (28) Buffalo

HOORAY. The Bills win again. Here is the formula to their success. Let their special teams, defense
 and running game play perfect games and throw the ball 4 times.  I didn’t realize Shane Matthews was 
sitting there all along. He probably would be doing a better job than Bledsoe.
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31.  (32) Miami

Where do I begin? I don’t.
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32.  (32) San Francisco

Lost to the god awful Bears, but helped themselves in the grand scheme of things. Now they will
probably do something stupid and beat Seattle.
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 GAMES OF THE WEEK!
All against Spread
Big Games-1-4(13-20)
Overall 5-9
Year to date 52-64

Games of the Week

 Two great teams that don’t bug me pick of the week 

Pittsburgh Steelers+1.5 at Philadelphia Eagles 

What a run for the Steelers. They get to prove how great they are by toppling two undefeateds. How do I pick this game? The Eagles will probably be without Westbrook again yet the Steelers are on the road. That road isn’t very far and the Eagles have to lose sometime right? RIGHT? Eagles win and beat this small spread. 

EAGLES 26 Steelers 24

Super ball 30 something pick of the week

New England Patriots-2.5 at St. Louis Rams 

Rematch of a great Super Bowl. I don’t think it’s physically possible for the Patriots to lose 2 games in a row. I’ve also never understood why they never lose. It comes down to this. The Pats are banged up and the Rams are well rested AND at home.

RAMS 27 Patriots 16 

Whoever wins is sitting pretty pick of the week

Houston Texans+6.5 at Denver Broncos

The Broncos bubble has been burst. But much to my chagrin they are a good team. The Texans are playing great football on both sides of the ball. This will be the classic Broncos squeaker. Throw the spread out.

BRONCOS 21 Texans 17 

Worst game of the week pick 

Arizona Cardinals+3.5 at Miami Dolphins

What do I do here? The Dolphins are embarrassing. The Cardinals can’t beat Buffalo. At least the Cardinals will play in similar temperatures even though the humidity changes from dry to needing to take a shower after getting the paper. I will put my hopes into the Cardinals. Maybe for the last time. Look at your pick em league. Can you take Miami giving up points?

 

CARDINALS 24 Dolphins 13

MONDAY NIGHT HORROR 

Minnesota Vikings+5.5 at Indianapolis Colts 

Let me see if I have this figured out yet. Home teams covering on Monday night. OKAY! A bad stench is coming out of Minnesota and the Colts have played 4 or five “big games” already. I’ll take the Colts versus the Moss-less Vikes.

COLTS 45 Vikings 37 

The Rest of the Week

Raiders+6.5 at Panthers   PANTHERS
Redskins+3.5 at Lions      LIONS
Chiefs-2.5 at Bucs             CHIEFS
Jets-3.5 at Bills                 JETS
Dolphins at Bengals          BENGALS
Saints+6.5 at Chargers    CHARGERS
Bears-9.5 at Giants           GIANTS
Seahawks-6.5 at 49ers      SEAHAWKS
Browns at Ravens             BROWNS
 

Ten things watch for last week .

1. 84 points in the Chiefs-Colts game        
2. Buffalo fans having the best costumes    
3. Dave Wannstedt getting canned             
4. TO-Ray Ray amounting to nothing            
5.. Cowboys-Lions being unwatchable      
6. 75 leg whips in Broncos-Falcons game 
7. Cardinals playing down to the Bills level
8. Seattle benching all of their receivers     
9. Roy Williams being a game time decision and scoring another TD
10.Bush getting re-elected. 

Ten things to watch for this week

1. Minnesota backfield being a fantasy nightmare
2. Eagles-Steelers lives up to the hype
3. Houston and San Diego let us all down
4. The Chiefs have a let down at Tampa
5. Flip a coin on Roy Williams
6.  LT sits out the fourth quarter
7.  Andre Rison’s first order of business as coach will be asking his GM to trade him to the NFL
8.  TO or Buress will say something stupid this week
9.  One of the Saints players will sleep with another player’s wife
10. If the Broncos lose the fans will scream for Elway to make a comeback

Thank you for reading this!

Michael Sherwin